May 19, 2025

Millennials in Crisis: Navigating Life After The Storm

Send us a text When emerging from crisis, we must reorient ourselves to new environments with new mindsets, as the habits and perspectives that sustained us during difficult times may not serve us in seasons of abundance. • The storm truly ends when you change, not when your circumstances do • True forgiveness is an ongoing practice, not a one-time event • Crisis reveals what was truly rooted in your life versus what was surface-level • Not everyone who was with you during your storm is mean...

Send us a text

When emerging from crisis, we must reorient ourselves to new environments with new mindsets, as the habits and perspectives that sustained us during difficult times may not serve us in seasons of abundance.

• The storm truly ends when you change, not when your circumstances do
• True forgiveness is an ongoing practice, not a one-time event
• Crisis reveals what was truly rooted in your life versus what was surface-level
• Not everyone who was with you during your storm is meant to cross over with you
• After using resources from your "crisis preparedness kit," you must intentionally replenish them
• The purpose of your growth is to become a resource for others, not just for personal prosperity
• Physical health becomes increasingly important as millennials navigate major life transitions in their thirties
• Approaching your community from a place of service rather than need after they've supported you through difficulty

If this episode has been helpful to you in any way, please share it with someone who might be navigating their own post-crisis season. Let's keep unlearning together so we can experience more freedom.

00:00 - Welcome to The Unlearned Podcast

01:42 - Millennials in Crisis Series Overview

03:36 - Reorienting in Your New Place

09:07 - The Storm Ends When You Change

16:59 - The Practice of Forgiveness

22:52 - What's Real Will Be Revealed

32:03 - Not Everyone Crosses Over With You

39:58 - Replenishing What Was Used

45:22 - Pour Back Into What Sustained You

WEBVTT

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hello everybody and welcome once again to the unlearned podcast.

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I'm your host, ruth abigail aka ra.

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What's up, friends?

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It's your girl, jaquita and this is the podcast that is helping you gain the courage to change your mind so that you can experience more for freedom.

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Yes, jaquita, freedom sorry it was off my nerves.

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Okay, get up.

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You know, ruth abigail.

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A couple of a couple of days ago, ruth abigail asked me, jaquita, if you was saying karaoke, what would you sing?

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And I gave a few songs and she was like you know, your voice isn't terrible enough to where you couldn't do karaoke.

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You might enjoy it, you know, like you can do well enough, because you are very entertaining and that's really what people want with karaoke.

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You see that she's like.

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Your personality will shine through your musicians.

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You would get all the applause.

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Everybody would love you.

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Oh my gosh.

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You know what?

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That's why, when we were in college gospel choir, you know, ty Tribbett was hot back then, oh yeah, and no Way was out.

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Remember no Way yeah Ruth was like Jaquita's leading.

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Absolutely.

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Because she's going to go through and dazzle the crowd.

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Yes, so she thought I was about to be bee-bopping around the room.

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I stayed in one spot.

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And said my little lines, whatever.

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Don't let the people use you like that.

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I'm trying to boost you up.

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I knew it was good.

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I heard the vibrato.

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Can't talk Vibrato.

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It was good.

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Welcome to the podcast, friends.

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We're back.

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As you know, we're in a series um of, uh, millennials and millennials in crisis just anyone in crisis right um, and I mean you know, okay, why do we call it millennials?

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I don't know.

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I mean we'd be like but you too, all right if you have to not be a millennial.

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This could be for you, yeah, for sure, but, um, we wanted to focus on millennials because this is a common felt issue right now among people in our generation, yeah, and those some that are younger.

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So that's why we decided to focus in there, and we've had a couple episodes.

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Look, I think if you haven't listened to those, feel free to go back and check those out.

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I think they're really good.

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I think that they give a lot of.

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And check those out.

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I think they're really good.

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I think that they give a lot of.

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In those we talk about what it is, how it is you want to really prepare right Before the crisis comes, and then we talk about what your posture should be during the crisis, and in this episode, we want to talk about what happens after the crisis.

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Because, hey, hey, because we won't always be here, right, come on, yes the crisis.

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Because, hey, hey, because we won't always be here right.

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Come on, yes, yes.

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A word of encouragement for the saints right?

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yeah, we won't always be here.

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Crisis you don't.

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Crisis is not permanent.

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Yeah, crisis is temporary, and so now we don't know how long it's gonna be, but we do know that at some point, crisis is no longer uh, crisis, you will get to a point where the storm you will end over every, every moment of crisis.

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Our conflict resolves it resolves right, there will be a resolve where you will be able to move forward past the thing, exactly past that time period, past that season.

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Right there there is an answer to the situation that you're going.

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There is and so that's what we want to lean into today is, if you are in the season where you just exited your crisis or exited a shift in a difficult season, what now?

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Oh right, what now?

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And that's kind of that.

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That's that's where we want to land today.

