Nov. 17, 2025

The UnLearnT Podcast LIVE: Enduring Leadership

The UnLearnT Podcast LIVE: Enduring Leadership

Send us a text We go live to name the weight of leading through hard seasons and offer practical ways to endure with hope, clarity, and integrity. We unpack how to recover from mistakes faster, re-categorize relationships, and reinvest in the vision without burning out. • defining enduring leadership and long faith • guarding inputs, language and circles • year‑end discouragement and resetting hope • crew checks and relationship categories • expectations based on evidence not desire • mistak...

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Send us a text

We go live to name the weight of leading through hard seasons and offer practical ways to endure with hope, clarity, and integrity. We unpack how to recover from mistakes faster, re-categorize relationships, and reinvest in the vision without burning out.

• defining enduring leadership and long faith
• guarding inputs, language and circles
• year‑end discouragement and resetting hope
• crew checks and relationship categories
• expectations based on evidence not desire
• mistakes, restitution and shorter recovery
• weights to lay aside versus sins to repent
• hard truths leaders must accept
• reinvesting, pivoting and finding the tipping point
• leading people versus managing projects

If you thought this live was worth anything, share it with somebody else. Like, share, subscribe to the podcast, join the community


00:04 - Live Welcome And Theme

00:31 - Defining Enduring Leadership

01:34 - Year-End Discouragement And Hope

03:18 - Guarding Inputs, Speech, And Circle

06:20 - Crew Check And Relationship Categories

10:04 - Expectations, Faith, And Reframing Hope

15:23 - Leadership Responsibility And Long Faith

19:54 - Pain, Self-Awareness, And Modeling Endurance

24:33 - Mistakes, Recovery, And Making It Right

31:00 - Shortening Recovery Time And Rebound Mindset

36:04 - Heaviness, Boundaries, And What To Lay Aside

41:44 - Acceptance: Hard Truths Leaders Must Unlearn

51:32 - Reinventing, Reinvesting, And Pivots

59:51 - More People, More Work: Managing Humans

01:04:02 - Tipping Point And Final Charge

01:06:35 - Announcements And The Second Act Launch

01:09:28 - Subscribe, Share, And Closing Thanks

WEBVTT

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What's up, everybody?

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Welcome once again to the Unlert Podcast Live Edition.

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I'm Ruth Abigail, aka R A.

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What's up, friends?

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It's your girl, Jaquita.

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We are live and in Living Color.

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Yeah, we are.

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Yeah, we are.

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We are the podcast that is going to help you gain the courage to change your mind so that you can experience more freedom.

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And welcome to the second live event that we have ever had.

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We love to be here.

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I am super excited because today we are talking about a topic that I think is so relevant.

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Um, we're talking about enduring leadership.

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And when you think about the times and the seasons, when you think about what's going on in the streets, we ain't got to name it.

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Okay.

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Y'all been all right.

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All right.

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Y'all see it, right?

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You know, just persistence, tenacity, and continuing to have envision have visions and dreams in times where it seems like things are going darker or things are not going in ways that we may have imagined that they would have gone.

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It's hard to keep dreaming.

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It's hard to keep to keep leading.

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And so we wanted to come to you guys today to talk about how do we persist through times where it's really hard to do so.

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Yeah, really, really hard.

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And like it's hard just in society, but also I just feel like these this time, welcome guys, if you're just joining, we we we we are we're here.

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Welcome.

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If you could let us know that you're here, drop drop your uh name or something in the chat so we can say hi.

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Hello in the chat, please.

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Um so I think just in general, this time of year, just about every year is tough because you're coming up to the end of the year.

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And Quido, you said something uh actually we prayed before this.

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You said something in the prayer of like, you know, if people are wondering uh or or maybe feel a little discouraged about how they're ending the year.

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Yeah.

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I think some I think we get to this year, and no matter how the year went, I feel like most most people, most of us get to the end of the year and be like, man, there's something I didn't do, there's something I didn't accomplish, and we kind of hang on that, you know what I mean?

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And so we want to just kind of name that first of all as a reality and then also kind of help us to push through it.

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So like it don't have to feel like that, and I have to feel like that.

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Um, we can uh we can move forward and end the year well and start the year strong, even if you feel like it hadn't been exactly what you wanted it to be.

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Yeah, no, for sure.

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Hey Sebastian, hi Miss Tracy.

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Sorry, I could I'm looking at all of our hellos and wanted to make sure we acknowledge our friends.

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If you are just joining us and you're coming in, make sure you say hello.

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We want to engage with you guys on tonight.

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So good to see so good to see my friends.

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Um, you know, one thing that has really gotten me, um, you know, when I think about leadership and being in roles and places where you have impact and influence, and you know, I feel like I've gone from a place of feeling like it's my job to lead people into like future endeavors and opening doors and figuring out how great the future can be.

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Now I feel like we I've gone into a place of protection and sheltering and and uh it it makes you start building fences instead of gates, right?

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Where's I started building walls instead of doors, and so I think that it's really it's really been a season where I've had to restructure my hope, right?

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Because a lot of times when we think about hope, hope is a belief in a future.

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It is a belief in what is to come, not in thinking about what is now, but what can come, what can be.

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And it's the possibilities of things and the hope for things, you know.

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Bible says that faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not yet seen, right?

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Hope is it's not seen, it doesn't feel possible, it doesn't feel like you know you're really sitting in it, but I believe even when it doesn't look like I can have what I'm seeing in my mind.

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And so I've had to really re-ignite hope in this season, right?

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And I've had to be really intentional about how I do that.

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Um, one of the ways that I've had to be intentional is I've had to watch my conversation.

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Yeah, right.

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Because, and I've I've had to watch both what comes in and what's going out.

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Yeah.

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Right.

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If you are constantly ingesting things that are really stressing you out, yeah, man.

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That really make you feel like, man, we're in hard times.

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Life sucks.

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The state of the world sucks.

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You know, the state of my job sucks.

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If you're constantly ingesting that, you cannot hope to build something that will be able to fight against that.

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Absolutely.

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So you have to watch both what you're ingesting and then you have to watch what you're speaking.

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Because what you ingest, you then make a reality in your life through your speaking.

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Yeah.

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And so I have to, we have to be intentional in this season, not only with what we're seeing, what we're ingesting, what we're allowing through our ear gates and our eye gates, but also what are you letting out of your mouth?

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And who you letting it out to who are you letting out to?

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Talk about it.

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Because you we don't need to be talking to everybody about everything.

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Talk about it.

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You know what I'm saying?

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Because you're what you the response you get from other people is also going to impact how you hope.

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Because if if you're talking to people who have a low degree of hope, even if you have somewhat of a higher one, they can easily lower it.

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Right.

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And so you want to make sure that you're not, you know, what what you're talking about, what's going in, but who are you talking to and who are you allowing to respond back to what you're saying?

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I think you have to see every conversation that you have in this season.

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It is everybody is coming with a load.

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People are heavy.

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Yeah.

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People are heavy.

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People are heavy because of what's happening in the world.

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People are heavy because of what's happening in the world is definitely impacting what's happening in their life.

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And then when you think about people who are in leadership positions, and when we say leadership positions, I don't just mean titles, right?

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If you're a mother, a father, an uncle, an auntie, a sister, a brother, uh, a dad, a whatever it is, you have things and people and responsibilities that you are carrying.

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Yeah.

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Right.

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And if I'm taking what I'm carrying to somebody else, right, and I'm trying to maintain my hope about what I'm carrying, you have to be cognizant of if you're in relationships with people who are unloading on you and you don't have any return to give anything back to them.

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So now you're leaving these conversations heavier than what you let than what you came in with.

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Because now I'm trying to hope for my circumstance, but now I'm having to balance everything that you released onto me as well.

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And so when you're talking to people and you're engaging with people who are not actively pursuing hope, that's right.

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You know, the Bible says that you have to pursue peace, right?

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You have to pursue knowing that all will be well.

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You have to pursue believing that it's going to be okay.

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You have to pursue knowing that the things, the visions, the dreams, the aspirations, the ambitions, that those things can still come alive in your life.

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You have to pursue that.

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And when you are walking with people who are not pursuing the same thing you are, you will start pulling at each other because you're going in different directions.

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And so I just think now is such a pivotal time to check your circle.

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Right?

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Check it.

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Check it.

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Please check it.

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Check your crew.

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Please check it.

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Please check it.

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So before we get to Thanksgiving, all right.

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Challenge time, before we get to Thanksgiving, you need to do a crew check.

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And you need to say, oh, okay.

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Is this a push-pull relationship?

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Or is this a balancing relationship where we're always making sure the scales are even?

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Like, oh, I gave, I I I took too much over here.

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Let me let me let me balance it, right?

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You know, Ruth and I talk all the time, and there will be moments where it's a heavy day for me, and I'm just like, Ruth, heavy day for me, right?

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Um I'm going in.

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I it's it's a me day today, right?

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But when she comes with her me day, I don't sit there and be like, oh, but you know, I just really want to talk about me.

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No, because the scales in any relationship have to be balanced.

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Do a crew check, friends.

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Do a crew check.

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You know, let's be honest, y'all know who those people are.

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Y'all know who those people are in your life.

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Who when you talk, when you call them about you, they somehow always pivoted back to them.

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Y'all know, y'all know who it is.

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So don't be afraid.

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And I think one of the things that, you know, one of the things that Queen and I have have talked about, and I think as you get more settled in who you are, it's really not an age thing, it's more of just a mental stage thing.

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Like you begin to realize, you begin to put people in the right categories.

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So, so everybody who you talk to and hang out with isn't a friend.