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So, quita, um, we got a few things we want to share with the people around that we've that.

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We've um, learned unlearned.

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So what is it?

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Uh, what are some things that we need to focus on after?

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listen.

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So I think that, because this is the moment of life that I'm actually in right now, oh, come on like, I feel like I can't ability yes, relevance okay relevance I like right.

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And so you know like you get through.

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You go through these moments where you're like lord, how are you gonna do it, lord?

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When are you gonna do it, lord?

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I'm waiting, I'm waiting, I'm waiting.

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And you know you go through all of the big feelings that we talked about in the in the second episode.

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You know, like you know, I'm scared, I'm angry.

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I'm scared, I'm angry, I'm anxious, I'm nervous.

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Right, you go through all of those feelings and emotions and everything feels big.

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And then, finally, your boat lands on shore, right, and you have to take a moment to reorient yourself in your new place, because if you treat the new place like you treated the old place right, you're going to find that the old systems don't work and the new?

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you know how they say when in Rome do as the Romans do when in success, do as the successful do, right.

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And there are some mindsets, there are some habits.

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There are some disciplines.

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There are some some understandings, right.

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There are even some assumptions.

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There are some disciplines.

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There are some, uh, some understandings, right.

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There are even some assumptions.

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There are some assumptions that you made about successful people that once you get to the point of, okay, my ship finally landed the things that you assumed about people who were in those positions, you find out that it's not exactly as you thought it was Right.

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And you also find that it's not your habits that are leading you that can lead you to a place of deficit again, it's your mindset.

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Yeah, right, because your mindset is feeding your habits.

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That's absolutely right.

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And so you start looking.

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You're like oh Lord Right.

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And so you start looking.

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You're like oh lord right, and so you need to take a moment.

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Yeah, you can take a moment and look around and say where am I?

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yes, where am I because you know, I think the the thing and I've shared this before 21, 2021, 22 was probably my most recent her keyboard hands, yeah my most recent crisis moment yeah um, and it was, it was in leadership.

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And um, man, I, I really did.

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I did not see how I was getting out of that and, and so I think something to acknowledge and like looking at this new place is actually allowing yourself to believe it's real yeah because I think that my, my, my issue, that I really took me so a while probably took me about a year, a year after that to work through it is believing that what was happening wasn't about to happen again.

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Right and so approaching, oh, this new place, like you said, with the same mindset that had to heal.

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Oh, and it took me a minute, right and but, but I realized it was different.

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But I didn't know how to operate there because I was still so jaded or just so broken from the last place.

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But I, I knew I didn't want to remain that way, like I did have that awareness right where I was.

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I said I know I can't treat this like it was, yeah, but I'm scared to treat it like it's different.

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Oh, because I don't want what happened to happen again.

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I could shed a little tear you know I'm saying oh, and I think you know just that.

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Like that, think of this as an example.

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If you come from a place of lack right, of not having enough, you are going to really be intentional.

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When you do get your abundance, your extra, how are you going to treat the abundance when you're used to not having enough, right?

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You landed in a new place and you have new resources.

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You have new landscape.

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You know God has enlarged your territory.

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All right, y'all have heard it.

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All right, increase your capacity.

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You're in new spaces of influence and leadership.

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You know you have all of these new opportunities that are abounding for you.

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But now the question is how do I shift my mindset?

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Because it's not about managing lack, it's about managing abundance.

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Because it's not about managing lack, it's about managing abundance, right, and that is a different skill set.

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It's a different skill set and it's a different mindset towards it, right?

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But again, I kind of want to point us back, and we're going to talk about this a little bit later.

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Point us back toward community, right, because your community may shift, right, but your community has to be built off of who went through, who came to the other side with me.

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Your community may shift right, but your community has to be built off of who, who went through, who came to the other side with me.

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Am I still trying to have community with where I left or am I allowing myself to be community?

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To build community with where I landed?

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Yeah, right, and you have to.

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You have to draw some differentiations and it's not that like again, the people, the people that were with you, the people, the people that were with you, you know, 20 years ago, are not still with you, you know.

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But you have to evaluate mindset wise, you have to evaluate habits, you have to evaluate what's in the other people.

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And did they land with me in this new place?

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So I think you know that idea of understanding what the new place looks like.

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Where did the storm get you?

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Where are you now, when everything has kind of settled down, right?

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But here's the thing.

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I think here's kind of our next thought here Unlearning that the storm settles down when the thing outside of you changes, because really the storm and I think you have to recognize, uh, sometimes it's deciding when the storm actually has ended that's good, right, so so, for for most of the time, the storm ends when you change.

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it doesn't necessarily end when the thing that that that caused it, if you will changes.

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Yeah, kind of carts back to some of the things we're talking about in the other episodes.

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But I think it's so important to mark the moment of a shift, not based on the external uh, external realities You've got to market, based on how you are.

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Yeah.

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And, and I think that's so.

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So in my how you are, yeah, and, and I think that's so, so in my, in my example, there was a, a situation.

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I was just my, I was.

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You know, I was very fragile as a leader.

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I felt like I failed in a lot of ways and I didn't know I was having a hard time recovering from that.

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One of the things that, um, I experienced a lot of transition with my team at a certain point right, and it was tough and it was.

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Some was expected, some was unexpected, and so this idea of people coming or going has has been sensitive yeah, you know, I'm saying like it's sensitive.

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It probably was a year and some change after that season where there was another transition and it was, I mean, literally this had to be gosh last year, I think, where, um, so it was a couple of years, uh, where it happened and I actually the the thing that happened happened and I remember telling people I may have even told you like I know I'm better because I know, like I don't have the anxiety I would have had six months before.

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Yeah.

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And, and so for me, even though the circumstances of some things within, within the environment of running a nonprofit, has not changed much, right, it's still hard.

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Yeah, we're not.

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I don't you know, there are some things I wish were different, as we all do, right, especially in this time.

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But I knew that I had changed because when the, when something that resembled a past issue came back, yeah, I did not, I didn't react the way I would have yeah that's how you know you're out of the storm yeah it's not that the issues don't come back yeah it's that you do not meet them as the same person.

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Yeah, and that is where that's where your power lies, because you never know where the issue comes.

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You can't know and you can't control that, and so I think, understanding and naming it for that reason and not because something has changed yeah, I think you have to be intentional about knowing that the victory.

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If you make the victory the the fact that your situation changed oh man right, instead of the fact that you changed, you will miss, you will man, you will not have what you need to sustain the change okay because what sustains the change is not the circumstance.

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Yeah, it's again and I use this word because it's kind of my word for the season it is your surrender.

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Yeah, it is your ability to recognize that the victory was my growth, my development, my new revelation, awareness, all of the things.

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Yeah, right, that's what's going to sustain your next season, right?

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So, if you are a person who you know you were fighting to get that raise, fighting to get that extra abundance and that extra money and you fought to get it it is not the money that will sustain you through your next season.

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Right, it is the mindset change it's the mindset right, it is your commitment to being a better you.

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Yes, and I think so.

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There's a therapist.

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I think I've sent you some of her reels.

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I only know her through Instagram, but I love her content because she talks about understanding healing in terms of not just healing and understanding where your trauma comes from and how to manage it yeah but what building capacity looks like, so that, as you are healing, you're also building capacity, understanding that the traumas that you, that that that different different types of traumas right, and I'm using that in a very general term different types of of things that don't mean us good, that something, a lot of which we don't control, can still happen.

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So the question is my healing process did it help me to avoid or did it help me to build capacity?

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That's so good and I think that, and she, that's a.

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you know, I don't think that's her whole message, but it's a lot of what I've been here and I love, I love that because she's she is, um, I think, regulating some of the mental health conversations, because it's we've swung so far uh, I think so far to the diagnosis, into the you know, this is who I am, because I have this thing.

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It's like that, you know, making that your identity.

00:14:23.423 --> 00:14:30.371
But it's really about, yeah, we go through stuff, yeah, yeah, we go, but at some point, what did that thing?

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How did that?

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What did that build in you?

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If you're not meeting the next thing with a higher capacity to handle it, did you really heal?

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And I think that's the question and I think it's a good like.

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Are you really out of the storm?

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I don't even say if we even flip it Right.

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So let's say you have an issue, let's just use money because it's something that's relevant, people get it.

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So you went from broke to abundance my Lord Right, and we celebrate that.

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And so the thing, the external thing, actually did change for you.

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Yeah.

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But what did?

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that process do inside?

00:15:04.671 --> 00:15:12.705
Yeah, because if it didn't change, when you get the abundance, you won't handle that well and you'll end up back where you are, where you'll end up back at the broke state.

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So it goes.

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I think it you have.

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At the end of the day, even if the outside world is better, if you aren't better, it doesn't matter, yeah.

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So the outside world can be, can can be worse, can be the same or be better.

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You gotta focus on your change, yeah, and don't assume that you've changed just because the situation has changed it.

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You might not have right, and so I think that you didn't change because of the situation.

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You changed because of the process right like yeah and the.

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The process is not about the process is not about changing your situation.

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The process is molding and shaping and forging you into something, into something brand new.

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And so, when you get to the new place, it is important that you evaluate what's new in the place that, in the place that I've entered into, but also what's new in me.

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What's new in me, what's new in the place that, in the place that I've entered into, but also what's new in me.

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What's new in me.

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What's new in me.

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I have a greater resilience.

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Right, I have a greater.

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I have a greater capacity.

00:16:12.462 --> 00:16:14.227
Right, I move quicker.

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I'm thinking through things in a way that is more God aligned.

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Right, what is new in you.

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And embrace that and and and.