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And I think, but it doesn't mean you can't connect with them, it can't be around them.

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Like, just don't put them in the friend category because a friend, I mean, for real, like you can't, you may not be a friend, but like it could be a solid connection, it could be a colleague, it could be an acquaintance, um, it could just be a casual, I'm cool with this person, but but but friend has some weight to it.

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And if you as a if that person can't hold weight with you, they're not a friend.

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And if they're not willing, if they're not willing to hold your weight the way you hold theirs, they're not a friend.

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So sometimes you just need to recategorize people and then meet them in the place that they actually are in your life, as opposed to expecting something that you consistently don't get.

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Man, let me tell you something because when we're talking about enduring leadership and when we're talking about this idea of maintaining hope, you have to talk about expectations.

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Yeah, you have to talk about how we have built our expectations around people, around uh success, expectations around fulfilling purpose, expectations around who's gonna show up, who's gonna be there, who's gonna, and we are building our expectations on false premises.

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Yeah, you know these people have been the same people the entire, you know what I'm saying?

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But you keep building expectations on on the sand.

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Yeah, you're building expectations on people who prove to you time after time after time again that when the rain comes, when the flood comes, they're gonna wash away.

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We're still building expectations that these people are gonna show up for us like I've envisioned in my mind that they would.

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We're still building expectations that things are gonna work out like I envisioned in my mind they would, and you leave no space for God to creatively bring something new in your life so that He can give you what you actually need because you keep trying to make what you already have your answer.

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Yeah.

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What you've been through, where you've been, and who you've had accompanying you up to this point is not the solution for where God is taking you.

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That's not the answer.

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Yeah.

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I'm not, and and I don't I don't want to be responsible.

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Don't don't be going around breaking up with people, telling people your friendships is over, and being like, well, Jaquita and Ruth Abigail was on the phone.

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Hold on, hold on.

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Yeah.

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Don't, don't, no, no, listen, listen, listen.

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And I and and there are great people in my life that I've had to learn where the weight shift.

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I've had to learn who can handle what.

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Right.

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I've had I've had to learn it.

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And they were really close to me, right?

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But I've had to learn, I don't, I can't, I can't, like how I'm sitting in this chair, right?

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I can't, I can't put my weight on you and do what I need to do because I go hard, right?

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And I need I need to know that if I'm if I'm in a vulnerable moment or if I'm in a moment where I really, you know, again, we're gonna talk about it.

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Enduring leadership means I'm gonna go through some, I'm gonna have some mountaintops, but I'm gonna show enough have some valleys.

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I'm gonna have some times where I'm climbing up and then I'm gonna have some times where I'm I'm sliding down the mountain.

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Like I ain't even mean to go down this fast.

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What happened?

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Right?

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I need, and I don't want the people, I I it's it's not about whether or not they can be a good friend or whether or not they can be in your life.

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It is about your expectations of who they're gonna be and what they're gonna do.

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Because I am a person of great hope, which means I get disappointed a lot or used to, because I would believe that the that the vision that I set in my head is exactly how things were gonna pan out.

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And I would hope for that vision.

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And when it didn't pan out the way I had hoped for, I was like, well, Lord, what happened?

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Right?

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I had to learn to reset my expectations and to start envisioning God coming through for me.

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Hey Larry.

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Hey Larry, um and Jeanne.

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I don't know if we acknowledge Janay.

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Hey Janay, hey, what up, right?

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Uh, as you guys are coming in, please say hello.

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We want to engage with you as much as we can on tonight, right?

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But when I started changing what I was setting my hope on to being God's words, God's promises, and not just the word in the Bible, but the word I was getting from my quiet time with God, the the and from my relationship with God, because I started to know God as a sustainer.

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I started to know God as a provider, I started to know God as a rock, right?

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I started to know God as a strong tower.

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And then once you know what you know about a person, you can set an expectation of that person.

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When I came to know God as a provider, I could set an expectation that God would provide.

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When I came to know that God was a sustainer and that he was my strength, when I got in hard times, I came to say, you know what?

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I can set my hope on who I know God to be.

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And that's the same thing I'm telling you to do with people in your life.

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Set your hope on who you know them to be.

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Yeah.

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Okay.

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Don't listen, y'all.

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You got to be real.

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Don't fool yourself.

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Um, who do you know this person to be?

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Who have they shown you to be?

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And and so as we're talking about this, and we're we're gonna keep talking about this in different ways.

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Let us know if you're feeling that.

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Let us know if you know you need to recategorize a person, drop it in the chat.

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If you know you need to recategorize somebody, drop it in the chat.

00:14:53.360 --> 00:14:54.960
Just an emoji if you got to.

00:14:55.360 --> 00:14:55.840
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:14:55.919 --> 00:14:57.120
Just put the emoji in the chat.

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You know what I'm saying?

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Um, and and that's it.

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And just let us know, like, hey, I probably need to reorganize, re-categorize my my uh my friend organizational chart.

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You know what I mean?

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Like you have the org chart.

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It's a re-org.

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You gotta re-org.

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It's a re-org, okay?

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It's gonna help you, and it's gonna help you to go into it.

00:15:16.639 --> 00:15:23.200
So one of the things that so like Quita was saying, like, we're talking about this idea of enduring leadership.

00:15:23.360 --> 00:15:25.600
One of the things I took thought about today, Quita.

00:15:25.840 --> 00:15:26.799
Um, I didn't tell you this.

00:15:27.840 --> 00:15:30.480
But uh is uh amen.

00:15:30.720 --> 00:15:30.960
I do.

00:15:31.039 --> 00:15:32.159
Thank you, Sebastian, for being real.

00:15:32.480 --> 00:15:34.000
Jehovah Gyra, Sebastian.

00:15:35.519 --> 00:15:36.159
I know that's right.

00:15:36.399 --> 00:15:37.039
Be real.

00:15:37.440 --> 00:15:42.879
Um when when leaders, when life happens to leaders, life happens to everyone around them.

00:15:42.960 --> 00:15:45.440
Well, jump on in there then and get in there.

00:15:46.000 --> 00:16:01.600
I I I realize like what one of the things what if if you will have any kind of leadership in your life, like you would have said was your family, community, you know, uh work, what whatever that whatever that space is for you.

00:16:02.399 --> 00:16:06.559
When life happens to you, it happens to everyone around you.

00:16:06.879 --> 00:16:07.120
Yeah.

00:16:07.360 --> 00:16:16.080
And so it is, and that can be very that can be very weighty, which again speaks to we gotta have the right people around us.

00:16:16.320 --> 00:16:21.840
Um that can be a very, very weighty feeling to know because some stuff, most stuff you can't control.

00:16:22.320 --> 00:16:25.120
Uh, we talk about all the time, like you can't control it.

00:16:25.360 --> 00:16:34.000
And you have, but you have a responsibility to keep moving forward because if you stop, the people, the people that are following you can stop.

00:16:34.320 --> 00:16:41.120
Um, and when you stop, the people that are moving uh and watching you, they can stop.

00:16:41.360 --> 00:16:48.240
And now they they're they are lost and they don't know where they're going, and they're not, you know, the moment their momentum can be paused.

00:16:48.480 --> 00:16:53.120
And you have to know that there really is a responsibility when it comes to leading.

00:16:53.440 --> 00:17:05.200
And I think that I think that as leaders and or people that are are are act are active in leadership, we have to understand what it takes to endure.

00:17:05.680 --> 00:17:06.000
Yeah.

00:17:06.319 --> 00:17:10.000
Not just for me, but for the people around me.

00:17:10.319 --> 00:17:11.119
It matters.

00:17:11.279 --> 00:17:15.440
And you we we can't, we don't have the luxury of just saying, I'm done.

00:17:15.759 --> 00:17:17.039
It doesn't work that way.

00:17:17.200 --> 00:17:33.680
Um, that is, and I think it's understanding how um what a what a high uh honor it is, but also how how how much of a responsibility it really is to say that I lead, you know.

00:17:33.839 --> 00:17:44.799
Um and and so to me, I think that uh what one of the things I the uh you know we follow a pastor uh that Pastor Darius Daniels.

00:17:45.279 --> 00:17:46.799
We followed him for a long time.

00:17:47.200 --> 00:17:48.160
We love Darius Daniels.

00:17:48.400 --> 00:17:49.279
We love Darius Daniels, yeah.

00:17:49.359 --> 00:17:52.079
If y'all, if y'all, if y'all don't know Darius Daniels, check him out.

00:17:52.160 --> 00:17:52.880
I'm telling you.

00:17:53.279 --> 00:17:54.799
He has this look, he has this series.

00:17:54.880 --> 00:17:56.960
I'm gonna do a quick plug because it's actually really good.

00:17:57.119 --> 00:18:00.160
He's doing a he's doing a series right now on a detox.

00:18:00.960 --> 00:18:06.319
Y'all, it's it's top notch, like top notch, detoxing basically your faith.

00:18:06.480 --> 00:18:07.440
It's great.

00:18:07.759 --> 00:18:15.200
Um so but one of the things that he talks about is this idea of what faith uh what strong faith really is.

00:18:15.440 --> 00:18:26.480
We think of strong faith a lot of times as the amount of faith we have, um, but strong faith is not about the amount of faith you have, strong faith is about the what he's the quality of faith that you have.

00:18:26.720 --> 00:18:31.359
And the quality of faith oftentimes is defined as how long you can have it.

00:18:32.559 --> 00:18:37.759
Oh so this idea of strong faith is really long faith.

00:18:38.000 --> 00:18:46.880
And so that's good, faith is in and what it takes, what it takes to endure, you have to have the faith to keep moving.

00:18:47.119 --> 00:18:52.559
Meaning you have to know that the next step is in front of you even when you don't see it.

00:18:53.119 --> 00:18:54.559
And you have to take it anyway.

00:18:55.279 --> 00:18:59.440
And as a leader, oftentimes you're the first one out, so you gotta take it.

00:19:00.880 --> 00:19:10.000
No matter what you feel, no matter how uncertain you are, uh, no matter what what has happened before in the past, no matter what your anxieties are, you gotta take it.

00:19:10.079 --> 00:19:16.319
And so you gotta and you have to keep taking it and keep taking it and keep taking it, and it doesn't stop.

00:19:16.480 --> 00:19:18.960
And I think that's one of the most exhausting things about leadership.

00:19:19.440 --> 00:19:21.039
This process never ends.

00:19:21.119 --> 00:19:24.400
Like, and it that does not end that that it just doesn't end.

00:19:24.559 --> 00:19:32.559
Like, and sometimes I'm like, yo, like I'm kind of tired, and I just kind of want it to be done, but it just isn't.

00:19:32.720 --> 00:19:41.039
And when you sign up for something that puts you in that kind of position, you sign up to endure, and endurance is really, really hard.

00:19:41.279 --> 00:19:47.599
Well, I think, hey J and Ashley, thank y'all for coming to the live and all the friends.

00:19:48.720 --> 00:19:49.359
Yeah.

00:19:49.759 --> 00:19:55.039
Um, you know, I think that there's something to be said about the journey of a leader, right?

00:19:55.279 --> 00:20:04.240
And and there is this idea of leadership, right, where everyone sees the glory of it, but not everybody sees the pain of it.

00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:10.640
No, right, not every not everybody sees the struggle that it took for you to get to the platform.

00:20:10.799 --> 00:20:13.839
They just see how great you are once you get there, right?

00:20:14.079 --> 00:20:17.440
But a leader does not get to ignore the pain.

00:20:17.599 --> 00:20:21.519
You have to go through the pain in order to get to the glory.

00:20:21.680 --> 00:20:27.359
And a lot of times when we get in painful moments, that pain can become paralyzing.

00:20:27.599 --> 00:20:33.920
That pain, you have to know, guys, we we stress on the podcast constantly, self-awareness.

00:20:34.240 --> 00:20:42.720
You have to know what your natural response or what your uh what your adapted response to stress is.

00:20:43.039 --> 00:20:47.920
You have to know when you get to seasons of overwhelm, yeah, how do you respond?

00:20:48.079 --> 00:20:48.319
Right?

00:20:48.480 --> 00:20:54.240
I know for me, when I get to seasons of overwhelm, my productivity is down.

00:20:54.799 --> 00:20:55.599
We're low.

00:20:55.759 --> 00:20:56.640
Okay, right.

00:20:56.799 --> 00:21:00.400
And I know that I will stop performing if I'm overwhelmed.

00:21:00.480 --> 00:21:07.839
And so I because I know that about myself, I'll start catching it and I'll start saying, okay, how can I delegate this differently?

00:21:08.000 --> 00:21:10.160
How can I structure my life differently?

00:21:10.400 --> 00:21:14.720
Because I'm a leader, I don't get to skip past the pain.

00:21:14.960 --> 00:21:18.079
I don't get to pretend like my life is not what it is.

00:21:18.240 --> 00:21:18.640
Man, look.

00:21:18.880 --> 00:21:26.240
And more so because I'm a leader, I know that the way that I walk through my season, I'm teaching somebody else how to walk through theirs.

00:21:26.799 --> 00:21:30.480
I know that even without me saying a word, somebody is watching.

00:21:31.359 --> 00:21:31.920
You're being watched.

00:21:32.160 --> 00:21:42.799
And what I'm what I want to tell everyone watching us, whether you're watching live or whether you're watching the recording, is that there is somebody that is watching how you go through painful seasons.

00:21:44.000 --> 00:21:47.759
There's somebody that is learning endurance through your journey.

00:21:47.920 --> 00:21:48.319
Yes.

00:21:48.480 --> 00:21:54.319
There is somebody that's learning how faith operates by watching you go through hard times.

00:21:54.799 --> 00:22:04.559
There is somebody that has been made privy to your journey simply for the fact that they need that information for whatever's going to come next in their life.

00:22:04.880 --> 00:22:09.759
And I know that all of us are not driven by that responsibility, and I get that, right?

00:22:10.000 --> 00:22:16.880
But you have to know, I think sometimes we think we're in it by ourselves, and we think that nobody sees us.

00:22:17.039 --> 00:22:27.759
But what I'm telling you is that everybody, if you've been drawn to this podcast, you are a person who is a lighthouse in the middle of a river, in the middle of an ocean, right?

00:22:27.920 --> 00:22:32.799
And there is somebody who needs your light in order to pass through the waters.

00:22:33.119 --> 00:22:39.200
And it took you a lot to get to that point, and it took you a lot to find your light to even turn it on.

00:22:39.359 --> 00:22:42.319
But I'm telling you that that light is not just for you.

00:22:42.480 --> 00:22:42.960
Man, look.

00:22:43.200 --> 00:22:57.680
The hope you find in this season, your ability to endure and push past obstacles and push past challenges, what you are what you are pressing through right now in the seasons, generations after us will write about.

00:22:57.839 --> 00:22:58.079
Yeah.

00:22:58.319 --> 00:23:00.799
Generations after us will acknowledge you.

00:23:00.960 --> 00:23:08.000
There is somebody, you know, I talk all the time about how what what my great-great-grandchildren, they're gonna be like, well, you know, Grandma Quita, you know.

00:23:08.240 --> 00:23:11.680
She always said, you know, I I want to be remembered.

00:23:11.920 --> 00:23:29.680
Well, in Greenville, we had a um, we had a legend just passed um in the Greenville community, and people are writing posts about how they remember how committed she was to her community, how how um how much she cared and and took care of everybody around her.

00:23:29.839 --> 00:23:36.079
People who didn't even know her, I didn't know this woman until I saw how many people were writing about her.

00:23:36.480 --> 00:23:36.720
Right?

00:23:36.880 --> 00:23:43.440
She didn't know that she she knew she had some impact, but I'm pretty sure she didn't know that one day she would touch my life.

00:23:43.920 --> 00:23:44.319
Right?

00:23:44.640 --> 00:23:47.440
Your story is gonna touch lives of people you never meet.

00:23:47.599 --> 00:23:48.319
Hey, Sharonda.

00:23:48.480 --> 00:23:49.599
Hey, Sharonda.

00:23:49.839 --> 00:23:50.160
Right.

00:23:50.240 --> 00:23:54.160
Your story is gonna touch the lives of people you'll never get to meet.

00:23:54.400 --> 00:24:01.440
What you do in this season of your life, it will make a difference for people that you may never ask to hear it from.

00:24:01.839 --> 00:24:02.240
Absolutely.

00:24:02.480 --> 00:24:02.720
Right?

00:24:02.960 --> 00:24:11.359
It makes a difference, and I don't want you to think that you making it through this time or making it through this season is of no consequence.

00:24:11.680 --> 00:24:12.079
Right?

00:24:12.160 --> 00:24:19.119
I even me hearing about your victory, that might be the thing that pushes me to get to my next stage or my next level.

00:24:19.359 --> 00:24:19.680
That's right.

00:24:19.839 --> 00:24:22.400
You don't have to be on a platform to make a difference.

00:24:22.640 --> 00:24:24.799
You don't, you just have to keep going.

00:24:26.480 --> 00:24:28.960
Listen, you just gotta keep going, guys.

00:24:29.599 --> 00:24:30.559
Keep going.

00:24:31.359 --> 00:24:32.880
Just keep you have to keep going.

00:24:33.119 --> 00:24:39.839
Um, you know, I think I think something we need to acknowledge, Queen, is that one of the things that makes us want to stop is when we make mistakes.

00:24:40.079 --> 00:24:42.319
Um and I hate making mistakes.

00:24:42.720 --> 00:24:47.279
If somebody else hate making mistakes, if you hate making mistakes, it's the public ones that other people.

00:24:47.440 --> 00:24:48.640
Oh my gosh, that everybody's seeing that.

00:24:48.880 --> 00:24:51.920
Or like somebody pointed out, like, hey, you know you ain't do that right, right?

00:24:52.400 --> 00:24:56.880
Like, why don't you just yeah, why don't you just yeah, yeah, keep that to yourself.

00:24:56.960 --> 00:24:57.359
Yeah, yeah.

00:24:57.440 --> 00:25:03.119
If you if you don't feel that if y'all hate making mistakes, or if you can admit, yeah, I done made some mistakes, go and put that in the chat.

00:25:03.200 --> 00:25:15.279
I like I I often I had a moment last week, I want to start maybe a couple of weeks ago, where I was I was talking with my husband and I was just like, I um I don't know if I'm cut out for this.

00:25:18.079 --> 00:25:22.559
Like I just I felt like I kept doing the same wrong thing over and over.

00:25:23.200 --> 00:25:28.319
And it was it wasn't it wasn't it wasn't uh on purpose, like it wasn't intentional.

00:25:28.400 --> 00:25:31.839
It was just like I just felt like I just couldn't get it right.

00:25:32.319 --> 00:25:36.000
And it really was it was kind of debilitating in the moment.

00:25:36.079 --> 00:25:45.200
It took me a couple of days to move through it, but I didn't like I just I had I went all the way to I just must not be cut out for this.

00:25:45.359 --> 00:25:48.000
Like I can't, I'm not gonna say, hey, what's up, Emmanuel?