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While you're embracing it, realize and I'm trying real hard not to skip to another point, but it's just real good to me yeah, but realize that what you're embracing, everybody else ain't embracing.

00:16:33.144 --> 00:16:34.145
Yeah, but, but.

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But.

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In order for you to stay new, you have to be committed to what's new and not allow anything to take you back to, to the, to the stormy waters that you just got out of.

00:16:50.368 --> 00:16:52.793
So, in that, what's the next thing you think we unlearned?

00:16:53.159 --> 00:16:53.441
Okay.

00:16:53.441 --> 00:16:59.453
So I think you know we talked in the last episode about not having that victim mentality.

00:16:59.453 --> 00:17:16.237
You know, I think once you get out of that place, once you get out of excuse me once you get out of that dark place where you're, you know, you were kind of bogged down in the situation and you get to this, you hit the shore of new.

00:17:16.237 --> 00:17:22.424
You have to go back through your mind and you really have to practice the art of forgiveness.

00:17:22.424 --> 00:17:23.786
You really have to practice the art of forgiveness.

00:17:23.806 --> 00:17:31.352
It is necessary, as you move from shore to shore, that you don't allow yourself to hold on Forgiveness.

00:17:31.352 --> 00:17:35.135
Unforgiveness keeps you tied to the past man.

00:17:35.135 --> 00:17:37.356
It keeps you tied to what happened.

00:17:37.356 --> 00:17:41.762
It keeps you tied to who you were when it happened.

00:17:41.762 --> 00:17:45.692
It keeps you tied to who you thought and what you thought you were supposed to have.

00:17:45.692 --> 00:17:49.471
That is now not what you end where you ended up at.

00:17:49.471 --> 00:17:55.613
If you do not practice forgiveness, you will ultimately recreate.

00:17:55.613 --> 00:18:04.015
You can be in a new place, but recreate the same scenarios and the same situations in your new place that you left.

00:18:04.859 --> 00:18:07.108
So how do you know you've really forgiven?

00:18:07.108 --> 00:18:13.549
Because I know a lot of people who say, yeah, I've forgiven them, like I don't, I don't, I've forgiven, I've forgiven the situation, I forgive.

00:18:13.549 --> 00:18:18.730
And sometimes it sometimes seems like I mean, have you like you know, you know what?

00:18:18.730 --> 00:18:19.873
What is the sign?

00:18:19.873 --> 00:18:33.972
And sometimes we feel like I know there have been moments in my life where I've been convinced that I have forgiven um certain people, but when their name comes back up, something happens inside of me and I get all mad again and so like what's this?

00:18:33.972 --> 00:18:36.381
How do you know that you're really forgiving somebody?

00:18:36.541 --> 00:18:37.243
I don't know.

00:18:37.364 --> 00:19:00.346
I think one of kind of the greatest impediments to people's healing journeys is this ideology that forgiveness is a one-time thing okay, yeah, that's right, like you know, like I have talked to people and and you know, like you're having conversations with them and it's so apparent to you, as you're talking to them, that, like you, are deeply affected by this thing that happened in your past.

00:19:00.346 --> 00:19:04.789
But then they will tell you I forgave them, I'm good, I let it go right.

00:19:04.789 --> 00:19:06.861
You know I moved on, yeah, you know.

00:19:06.861 --> 00:19:08.726
But forgiveness when, when?

00:19:08.726 --> 00:19:18.461
Uh, I can't remember which disciple it was I think it might have been Peter who said you know how many times I gotta forgive yeah and Jesus said 70 times 70 you know like it is.

00:19:18.681 --> 00:19:28.267
It is not a one time, all right, I just going to do this one big forgiveness tour, all right, and I forgave everybody and I moved on.

00:19:28.267 --> 00:19:31.650
It is a, it is a practice.

00:19:31.650 --> 00:19:36.272
Forgiveness is a lifestyle, because you're going to be triggered again.

00:19:36.393 --> 00:19:46.640
Yeah, you know something, something's going to remind you of that old person, that old man, yes, of the old thoughts, thoughts of the old mentalities, of the old habits.

00:19:46.640 --> 00:19:48.923
Something is going to come to trigger you.

00:19:48.923 --> 00:19:58.372
Yeah, that is the enemy's job, in fact, is to bring something up that will trigger that person, that that thing that he wants inside of you, that identifies with him.

00:19:58.840 --> 00:20:03.849
That's his job yeah all right, and he does not slack on his job, he is.

00:20:03.849 --> 00:20:05.933
He got triggers right around the corner for you.

00:20:05.933 --> 00:20:16.537
Yeah Right, and that's why you have to be intentional that when things do come up, you take your moment, you feel your feelings, you surrender it and you forgive it.

00:20:16.740 --> 00:20:17.000
Yeah.

00:20:17.181 --> 00:20:20.932
And you say, lord, I'm not going to hold this charge on their account.