00:25:48.160 --> 00:25:59.359
Um and I I really so I think making mistakes is a reality, and um, and we have to acknowledge that sometimes that can be a thing that slows us down.

00:25:59.680 --> 00:26:01.200
Uh and and I think the theory.

00:26:01.359 --> 00:26:02.319
But here's the thing.

00:26:02.559 --> 00:26:04.160
Can I can I cut in real quick?

00:26:04.400 --> 00:26:04.720
Sure.

00:26:04.880 --> 00:26:05.920
Just with one quick thing.

00:26:06.079 --> 00:26:11.359
It's not the mistake that's holding you back, it's how you process the mistake.

00:26:11.599 --> 00:26:12.960
It is holding you back.

00:26:13.279 --> 00:26:15.279
It is, it's how you processed it.

00:26:15.759 --> 00:26:17.839
And but well, we'll get to that later.

00:26:18.000 --> 00:26:27.200
But like I think uh I but yes, it's how you processed it because mistakes are meant to you use mistakes either to keep to keep you down or to move you forward.

00:26:27.519 --> 00:26:41.680
And so if you're processing the mistake that you've made um as something that's debilitating and you're seeing as like, I made a mistake, so therefore I can't move forward, that is a different way of looking at it of I made a mistake, how can I move forward?

00:26:41.920 --> 00:26:46.079
That there you you have to have it is it really is taking on a totally different mentality.

00:26:46.960 --> 00:27:03.119
And one of the things though that has helped me, uh, hey Jessica, um and I I think that one of the things that has helped me to move through mistakes is understanding this very important thing, right?

00:27:03.519 --> 00:27:10.079
Um that oftentimes mistakes are not how I don't want to say this.

00:27:11.200 --> 00:27:15.680
Sometimes the the you can see, especially as leaders, you can see where you want to go.

00:27:16.480 --> 00:27:19.440
You can see the vision, you can see the outcome that you want.

00:27:20.240 --> 00:27:28.960
And believing that just because you can see the outcome doesn't mean that you won't make mistakes.

00:27:29.279 --> 00:27:32.000
And it also doesn't mean that that outcome isn't coming.

00:27:32.720 --> 00:27:37.599
Mistakes don't mistakes don't uh nullify the outcome.

00:27:38.240 --> 00:27:45.039
They just that honestly, if you have the right mentality towards mistakes, it will push you closer to it.

00:27:45.279 --> 00:27:50.079
Because the thing that you're learning is the thing you need in order to get closer to your outcome.

00:27:50.319 --> 00:27:50.720
Yeah.

00:27:50.960 --> 00:27:52.079
You have to learn.

00:27:52.400 --> 00:28:00.720
I think when we were uh when we were doing the pre-work for today, we talked about how your confidence in the outcome does not exempt you from mistakes along the way.

00:28:00.880 --> 00:28:01.200
Correct.

00:28:01.359 --> 00:28:01.599
Right?

00:28:01.680 --> 00:28:10.240
Like even though you can still have faith that you are going to accomplish that thing, you are you are going to make it happen, you're gonna push through, right?

00:28:10.319 --> 00:28:16.880
And and our confidence keeps us going, but our confidence does not prevent us from doing the wrong thing.

00:28:17.359 --> 00:28:17.440
Right.

00:28:17.519 --> 00:28:29.279
That's you know, when I uh when I finally, after 12 years after getting my MDV, when I finally got uh uh surrendered to the Lord and got licensed as a minister, it took me 12 years, but that that's between me and the Lord.

00:28:29.440 --> 00:28:31.599
But uh not anymore, you just confessed.

00:28:31.680 --> 00:28:32.319
Go ahead.

00:28:32.559 --> 00:28:34.640
Yeah, yeah, no, I just told the whole world.

00:28:34.720 --> 00:28:37.359
But that's also okay, we cheers in now though.

00:28:37.599 --> 00:28:38.400
That's right, Cleita.

00:28:38.559 --> 00:28:38.720
That's right.

00:28:39.440 --> 00:28:40.160
That's right.

00:28:40.559 --> 00:28:50.160
But when I was in my pre-work for getting licensing, licensed, I sat down with my leader, and that was that's the one thing she told me that I remember.

00:28:50.319 --> 00:28:51.920
She was like, You're gonna make mistakes.

00:28:52.079 --> 00:29:04.240
And I was like, you know, you're called, you're anointed, you're gifted, you got strengths, you got you got talents, you got all of that, right?

00:29:04.480 --> 00:29:09.680
You have the capacity to succeed in what God has set you to do, right?

00:29:09.839 --> 00:29:15.119
That the path for you getting from your beginning to your end, it's already laid out.

00:29:15.440 --> 00:29:25.039
On along that path, you will veer off, you will do the wrong thing sometimes, you will forget something one time, you will say the wrong thing.

00:29:25.200 --> 00:29:28.160
My Lord, you're gonna say you will say the wrong thing.

00:29:28.240 --> 00:29:29.920
It'll go ahead and settle it.

00:29:30.160 --> 00:29:30.640
It will happen.

00:29:30.720 --> 00:29:30.880
Absolutely.

00:29:31.200 --> 00:29:34.400
You're gonna have to repent, and not just to the Lord, y'all.

00:29:34.480 --> 00:29:36.799
Something I had to unlearn recently, y'all.

00:29:36.880 --> 00:29:38.319
This is the unlearned podcast.

00:29:38.559 --> 00:29:41.519
And we are one thing I had to unlearn recently.

00:29:41.680 --> 00:29:45.279
Um, I did something and I knew I was wrong.

00:29:45.519 --> 00:29:46.079
I was wrong.

00:29:46.160 --> 00:29:49.279
I ain't even gonna get into all the details, but I did something, I knew I was wrong.

00:29:49.440 --> 00:29:50.880
So I went, I repented to the Lord.

00:29:50.960 --> 00:29:52.240
I said, Lord, I'm sorry.

00:29:52.400 --> 00:29:55.920
I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that, and Lord, I ain't gonna do it again.

00:29:56.000 --> 00:29:59.680
And and but something in my conscience said, You ain't do it to the Lord.

00:30:00.079 --> 00:30:00.960
You did it to your friend.

00:30:01.200 --> 00:30:01.519
That's it.

00:30:01.680 --> 00:30:03.039
And so I had to call my friend.

00:30:03.119 --> 00:30:04.640
And it was a funny thing, right?

00:30:05.039 --> 00:30:09.279
I still had to call and be like, girl, I am so sorry.

00:30:09.519 --> 00:30:11.200
Okay, but this is what I did.

00:30:11.359 --> 00:30:12.559
And she laughed.

00:30:12.720 --> 00:30:16.480
But as soon as I did it, I felt the hope of my future coming back.

00:30:17.039 --> 00:30:21.200
Because when you when you have, here's the thing.

00:30:21.440 --> 00:30:25.119
We make mistakes, and there's nothing wrong with making the mistakes.

00:30:25.279 --> 00:30:29.920
We don't put in the necessary energy to recover from the mistake.

00:30:30.240 --> 00:30:30.559
Yes.

00:30:30.720 --> 00:30:30.960
Right?

00:30:31.200 --> 00:30:35.680
You did something wrong, whether intentionally or unintentionally, it was wrong.

00:30:35.920 --> 00:30:36.240
Right?

00:30:36.319 --> 00:30:38.720
You you did something in error, right?

00:30:38.880 --> 00:30:40.240
It had an impact.

00:30:40.400 --> 00:30:40.640
Right?

00:30:40.720 --> 00:30:41.920
You didn't answer that email.

00:30:42.000 --> 00:30:43.200
I'm talking to myself now.

00:30:43.359 --> 00:30:45.440
You didn't answer that email from a month ago.

00:30:45.519 --> 00:30:46.799
And now you're coming back in.

00:30:46.880 --> 00:30:47.759
You gotta make that right.

00:30:47.920 --> 00:30:48.480
Yes, you do.

00:30:48.640 --> 00:30:50.400
You can't just hope that they figured it out.

00:30:50.559 --> 00:30:51.039
Make that right.

00:30:51.200 --> 00:30:52.079
Make it right, Jacqueline.

00:30:53.200 --> 00:30:55.440
You have to recover well.

00:30:55.759 --> 00:31:00.079
You gotta bounce back, and then you have to go and you gotta make it right.

00:31:00.160 --> 00:31:00.400
Yeah.

00:31:00.559 --> 00:31:02.079
That's the work of a leader.

00:31:02.240 --> 00:31:07.920
The work of a leader is not just to tell people what to do, it is not just to say, hey guys, won't let you know.

00:31:08.079 --> 00:31:10.960
All right, this is the vision and we're going forward, right?

00:31:11.119 --> 00:31:12.960
That's not the real work of the leader.

00:31:13.519 --> 00:31:14.400
It's not the only work.

00:31:14.559 --> 00:31:15.279
It's not the only work.

00:31:16.000 --> 00:31:16.720
Okay, thank you.

00:31:16.880 --> 00:31:18.960
It's not the only work of a leader.

00:31:19.119 --> 00:31:31.440
The the the some of the most important work that a leader will do will happen in those one-on-one conversations when you tell somebody, hey, I was wrong, and we're gonna pivot.

00:31:31.599 --> 00:31:32.960
We're gonna shift.

00:31:33.200 --> 00:31:35.200
And I need to make this right with you.

00:31:35.359 --> 00:31:35.599
Yes.

00:31:37.119 --> 00:31:44.559
Some of the the greatest moments I've seen from leaders that I respect the most are the ones where they came and apologized to the people.