00:20:20.932 --> 00:20:23.951
Yeah, because that's what's actually building up your account.

00:20:23.951 --> 00:20:25.759
Is you releasing the charges?

00:20:25.759 --> 00:20:30.810
Because the Bible says that if we don't forgive, god can't forgive.

00:20:30.810 --> 00:20:38.285
So the debts that your whole debt that are being held against you cannot be released if you don't release other people's debts.

00:20:38.285 --> 00:20:41.807
Forgive us, our debtors, as we forgive those who are indebted to us.

00:20:41.901 --> 00:21:08.611
And I think that, understanding that the same Christ who died for your debt died for theirs, and that when you don't forgive, you are, you are, um, holding on to debt that's already been paid for, yeah, and so it's like you, you, you can release it, because it's not Jesus didn't just, you know, he just he didn't just die for us, he died for all of it, even the things that affected us.

00:21:08.611 --> 00:21:13.067
So we can release it, knowing it's already been taken care of, the debt has been paid.

00:21:13.067 --> 00:21:14.269
Yeah, it is.

00:21:14.269 --> 00:21:19.182
And it is a hard concept to come to, uh, because you feel like you're owed something.

00:21:19.182 --> 00:21:20.464
It's like, no, but they does.

00:21:20.464 --> 00:21:22.068
I deserve this and I do.

00:21:22.068 --> 00:21:25.563
I deserve an apology, I deserve restitution.

00:21:25.563 --> 00:21:39.694
I deserve and that's real, and maybe you do, but the reality is you might not get it, and so are you going to continue to hold on to resentment because you're not getting something that is probably not coming to you.

00:21:40.019 --> 00:21:40.682
Yeah, you know what I'm saying?

00:21:40.682 --> 00:21:42.207
That's it, and it's hard.

00:21:42.227 --> 00:21:42.890
No, I think you're right.

00:21:42.890 --> 00:22:03.196
I think that is it's important to know again every person that you are, that you, when you feel entitled to receive what you feel like you're old, entitled to receive what you feel like you're old you are also saying I am willing to be stuck in my old thing until I get what they, what they were supposed to give me.

00:22:03.196 --> 00:22:07.970
But that was in the other place you can't get what God has for you.

00:22:08.010 --> 00:22:18.442
Yes, in the new place, because you're so fixated on getting what you feel like you were old from the last place and we got it's dangerous, yeah, and we gotta unlearn that, yeah yeah, what's the next point?

00:22:19.183 --> 00:22:38.560
okay, so we we alluded to this, uh, I think, a couple episodes ago, as this would be a reality, uh, but anytime you experience any type of extreme, whether it's positive or negative, um, what's real is going to be revealed, right?

00:22:38.560 --> 00:22:49.467
Oh yeah, so this is the moment where you start to see, where you will see, uh, what has actually stayed with you.

00:22:49.768 --> 00:22:57.309
Yeah, right um, when, when, when you you've gone through a storm, what you actually were deeply rooted to.

00:22:57.309 --> 00:23:01.746
This could be people, this could be circumstances, this could be mindsets.

00:23:01.746 --> 00:23:04.750
This could be a lot of different things.

00:23:04.750 --> 00:23:12.688
This could be your faith right, your spiritual walk, and whatever that looks like for you.

00:23:12.688 --> 00:23:16.645
When you come out of the storm, is it still with you?

00:23:16.645 --> 00:23:21.107
Do you find yourself in a period of deconstruction?

00:23:21.107 --> 00:23:23.054
I'm not against deconstruction.

00:23:23.054 --> 00:23:28.134
I'm against destructive deconstruction, that is, I don't think that that's healthy.

00:23:28.134 --> 00:23:29.420
But sometimes you got to unpack some stuff.

00:23:29.420 --> 00:23:29.981
I get that.

00:23:29.981 --> 00:23:39.885
But if you come out of a difficult situation and you find yourself throwing away things that before you would have said that you held tightly to, yeah, then it just it.

00:23:40.366 --> 00:23:58.181
It helps you understand what was real for you yeah right, and in that then you can take uh inventory to say what was real, what was really rooted, what was on the surface, what's been washed away, what's staying with me, and then, what do I do now with all that right?

00:23:58.181 --> 00:24:04.846
And so I think it's a just understand that that's going to happen when you, when you've come, things are going to, things are going to shift.

00:24:04.846 --> 00:24:16.871
Um, relationships will shift, which we'll talk about, uh, but other circumstances, mindsets will shift, uh, you know, all those different things will will be different, and you have to.

00:24:16.871 --> 00:24:23.691
You have to ask yourself what actually was, as sometimes things aren't as real as we thought they were.

00:24:23.691 --> 00:24:25.604
Sometimes the your career.

00:24:25.604 --> 00:24:26.689
I thought this is the case.

00:24:26.689 --> 00:24:29.421
Right, let's talk about from a, from a from a professional standpoint.