00:31:44.720 --> 00:31:45.279
Man, look.

00:31:45.599 --> 00:31:47.200
Where they came and made it right.

00:31:47.359 --> 00:31:47.599
Yes.

00:31:47.839 --> 00:31:57.279
And as a leader, whether you are a leader in your household, a leader on your job, a leader in your church, a leader in if you a leader on the playground, I don't care.

00:31:57.519 --> 00:32:01.039
There will be moments where you have to go and make something right.

00:32:01.279 --> 00:32:01.680
You will.

00:32:01.839 --> 00:32:03.200
You'll have to make it right.

00:32:03.440 --> 00:32:10.720
And I think also, I I think I I have had more than a few of the make it right moments as a leader.

00:32:10.880 --> 00:32:11.839
My goodness.

00:32:12.160 --> 00:32:18.160
But what the thing that I have to always, I also have to remember is uh what the best apology is change behavior.

00:32:18.480 --> 00:32:22.480
So you don't want to keep coming and making the same thing right over and over again.

00:32:22.799 --> 00:32:24.720
Girl, I'm sorry again, my bad.

00:32:24.880 --> 00:32:25.920
I'm right now.

00:32:26.480 --> 00:32:28.799
It's like, yo, like we're gonna keep doing this.

00:32:28.960 --> 00:32:32.559
You you really have to make an effort towards the actual change.

00:32:32.720 --> 00:32:51.279
And it doesn't, it doesn't mean that you you won't make the mistake again, but understanding that as a leader, it is important to take that and then continue to grow in who you are so that that doesn't become that is no longer a part of what you do as a person.

00:32:51.440 --> 00:32:51.759
Yeah.

00:32:51.920 --> 00:32:56.319
Um, and so that is uh I think, and again, that is incumbent upon.

00:32:56.400 --> 00:33:04.319
I would say that even before the work, uh the work of a leader is with uh yourself before it's with other people.

00:33:04.559 --> 00:33:14.960
Um you you you must you must understand how to move yourself before you can think to move others.

00:33:15.200 --> 00:33:34.079
And if you aren't doing that, right, if you keep breaking promises to yourself, if you keep telling yourself that you are um going to you know do something you said, and oh, I keep if you keep trying to, if you keep making it right with you over and over and over again, you you wait a minute, Ruth.

00:33:34.319 --> 00:33:37.920
You are going to have trouble with other people.

00:33:38.240 --> 00:33:40.640
Because Ruth be acting like she ain't stepping on toes.

00:33:40.799 --> 00:33:41.359
Oh, I'm sorry.

00:33:41.839 --> 00:33:43.599
You break your promises to yourself.

00:33:43.680 --> 00:33:48.480
My first thought was the gym, you know, because I had some promises I made to myself about that gym.

00:33:48.640 --> 00:33:52.079
You know, I was during the summer three times a week, I was faithful.

00:33:52.240 --> 00:33:54.000
Then I was like, hey, let's take that down to two.

00:33:54.079 --> 00:33:56.960
Now I'll be like, let me slide in, you know what I'm saying?

00:33:57.039 --> 00:33:59.279
I'm gonna slide up in there real quick.

00:33:59.519 --> 00:34:03.359
And now I'll be like, hey, you know, it is in the gym understand.

00:34:03.519 --> 00:34:06.799
The gym don't but gym really ain't worried about you for it.

00:34:07.039 --> 00:34:08.400
You're breaking promises to yourself.

00:34:08.480 --> 00:34:13.679
I'm sorry, I just feel it in my spirit, so I'm gonna say it, and whoever it's for, go ahead and catch it.

00:34:13.840 --> 00:34:17.679
You breaking promises to yourself about what you said you was gonna do with that relationship.

00:34:17.920 --> 00:34:19.119
Oh, yeah.

00:34:19.199 --> 00:34:25.760
You broke some promises to yourself, not promises to them, not promises to your mama, your daddy, your spiritual covering.

00:34:25.920 --> 00:34:30.960
You broke a promise to yourself when you said you was gonna break something off and then do it.

00:34:31.199 --> 00:34:35.840
You broke a promise to yourself when you said you wasn't going back and then you did.

00:34:35.920 --> 00:34:36.320
Uh-oh.

00:34:36.559 --> 00:34:48.400
Now, these when we're talking about endurance, yeah, and we're talking about having faith to move forward and having the hope to be able to see a version of ourselves that we haven't seen yet, right?

00:34:48.559 --> 00:35:02.400
But there is something, and you have to be able to identify what is it that is holding me back from moving forward, because there is an invisible force that every time I try to move forward is pulling me back.

00:35:02.559 --> 00:35:04.960
And some of it is your broken promises.

00:35:05.280 --> 00:35:05.840
That's it.

00:35:06.079 --> 00:35:11.519
You have you you you are um you are the first person you lead.

00:35:11.679 --> 00:35:12.400
We say it all the time.

00:35:12.559 --> 00:35:13.840
You're the first person you lead.

00:35:14.000 --> 00:35:15.519
And if you say that, that's good.

00:35:15.679 --> 00:35:17.199
Oh, we don't say it all the time.

00:35:17.280 --> 00:35:17.599
You know what?

00:35:17.920 --> 00:35:19.039
I I say that, you know what?

00:35:19.119 --> 00:35:20.800
That's actually that in the chat.

00:35:21.039 --> 00:35:22.400
You are the first person you lead.

00:35:23.599 --> 00:35:25.840
That's actually one of the values we have at Angel Street.

00:35:25.920 --> 00:35:28.079
Like you, you, you, you lead yourself first.

00:35:28.320 --> 00:35:29.280
Okay, Angel Street.

00:35:29.360 --> 00:35:31.679
Somebody make sure y'all tag Angel Street in the credit.

00:35:31.920 --> 00:35:32.800
That's so my bad.

00:35:32.880 --> 00:35:34.719
I I got organizations confused.

00:35:34.960 --> 00:35:49.920
But um, I I I think that uh what the thing that I also think is so important for us to uh be able to say is even in the midst of mistakes, your humanity does not trump God's sovereignty at the end of the day.

00:35:50.639 --> 00:35:53.119
Your humanity cannot trump God's sovereignty.

00:35:53.360 --> 00:35:53.840
My Lord.

00:35:54.079 --> 00:35:56.559
So there is grace for your mistakes.

00:35:57.199 --> 00:36:03.599
And understand that in if you know we're human, we're gonna do the things we're saying let's not do.

00:36:03.840 --> 00:36:04.719
It's gonna happen.

00:36:04.880 --> 00:36:14.079
Like you just you have to you the the thing that I appreciate, one of the things that my father taught us uh growing up is the art of the rebound.

00:36:14.239 --> 00:36:18.320
And so um in basketball, I know I've talked about this on the podcast before.

00:36:18.480 --> 00:36:35.679
Um in basketball, the best, the the the one of the things that team that offensive teams have to always learn how to do is to be able to rebound because you are most you're likely to make the shot, you give yourself another chance, essentially, right?

00:36:35.840 --> 00:36:38.079
So you make the shot, you shoot the shot, you miss it.

00:36:38.400 --> 00:36:41.920
But if you don't hustle for the rebound, you can't get the next chance.

00:36:42.079 --> 00:36:46.400
So the question is how quickly, how quickly are you trying to get your rebound, right?

00:36:46.559 --> 00:36:48.639
Which is how quickly you stay in the game.

00:36:48.800 --> 00:36:55.360
But if you just lean back, take a shot, lean back, oh man, I missed it, and then just go back down the court, you're missing opportunities to score.

00:36:55.679 --> 00:36:57.280
Wait a minute, that's good.

00:36:57.440 --> 00:36:59.679
Y'all better catch them rebounds.

00:36:59.920 --> 00:37:11.920
And I I like it because when we miss a shot, meaning when we make a mistake or when we get off course, right, and we feel like we've missed something, you stay in that moment of shame and guilt.

00:37:12.079 --> 00:37:16.880
Yes, right, right, and it prevents you from hustling and saying, it is so simple.

00:37:17.039 --> 00:37:21.920
When God is looking at our past and our lives, he's not like, dang it, they missed that shot.

00:37:22.000 --> 00:37:22.800
There goes the game.

00:37:23.199 --> 00:37:24.480
That's right, that's right, that's right.

00:37:24.800 --> 00:37:29.199
That there is a there is another opportunity that I got a plan B.

00:37:29.360 --> 00:37:36.320
I wasn't worried about plan A because I already had plan B in the chamber, but you gotta hustle and go get the ball again.

00:37:36.480 --> 00:37:38.960
Yeah, you gotta put in the effort to try again.

00:37:39.119 --> 00:37:39.440
That's right.

00:37:39.599 --> 00:37:49.920
You gotta uh, I'm thinking of Peter on the boat, Jesus coming, they have been fishing all night, you know, and Jesus comes, preaches from the boat, and then he says, let down the nets on the right side.

00:37:50.079 --> 00:37:57.039
You know, Peter could have been like, hey, listen, I didn't have the tried, done it, we've been down this road, been out here all night.

00:37:57.360 --> 00:37:58.960
I ain't got time for all of that.

00:37:59.199 --> 00:38:05.360
Yeah, but and it's in the hustle, it was in the attempt that they found the blessing.

00:38:05.519 --> 00:38:13.840
And some of us have shot the ball a couple of times and missed, and we've lost our hustle because we don't believe that we'll we'll make it in the next time.

00:38:14.000 --> 00:38:30.639
Man, look, and but you are in a season where if you have been walking with God in this season, where you've been allowing God to show you you, you've been allowing God to speak into your life, you've been allowing God to give you vision and dream and hope and and and purpose again.

00:38:30.880 --> 00:38:34.400
When he comes this time and says, Now let him down.

00:38:34.559 --> 00:38:36.000
Yeah, now shoot the shot.

00:38:36.079 --> 00:38:38.880
Yeah, now do it because I'm on the boat, right?

00:38:39.119 --> 00:38:42.480
Get Jesus in your boat, put him in your hustle.

00:38:42.639 --> 00:38:45.840
Make y'all make your faith part of your hustle.

00:38:46.000 --> 00:38:46.400
That's right.

00:38:46.559 --> 00:38:46.800
Right?

00:38:46.880 --> 00:38:49.760
Get up in the morning, encourage yourself with the word of God.

00:38:49.920 --> 00:38:53.679
It don't matter if you can sing on key, get up and sing a song to the Lord.

00:38:53.840 --> 00:38:55.760
Well, by yourself.

00:38:55.840 --> 00:38:57.280
Don't you have to do it in front of everybody else.

00:38:58.159 --> 00:38:58.480
Don't do that.

00:38:58.719 --> 00:38:59.280
Please don't do that.

00:38:59.360 --> 00:38:59.840
Please don't do that.

00:39:00.639 --> 00:39:00.960
Please don't do that.

00:39:03.840 --> 00:39:04.400
I very much care.

00:39:05.440 --> 00:39:05.760
I care.

00:39:06.320 --> 00:39:06.880
I care a lot.

00:39:07.199 --> 00:39:10.400
But but seriously, you gotta hustle with faith.

00:39:10.559 --> 00:39:12.719
You gotta hustle and say, Oh, I ain't make it that time.

00:39:12.800 --> 00:39:20.480
But I bet if I if I figure it out because I believe who God said I am, greater is he that is in me than he that is in the world, and shoot it again.

00:39:20.719 --> 00:39:25.280
You gotta hustle, but this time make sure Jesus is on your boat when you let down that net.

00:39:25.840 --> 00:39:34.000
What one of the things, um, I remember one of my uh students at Angel Street, she did a presentation at her school, and um this, but it's made me so proud.

00:39:34.079 --> 00:39:51.119
She's a she was a junior last year's senior this year, but she was doing it as a junior, and one of the things she talked about was the way that she has navigated mistakes and how when she was in ninth or tenth grade, that whenever she makes a mistake, it used to take her like a week to recover.

00:39:51.280 --> 00:39:53.119
And she said, now it takes me a day.

00:39:53.840 --> 00:39:54.320
That's nasty.

00:39:54.559 --> 00:39:55.199
That's good.

00:39:55.519 --> 00:39:58.719
That right there, and she's she's 17 years old.

00:39:58.880 --> 00:40:03.440
Um, she said, and what I went from a week to a day, and like now I get back.

00:40:03.519 --> 00:40:05.280
That is what's called recovery.

00:40:05.360 --> 00:40:14.719
You you you have to shorten your recovery path because you can't, you don't have the you don't have the luxury again as a leader, you do not have the luxury of staying down that long.

00:40:14.880 --> 00:40:16.480
Now that might be where you where you are.

00:40:16.639 --> 00:40:17.760
We're looking for growth.

00:40:17.920 --> 00:40:21.840
You don't have to there's no shame in where you are right now, yeah.

00:40:22.000 --> 00:40:23.119
But what's the growth?

00:40:23.199 --> 00:40:27.039
What how are you moving closer to a shorter recovery period?

00:40:27.199 --> 00:40:32.960
And how are you how are you how are you moving closer to getting your rebound?

00:40:33.119 --> 00:40:35.039
Like that is that is important.

00:40:35.199 --> 00:40:39.840
And so when she said that, man, I really it almost brought tears to my eyes, honestly.

00:40:39.920 --> 00:40:42.480
I've known this girl since she was eight years old.

00:40:42.800 --> 00:40:49.599
And um, and you know, what we do, Angel Street, we learn music, and a lot of times the music is it can be a little challenging.

00:40:49.760 --> 00:40:51.440
And I remember when she was shut down.

00:40:51.519 --> 00:40:56.800
I think Sebastian in here said one of the things that she does is she'll shut down when things get when when when it gets too hard.

00:40:57.119 --> 00:41:04.800
Like, um, I I remember when she was shut down, and I remember she couldn't get apart and she would just sometimes she just leave the room.

00:41:05.039 --> 00:41:08.800
But when she said, it used to take me a week, now it takes me a day.

00:41:09.039 --> 00:41:12.639
I said, Man, look at that'll preach all day long right there.

00:41:13.119 --> 00:41:22.639
If if nothing, if I if we didn't, if we didn't help, if we don't help to people to do anything else, if we can help people to recover faster, shorten your recovery time.

00:41:23.039 --> 00:41:24.159
Shorten that recovery time.

00:41:24.400 --> 00:41:28.320
Yo, that is so, man, let me tell you something.

00:41:28.559 --> 00:41:38.800
That is so good because the shorter, if the game is only an hour long, if you're shortening your recovery time, you're getting more opportunities to score.

00:41:39.360 --> 00:41:44.559
And it's not the people who play the game better that win, it's the people who learn how to recover.

00:41:44.719 --> 00:41:49.679
That's bet come on, look, it's seriously, rebounds and free throws win the game.

00:41:50.480 --> 00:41:54.800
If you rebound, you get second and third chances that the other team done get.

00:41:55.039 --> 00:41:57.840
And free throws, don't miss easy opportunities, guys.

00:41:58.320 --> 00:42:05.599
Like, don't don't miss, don't you gotta practice when nobody's in front of you because you have to get it right.

00:42:05.679 --> 00:42:10.239
A free throw, y'all know basketball, but when you when you have a free throw, nobody's blocking you.

00:42:10.800 --> 00:42:18.000
You gotta get that, like put don't, don't practice as much as when nobody's watching you.

00:42:18.239 --> 00:42:21.760
Practice as much as when nobody's covering you as when they are.

00:42:22.559 --> 00:42:26.239
Because you wanna you wanna make you wanna get those quick wins.

00:42:26.320 --> 00:42:37.920
It helps you to stay encouraged, it helps you to stay hopeful for you to win, for you to get those easy wins so that when it gets hard, you have the energy to try to recover quickly.

00:42:38.159 --> 00:42:43.360
Like that is part of what leadership is, and it's part of how you want to endure.

00:42:43.760 --> 00:42:46.800
And it and it doesn't stop, it really doesn't stop.

00:42:47.199 --> 00:42:48.159
Welcome back, Sebastian.

00:42:48.239 --> 00:42:48.960
We're glad you're back.

00:42:49.199 --> 00:42:52.400
Welcome back, and I saw Jessica say great convo, ladies.

00:42:52.480 --> 00:42:53.119
Thank you, Jessica.

00:42:53.280 --> 00:42:53.920
Thank you, Jessica.

00:42:54.159 --> 00:43:03.760
Listen, we out here, we're out here just giving y'all the lessons we've learned along the way, and some new stuff is coming out today because I'm over here getting encouraged all over again.

00:43:04.000 --> 00:43:04.159
Listen.

00:43:04.559 --> 00:43:07.039
Okay, man, because it's hard out here, man.

00:43:07.119 --> 00:43:08.480
Like, literally, I don't lie.

00:43:08.719 --> 00:43:13.199
Like, I I am sometimes like I wish, I'm not, I'm just gonna be honest.

00:43:13.360 --> 00:43:16.480
I was like, man, y'all can have this leadership stuff, man.

00:43:16.639 --> 00:43:18.960
Y'all can have this leadership stuff, y'all can have it.

00:43:19.119 --> 00:43:19.840
You can have it.

00:43:20.239 --> 00:43:21.519
Like, I'm I'm really cool.

00:43:21.599 --> 00:43:23.679
Like, just I just I just want to clock in somewhere.

00:43:23.840 --> 00:43:29.039
Like, just somebody give me a job I can clock in at because honestly, because it'd be hard.

00:43:29.280 --> 00:43:31.679
I think about going to work at Sephora all the time.

00:43:31.840 --> 00:43:32.800
It'd be hard.

00:43:35.519 --> 00:43:36.400
You so pretty.

00:43:40.880 --> 00:43:43.119
Man, look, I'll be an excellent employee.

00:43:43.280 --> 00:43:43.599
Excellent.

00:43:44.079 --> 00:43:45.280
What you talking about the best.

00:43:45.440 --> 00:43:46.639
What you talking?

00:43:46.800 --> 00:43:47.039
Okay.

00:43:47.440 --> 00:43:50.159
I get my check and I ain't gotta think about where it's coming from.

00:43:50.400 --> 00:43:51.039
Shoot.

00:43:51.599 --> 00:43:54.960
Listen, that's not like we're tapping.

00:43:55.840 --> 00:43:56.880
I just haven't agree.

00:43:57.599 --> 00:43:58.559
You wanna know what's funny?

00:43:58.639 --> 00:44:04.079
Is me and uh I'm in a PhD program, friends, and uh that that wasn't said to boast.

00:44:04.159 --> 00:44:12.960
It was said to uh to ask the intercessors and all those who know the Lord to pray um and to keep me lifted before the Lord as I continue on this journey.

00:44:13.199 --> 00:44:21.760
Um, but what me and one my another one of my friends was in the program together, we say all the time, listen, retire me, okay?

00:44:21.920 --> 00:44:24.639
I'm not in this program to get a higher level job.

00:44:24.800 --> 00:44:27.119
I don't want to be you more work.

00:44:27.360 --> 00:44:30.480
Man, give me the soft life.