00:24:29.421 --> 00:24:36.163
Right, we have spent so much time um say, this is what my calling is, this is what I'm supposed to be doing.

00:24:36.163 --> 00:24:39.378
Xyz covid, hit my lord.

00:24:39.378 --> 00:24:39.601
You know.

00:24:39.601 --> 00:24:46.508
Global crisis, right, that's the best crisis that we could talk about, because everybody currently listening experienced that right, and we did.

00:24:46.788 --> 00:24:57.713
And so, when I, a lot of people made a career change after that, a lot, of, a lot of people who were in uh in these, in, in a lot of careers, they switched to entrepreneurship.

00:24:57.713 --> 00:25:07.074
Equally, a lot of people who had to do entrepreneurship because of COVID who said I'm running this business and I'm excited about it.

00:25:07.074 --> 00:25:10.809
When we came out of COVID, it didn't stick with them.

00:25:10.809 --> 00:25:14.450
They weren't as entrepreneurial as you thought.

00:25:14.450 --> 00:25:18.250
You really were just trying to survive because you were in a storm.

00:25:18.250 --> 00:25:27.375
But there were those that found that it's like I actually needed that storm to show me that this is the direction in my professional life I really wanted to go.

00:25:27.375 --> 00:25:29.372
So you have to take that and evaluate it.

00:25:29.372 --> 00:25:34.970
You know what I mean and really be honest about OK, because your storm changes you.

00:25:34.970 --> 00:25:36.153
Yeah, ok, cool.

00:25:36.153 --> 00:25:37.324
So what do I do?

00:25:37.324 --> 00:25:40.304
What am I gonna do now with the things that I have left?

00:25:40.503 --> 00:26:02.830
yeah, and I think that it's important to note that, when you're, one of the things that we come out of storms with is the, the knowing that, like I can create a better reality, like I, like, once you get to that next place, you're like, okay, there is a creative power on the inside of me that can, that can shift into a new season.

00:26:02.830 --> 00:26:26.086
Right, like, and so, like you have this mentality of everything doesn't have to be as it's always been, that's correct, right, and so when you get to that next place, like you know what you were saying Like, when we think about careers, I think as millennials, we went through school thinking, okay, my career is gonna, is, will be what will set me up for success.

00:26:26.146 --> 00:26:26.769
Right, right Right.

00:26:27.000 --> 00:26:27.561
Like I knew.

00:26:27.561 --> 00:26:33.381
When I went to college I was like, oh, I'm coming out of here making you know, like I had a number in mind.

00:26:33.381 --> 00:26:42.025
I think at the time I was like I'm going to graduate with this bachelor's degree and I'm going to make at least $45,000, $50,000, you know out the gate, out the gate.

00:26:42.085 --> 00:26:52.368
And then I was like, well, I went from bachelor's to grad school and I was like, oh, okay, I'm going to come out of Vandy making at least, you know, $60,000.

00:26:52.368 --> 00:27:04.234
You know, when I, as I continue to move and push through my career, I realize I can't be dependent on no job to get me to the place, the financial place that I'm hoping to be.

00:27:04.234 --> 00:27:07.876
Yeah, that is not going to be the source, not the only source.

00:27:07.876 --> 00:27:11.738
Yeah, I have got to be able to think outside of the box.

00:27:11.738 --> 00:27:15.542
Right, and going through a storm will help you.

00:27:15.542 --> 00:27:23.359
Let me tell you something Nothing, nothing brings out them creative juices, absolutely Like a, like a crisis moment, like a crisis.

00:27:23.359 --> 00:27:26.406
You know I, you know I actually think better under pressure.

00:27:26.426 --> 00:27:28.791
You know not that I'm inviting any storms into my life.

00:27:28.791 --> 00:27:29.093
Lord.

00:27:29.220 --> 00:27:29.401
Sure.

00:27:29.641 --> 00:27:31.667
I just want to say you know, you know where we are.

00:27:31.667 --> 00:27:32.450
We on the shore now.

00:27:32.450 --> 00:27:38.261
We ain't trying to go back into the sea, ok, on the shore now, we ain't trying to go back into the sea, okay.

00:27:38.261 --> 00:27:39.124
But you know, I I think that it's.

00:27:39.124 --> 00:27:45.253
It's really important that you realize that you gained more than than access or than resources.

00:27:45.253 --> 00:28:10.932
Or then you know, being in this new place, there is something inside of you that has opened up that will allow you to produce more right, and so the things that got rooted up, you know, you don't you can grieve some of those things, but allow, allow what stayed to remain, because that's the foundation that you're going to be building right, right, right, and I think I think it's important.

00:28:11.440 --> 00:28:26.494
Yes, and I I think you need to make sure that they that the things that are of high value and importance, if you find that they are more shaky after the storm.