00:44:30.639 --> 00:44:31.440
Yes, please.

00:44:31.760 --> 00:44:33.440
Give me the soft life.

00:44:33.920 --> 00:44:38.559
And Sebastian said, and be exactly and be responsible for baby.

00:44:38.719 --> 00:44:39.679
What you said.

00:44:40.000 --> 00:44:45.840
Listen, when the clock goes out, you know, because that is a leader, we don't clock out.

00:44:46.159 --> 00:44:48.159
You are carrying that with you.

00:44:48.320 --> 00:44:52.960
Yeah, you're carrying, you're going home thinking about how can I make this better?

00:44:53.119 --> 00:44:53.760
What can I add?

00:44:53.920 --> 00:44:54.639
What can I do?

00:44:54.800 --> 00:45:00.159
You know, my friend, our friend Ashley, right now is leading, you know, a wonderful, beautiful program.

00:45:00.320 --> 00:45:05.119
And she's constantly thinking about how do I make this better, how can I add value, right?

00:45:05.280 --> 00:45:11.519
Because as leaders, you are all your mind is always thinking about the good of what you're carrying.

00:45:11.840 --> 00:45:12.639
Man, right?

00:45:12.719 --> 00:45:15.840
You don't get to just focus on you because you're carrying something.

00:45:16.000 --> 00:45:16.239
Yeah.

00:45:16.400 --> 00:45:16.559
Right.

00:45:16.719 --> 00:45:19.440
And we can get heavy laden, right?

00:45:19.599 --> 00:45:21.119
You can get heavy.

00:45:21.360 --> 00:45:25.840
Um, um, there is a I used to pray against the spirit of heaviness.

00:45:26.079 --> 00:45:28.719
Really, I was praying, you know, as I was on a weight loss journey.

00:45:28.800 --> 00:45:30.480
I prayed against the spirit of heaviness.

00:45:30.559 --> 00:45:32.320
Um, and I want to offer that to the saints.

00:45:32.400 --> 00:45:39.280
Y'all too, we all can pray against the spirit of heaviness, but in the spirit, stay with me now, friends.

00:45:39.360 --> 00:45:40.400
Stay with me, okay?

00:45:40.559 --> 00:45:52.239
In the spirit of the spirit of heaviness, where the thing that you used to count as a blessing, it's a blessing to lead these people, it's a blessing to be able to impact and influence their lives.

00:45:52.400 --> 00:45:54.800
It's a blessing to be able to pour out.

00:45:54.880 --> 00:45:56.079
Oh, I used to love that word.

00:45:56.239 --> 00:45:58.079
Oh, you know, I just like to pour out.

00:45:58.239 --> 00:46:00.719
Now I'll be like, give me my give me my stuff.

00:46:00.960 --> 00:46:02.000
Man, look, man.

00:46:03.199 --> 00:46:05.039
Give me my stuff, bruh.

00:46:06.320 --> 00:46:07.840
No, I'll pour it.

00:46:07.920 --> 00:46:08.159
Give me.

00:46:08.559 --> 00:46:09.360
Let me just, I wasn't.

00:46:10.000 --> 00:46:12.719
No, I need a bump of pour.

00:46:14.320 --> 00:46:14.639
Okay.

00:46:15.039 --> 00:46:26.480
But you know, but but when your blessing becomes a burden, when what you're carrying, right, there is a burden that is from the Lord, and then there's everything else that we added on to it.

00:46:26.719 --> 00:46:36.159
And that's the stuff that made it seem insurmountable and made you feel like you couldn't continue to persist and couldn't push past those hard times and obstacles.

00:46:36.320 --> 00:46:40.559
It's because there have been things added to what the Lord gave you.

00:46:40.800 --> 00:46:47.039
And your job as a leader is to discern what should be on your back and what needs to come off.

00:46:47.280 --> 00:46:57.679
The Bible says that we are to lay aside every weight and the sin which just so easily beset us so that we can run with patience the race that is set before us, right?

00:46:57.840 --> 00:47:02.000
You have some weights that the Lord did not add to you, right?

00:47:02.079 --> 00:47:09.519
You got the weight of shame, you got the weight of guilt, you got the weight of feeling uh insecure and the weight of a lack of confidence.

00:47:09.679 --> 00:47:11.840
You got the weight of doubt on you, right?

00:47:11.920 --> 00:47:16.400
There are weights that were not that were not part of your purpose package.

00:47:16.880 --> 00:47:21.519
You have a purpose package, and then you had everything that you picked up along the way.

00:47:21.840 --> 00:47:26.559
And we are, I think we started off by saying that we're doing a crew check.

00:47:26.719 --> 00:47:29.920
After you do a crew check, you need to do a you check, right?

00:47:30.000 --> 00:47:38.079
You need to do a crew check, then you need to do a you check, and you need to figure out what have I what have I added to my life?

00:47:38.239 --> 00:47:40.159
Yeah, what did I pick up along the way?

00:47:40.320 --> 00:47:43.679
What's something that somebody said about me that I believe?

00:47:43.840 --> 00:47:46.800
Because what you picked up is connected to what you believe.

00:47:46.880 --> 00:47:47.519
Yeah, right.

00:47:47.679 --> 00:47:49.440
What did somebody say that I believe?

00:47:49.599 --> 00:47:51.360
What did I hear that I believe?

00:47:51.440 --> 00:47:57.519
And it's altered how I'm choosing to approach God and run the race that He set me in, right?

00:47:57.760 --> 00:48:02.880
You have to be able, and then you got to discern what was a weight and what was a sin.

00:48:03.039 --> 00:48:03.199
Yeah.

00:48:03.360 --> 00:48:03.599
Right?

00:48:03.679 --> 00:48:08.559
Because a weight I need to cast off a sin, I need to repent for and change.

00:48:08.719 --> 00:48:08.960
Yeah.

00:48:09.119 --> 00:48:09.440
Right?

00:48:09.599 --> 00:48:25.199
You need to do a crew check, a you check, and you need to discern what did I pick up that I wasn't supposed to carry, and what did I pick up that I now need to repent for so that God can change my life as I pivot in this next level of my leadership.

00:48:25.920 --> 00:48:33.440
And I want to acknowledge something that um Ashley said, she said, leadership and evaluation go hand in hand.

00:48:33.679 --> 00:48:37.039
Evaluation of the situation and of yourself.

00:48:37.519 --> 00:48:52.000
You have to constantly, constantly evaluate, constantly look at and and and make changes and watch the situation, watch the circumstance, watch what's going on, watch your behavior.

00:48:52.079 --> 00:48:55.920
You have to, it is an evaluation like, okay, I did this, let's look at it and reflect.

00:48:56.079 --> 00:48:57.920
I did this, let's look at it and reflect.

00:48:58.079 --> 00:49:01.760
I did this, this happened, let's reflect, let's make something different, let's pivot.

00:49:02.159 --> 00:49:04.159
All this, it is a constant motion.

00:49:04.400 --> 00:49:21.280
Leaders are not meant to honestly, if we're honest, and I I I'm saying I'm gonna say this, but I also don't want to think like I don't want anybody to think that this is necessarily like the ideal or healthy way to do it, but it's the reality.

00:49:21.519 --> 00:49:23.599
I'm not, I'm just saying it's a reality of our.

00:49:25.840 --> 00:49:32.800
That's that that leaders mentally very seldom shut down.

00:49:33.760 --> 00:49:36.480
The mental a lot of times is going.

00:49:37.440 --> 00:49:40.639
I wish as a I wish I could shut it down.

00:49:41.360 --> 00:49:43.840
Um and it's really tough to do it.

00:49:43.920 --> 00:49:44.880
And there are moments, right?

00:49:44.960 --> 00:49:51.199
There are seasons, you know, but this coming up season, it'll be easier to do that because everybody's kind of shut down, right?

00:49:51.440 --> 00:50:01.519
Um but it's hard as a leader, as as people who have responsibilities and weights that you're carrying yours and other people's.

00:50:01.679 --> 00:50:03.760
It's hard to shut yourself down mentally.

00:50:03.920 --> 00:50:07.599
You could stop moving, but your your mind doesn't smell.

00:50:08.559 --> 00:50:08.800
Right.

00:50:08.960 --> 00:50:12.239
And so I think that that is that is a reality.

00:50:12.559 --> 00:50:16.639
And it's something that we just have to we have to learn how to endure.

00:50:16.880 --> 00:50:21.599
Um and then there is a period of acceptance.

00:50:22.960 --> 00:50:26.239
I think that as leaders, there are some things that we just have to accept.

00:50:26.719 --> 00:50:31.920
And um some of the things are are easier to accept than others, right?

00:50:32.000 --> 00:50:41.840
But it's if if one of the things that will help us mentally is if we stop uh being surprised by certain things because as leaders, this is just part of our reality.

00:50:42.400 --> 00:50:47.280
Uh and so I think one of the like we've actually come up with a little bit of a list here.

00:50:48.719 --> 00:50:52.079
I don't know how everybody's gonna feel about this list, I'm gonna be honest with you, but it's it's the truth.

00:50:52.400 --> 00:50:53.519
We we just we gonna speak.

00:50:53.599 --> 00:50:55.119
I mean, I think we've kind of been speaking truth.

00:50:55.280 --> 00:51:08.159
Oh, we just want to speak some some more kind of truth here uh as far as the realities of what leaders are actually going to experience, what you're going to get as a leader and what you're not gonna get as a leader.

00:51:08.239 --> 00:51:15.840
And that is an acceptance, that is something that we have to accept as leaders that this is our reality and this is what we've signed up.