00:28:26.494 --> 00:28:28.175
I wouldn't ignore that.

00:28:28.356 --> 00:28:30.385
Reinvest and we reinvest, right.

00:28:30.820 --> 00:28:33.757
I don't think those are things to throw away, which I don't think is what you were saying.

00:28:33.777 --> 00:28:34.240
Yeah, no for sure.

00:28:34.319 --> 00:28:44.749
Making sure that we are not throwing away things that truly are foundational, right, our, our spirit, our spirituality is foundational, that's, that's you have to deal with that somehow.

00:28:44.749 --> 00:28:47.505
However you deal with it, you've got to deal with that, right?

00:28:47.505 --> 00:28:51.028
Uh, your, your, your mental state is foundational.

00:29:01.519 --> 00:29:02.082
You have to deal with that.

00:29:02.082 --> 00:29:02.723
Your emotional is foundational.

00:29:02.723 --> 00:29:03.246
You gotta deal with that.

00:29:03.246 --> 00:29:04.991
Your physical being like you, you being healthy physically you gotta deal with that.

00:29:04.991 --> 00:29:07.059
Listen, I think we need to put a little pin there, okay, because millennials, we're having children.

00:29:07.059 --> 00:29:07.982
Yep, you know we're.

00:29:07.982 --> 00:29:23.188
I feel like, as a generation, we're having children later, we're getting married later and so all the things when people hit in their 20s, their bodies were at a different point right, you know, and so our bodies going through all of these changes.

00:29:23.789 --> 00:29:33.568
in our 30s it's different and you have to make sure that you are taking care of your physical body and not letting it get swept away in a storm.

00:29:34.101 --> 00:29:37.446
Yes, that's not one that we let go, and not even just the family stuff.

00:29:37.507 --> 00:29:43.028
You know, like the stressors of life, you know things that you have been carrying alone by yourself.

00:29:43.028 --> 00:29:43.931
Y'all know my earring.

00:29:43.931 --> 00:29:45.626
One thing it's going to do is fall out.

00:29:45.626 --> 00:29:50.104
One thing it's going to do is pop out on us, right, but?

00:29:50.104 --> 00:29:59.534
But you have to make sure that you are mindful that your millennial moment, yeah, Middle adult moment.

00:30:00.335 --> 00:30:01.717
Your what?

00:30:01.717 --> 00:30:04.845
What was I saying?

00:30:04.845 --> 00:30:06.989
Oh, wait, wait, wait your physical.

00:30:07.329 --> 00:30:32.089
Yes, you have to make sure that, because here's the truth of the matter and this to all my called people, to all the purpose driven people, to everybody who, who is, who is moving forward, being elevated, if you will, in a season of purpose, in a season of activating something new on the inside of you, your physical body has to be able to maintain all of that.

00:30:32.530 --> 00:30:42.848
You can have victory in all these different areas of your life, but your actual body, yes, has to carry the purpose that you're feeling called to you won't be able to sustain.

00:30:42.868 --> 00:30:49.771
Yeah, if you, if you physically are not healthy, yeah, and yeah, so figure out I'm not we're not here to prescribe.

00:30:49.952 --> 00:30:50.980
You know, we don't do that.

00:30:50.980 --> 00:31:07.971
That's not what we do we do have someone who can uh producer joy, but nevertheless it ain't us, yeah, it's not our lane and so I think that it's important that you know we're mindful that your body.

00:31:07.971 --> 00:31:14.532
You have to take care of it, and I and I feel like it's the perfect time for us as middle adults, as millennials.

00:31:14.532 --> 00:31:16.082
We got to be intentional about that.

00:31:16.883 --> 00:31:20.146
So while you put on your earring, we'll give you a second put on your earring.

00:31:20.146 --> 00:31:20.907
You want to put that back on?

00:31:20.907 --> 00:31:20.948
I?

00:31:21.328 --> 00:31:22.190
don't know where the back went.

00:31:22.369 --> 00:31:24.573
Oh, okay, never mind then.

00:31:24.573 --> 00:31:25.374
Oh, it's here.

00:31:25.374 --> 00:31:25.994
Oh, look at that.

00:31:25.994 --> 00:31:40.281
Okay, so we're going to move on.

00:31:40.281 --> 00:31:45.063
But we are going to move is the next thing, and I and I think this is one that you wanted to you had said something earlier.

00:31:45.063 --> 00:31:46.867
Like you, you didn't want to move to this point.

00:31:46.867 --> 00:31:47.470
I kept wanting.

00:31:47.470 --> 00:31:55.435
I know this is a very key and crucial one that means a lot to both of us, like this is huge yeah, I think this is huge.

00:31:55.435 --> 00:31:56.156
So what's the next?

00:31:56.196 --> 00:31:56.337
thing.

00:31:56.337 --> 00:32:03.455
I think it is important that you realize that everybody didn't cross over with you.

00:32:03.455 --> 00:32:23.940
Yeah, right, that while you were in the boat and god was working on you and you were getting all these revelations and you were coming into all these understandings, and you came out and you're finally on the shore, on the other side of the storm, and you get there and you start trying to to re-establish those connections.

00:32:23.940 --> 00:32:26.384
You're and you want to tell everybody.

00:32:26.384 --> 00:32:34.868
You're like, hey, I made it over, I'm, I crossed over, like I'm here, like I'm come build with me, come work with me, come do this with me.

00:32:34.868 --> 00:32:36.251
You know, because I made it.

00:32:36.251 --> 00:32:39.303
And and you want to bring people with you.

00:32:39.523 --> 00:32:41.807
Abraham, right, all right.

00:32:41.807 --> 00:32:43.070
Story of abraham.

00:32:43.070 --> 00:32:44.653
God called him out of a land.

00:32:44.653 --> 00:32:50.529
He said, hey, you, abraham, you come right and leave your father's house.

00:32:50.529 --> 00:32:56.228
But abraham did not want to go to his new place without bringing his old connections.

00:32:56.228 --> 00:32:56.930
Yeah, right.

00:32:56.930 --> 00:32:57.892
So he brought lot.

00:32:58.300 --> 00:33:01.155
And what happens when you bring a lot right?

00:33:01.155 --> 00:33:01.940
Which is his nephew?

00:33:01.940 --> 00:33:05.614
What happens when you bring a lot into the new place with you?

00:33:05.614 --> 00:33:23.708
When you crossed over and you brought something that was in the past into your new place that did not go through the same process that you went through, has not been made new in the same way that you've been made new has not spent the time, has not submitted, surrendered, right, they are looking.

00:33:23.768 --> 00:33:29.891
When you walk in the new land, you're seeing purpose, you're seeing expansion, you're seeing increase.

00:33:29.891 --> 00:33:30.492
Right.

00:33:30.492 --> 00:33:34.330
When they walk in, all they see is unfamiliar.

00:33:34.330 --> 00:33:38.310
All they see is I don't know how to operate in this new place.

00:33:38.310 --> 00:33:47.704
So what they're going to do is bring the old system into the new place, and two cannot walk together unless they be agreed.

00:33:47.704 --> 00:33:59.733
And we spend so much time trying to walk with people who don't yet yet yet agree with who God has created us to be and what God has set us.

00:33:59.733 --> 00:34:32.429
Because God, when you landed on your new shore and your new land, god sent you there and set you with an intention, like he's pushing you in the back and saying go and be intentional about a thing, but if you got people around you who don't have the same intention, you're gonna get pulled backwards I think my mom used to tell me this when I was um little, that like little, like baby, like two, one, two, I didn't like saying goodbye to people.

00:34:32.449 --> 00:34:38.396
This has always been something, and I remember her telling me that a long time ago.

00:34:38.396 --> 00:34:42.534
And, um, I and, but I realized that that is just true.

00:34:42.534 --> 00:34:44.420
I actually don't like saying goodbye to people.

00:34:44.420 --> 00:34:46.244
I don't.

00:34:46.244 --> 00:34:49.193
I make really strong connections with people.

00:34:49.193 --> 00:34:54.106
I don't make a lot of strong connections, but the ones I do connect with I, it's strong.

00:34:54.206 --> 00:35:09.237
Yeah, and this principle has been difficult for me because I do recognize that, um, going through things changing it, will it?

00:35:09.237 --> 00:35:15.871
It will put you in a position to where you might have to say goodbye to people, yeah, and, and it might have to be you to do it.

00:35:15.871 --> 00:35:18.094
Sometimes they'll just go away and you won't have to do it, but it might have to be you to do it.

00:35:18.094 --> 00:35:43.632
Sometimes they'll just go away and you won't have to do it, but sometimes you have to be intentional about making the separation, about saying I am going to intentionally separate myself and say goodbye to this person because I have been brought into a different space and that person is not in that same place yeah and so if that is you and you find yourself there, uh, first of all, I do understand that is really tough.

00:35:43.972 --> 00:35:50.032
Um, I don't do it well, like I don't say goodbye, well, I don't, even when I know I'm supposed to.

00:35:50.032 --> 00:36:24.641
Uh, I have, I have had moments where I should have separated myself from certain people on my own and done it intentionally and instead just allow things to fester, and eventually it happened, but I, I, I, I was stuck for a minute, or I just wasn't, as I couldn't be as progressive, you know what I mean Like I couldn't, I couldn't go forward faster because I was too afraid to let go of of certain people, and so that is, I think that is a huge thing we have to unlearn.

00:36:24.641 --> 00:36:27.809
It might not, the storm might not separate you.

00:36:27.809 --> 00:36:29.032
You might have to do it.

00:36:30.661 --> 00:36:37.574

Millennials in Crisis: Navigating Life After The Storm

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