00:51:16.079 --> 00:51:18.239
This is what you've been graced by God to be.

00:51:18.960 --> 00:51:24.960
And so I understand that this is not something that you should take that that you should look at as a burden.

00:51:25.599 --> 00:51:32.320
Look at as something that you you've been graced to be, but you also can't compare it to the experiences of other people who have a different type of grace.

00:51:33.039 --> 00:51:38.800
But this is this is your grace, and so one of the things, Aquita, we'll just kind of go back and forth.

00:51:39.119 --> 00:51:39.519
Let's do it.

00:51:39.679 --> 00:51:40.320
You know what I'm saying?

00:51:40.480 --> 00:51:46.320
Just to kind of say I I read this, we did this list the other day, y'all, and I'm telling you, it kind of made us laugh.

00:51:46.400 --> 00:51:49.679
As I'm reading it again, it's like, boy, this is just true.

00:51:49.840 --> 00:51:55.920
So one of the things that we have to accept about leadership is that leaders don't get instruction manuals.

00:51:56.880 --> 00:51:59.039
Listen, you're not you're you're not gonna get it.

00:51:59.280 --> 00:52:00.800
Nobody's coming to tell you how to do it.

00:52:00.960 --> 00:52:02.320
You're not getting a play-by-play.

00:52:02.480 --> 00:52:16.400
Now, we there are lots of books out there, there are lots of resources to help you to learn things that are important as a leader, but as far as what your responsibilities are and how you are designed to do it and what God has gifted you to do, that's just a day-by-day learning.

00:52:16.480 --> 00:52:20.239
You just gonna have to you're gonna have to walk that thing out every day.

00:52:20.480 --> 00:52:22.000
You ain't getting an instruction menu.

00:52:22.400 --> 00:52:24.239
Let me tell you what else you're not gonna get.

00:52:24.320 --> 00:52:25.119
It's affirmation.

00:52:25.280 --> 00:52:29.280
You're not always people are not always coming to tell you that you're doing the right thing.

00:52:29.440 --> 00:52:34.480
No, that they're not always coming to tell you, man, you're just really great at that, right?

00:52:34.800 --> 00:52:37.280
Sometimes you really just gotta believe in yourself.

00:52:37.360 --> 00:52:37.679
Yeah.

00:52:37.840 --> 00:52:38.000
Right?

00:52:38.079 --> 00:52:39.519
Are you are you gotta go back?

00:52:39.679 --> 00:52:42.159
This goes back to your crew.

00:52:42.320 --> 00:52:43.599
Do a crew check.

00:52:43.760 --> 00:52:56.320
There are you're not gonna get it where you're leading all the time, but you ought to have a crew that when you go back, they should be able to reflect back to you what you need to know in that moment to keep going.

00:52:56.480 --> 00:52:56.719
Right.

00:52:56.880 --> 00:53:01.679
There have been times where I've been like, man, I don't feel like I'm gonna be good enough to do this.

00:53:01.760 --> 00:53:03.599
And Ruth Abigail be like, you got it.

00:53:03.679 --> 00:53:05.440
You know, she's not a woman of many words.

00:53:05.519 --> 00:53:08.239
Um I need to hear.

00:53:08.400 --> 00:53:08.719
That's right.

00:53:08.880 --> 00:53:10.239
She gave me just enough to keep it.

00:53:10.400 --> 00:53:10.960
That's what I'm saying.

00:53:11.039 --> 00:53:11.199
Yeah.

00:53:13.039 --> 00:53:13.840
You need a crew check.

00:53:13.920 --> 00:53:21.039
Look, the other thing, as leaders, you are often not going to get a yes the first time from anybody.

00:53:21.280 --> 00:53:36.159
If you're asking for uh uh if if you're going after something, uh if you are, you know, if you're asking people for support, uh, if you are asking your team to do something, like and you want them to do a thing and you have a way you want them to do it.

00:53:36.320 --> 00:53:40.079
Oftentimes that is not gonna be done the first time the way you want it to be done.

00:53:40.400 --> 00:53:42.960
Um right, you're not gonna get a yes the first time.

00:53:43.119 --> 00:53:44.400
You have to endure.

00:53:44.639 --> 00:53:47.440
Don't think that because the yes didn't come that it won't come.

00:53:47.519 --> 00:53:52.880
And don't think that because they didn't do it this way, this time, right, the way you want it, don't think that it can't happen.

00:53:53.039 --> 00:53:54.239
You have to keep moving.

00:53:54.400 --> 00:53:58.079
Um, and so just know you probably won't get a yes the first time.

00:53:58.320 --> 00:53:59.760
Listen, this one's hard for me.

00:53:59.840 --> 00:54:01.119
You're not always gonna be understood.

00:54:01.280 --> 00:54:01.679
My goodness.

00:54:02.079 --> 00:54:05.599
In fact, rarely, rarely gonna understand you, right?

00:54:05.760 --> 00:54:06.159
That's right.

00:54:06.320 --> 00:54:10.000
Um, and you will have to make moves that other people don't agree with.

00:54:10.159 --> 00:54:10.400
Yep.

00:54:10.559 --> 00:54:13.199
You will have to make moves that other people don't understand.

00:54:13.360 --> 00:54:13.679
Yep.

00:54:13.840 --> 00:54:22.719
You because you're moving off of a vision that you're trying to relay to people and you're hoping that they catch it, but they don't always catch it the first time.

00:54:22.880 --> 00:54:23.119
No.

00:54:23.360 --> 00:54:28.559
You literally have to build the vision so that people can catch it and run with it.

00:54:29.119 --> 00:54:31.280
You gotta write it so that they'll run with it.

00:54:31.360 --> 00:54:31.519
Right.

00:54:31.760 --> 00:54:32.480
You can't just write it.

00:54:32.719 --> 00:54:42.480
You gotta say it over and over because people are not gonna understand your your ambition, your drive, your purpose, what you're seeking after.

00:54:42.559 --> 00:54:46.400
They're not gonna understand that God gave you this thing and he's trusting you with it.

00:54:46.480 --> 00:54:47.760
They ain't gonna understand none of that.

00:54:47.920 --> 00:54:48.239
No, they're not.

00:54:48.400 --> 00:54:52.800
They're gonna have to continue to reiterate it even when you feel misunderstood.

00:54:53.039 --> 00:54:56.800
And under uh, but this is something I've had to I had to learn.

00:54:56.960 --> 00:55:01.119
Um the thing that's in your head has been with you forever.

00:55:02.159 --> 00:55:05.920
When you communicate it out to other people, it just got to them.

00:55:06.400 --> 00:55:20.000
And so for you to expect for them to understand you immediately with something that's been living with you for years, uh, months, whatever, whatever the time frame is, is unfair to that person.

00:55:20.320 --> 00:55:26.960
You can't you can't take what's been living with you for years, give it to them one time and expect for them to just move.

00:55:27.679 --> 00:55:28.559
It doesn't work that way.

00:55:28.800 --> 00:55:35.360
You have you have to do what Quita was saying, you got to keep going, you have to keep reiterating it, you have to be patient with people to help them.

00:55:35.760 --> 00:55:37.760
And sometimes they'll get there, sometimes they won't.

00:55:37.920 --> 00:55:40.079
But please don't expect them to get there the first time.

00:55:40.320 --> 00:55:46.880
Um understand this as a leader, your next decision won't be easier.

00:55:47.360 --> 00:55:51.440
You likely your next decision will likely not be easier.

00:55:51.679 --> 00:55:54.000
Um we have to make decisions.

00:55:54.079 --> 00:55:56.800
We we all know what decision fatigue feels like looks like.

00:55:56.880 --> 00:55:59.519
We have to make decisions all the time.

00:56:00.000 --> 00:56:05.440
Yeah, like the art of decision making doesn't make the decisions easy.

00:56:05.679 --> 00:56:10.480
It might make your your the the the pace of making a decision a little faster.

00:56:11.360 --> 00:56:17.360
You might be a little more clear on your decision, but sometimes that decision is still gonna be hard.

00:56:17.599 --> 00:56:21.840
Um and and just understand that your next decision might not be easier.

00:56:22.159 --> 00:56:23.039
My lord.

00:56:23.280 --> 00:56:28.960
Um I I'm gonna skip to uh it is not gonna be a truth that you already know enough.

00:56:29.119 --> 00:56:29.440
My goodness.

00:56:29.679 --> 00:56:32.320
I don't care how many classes you got, I don't care how many degrees you got.

00:56:32.480 --> 00:56:34.079
Okay, I got almost all of them.

00:56:34.320 --> 00:56:35.679
Two more years in the classroom.

00:56:36.000 --> 00:56:36.480
You really do.

00:56:36.800 --> 00:56:37.199
That's crazy.

00:56:38.320 --> 00:56:40.159
I'm calling you for that's crazy.

00:56:40.880 --> 00:56:43.679
If you know prayer is your love language, I need you in there.

00:56:43.840 --> 00:56:44.079
Uh-huh.

00:56:44.320 --> 00:56:49.360
Okay, I need you, I need you in there on on behalf of God's daughter.

00:56:49.519 --> 00:56:49.840
All right.

00:56:49.920 --> 00:56:55.440
But there is always more to learn, and not just more to learn subject matter or content matter.

00:56:55.519 --> 00:56:56.639
There's more to learn about you.

00:56:56.800 --> 00:56:57.039
Absolutely.

00:56:57.280 --> 00:57:01.280
There's more to learn about the Lord, there's more to learn about the organization, right?

00:57:01.360 --> 00:57:05.360
And about the growth of the organization and what what it takes to carry vision.

00:57:05.519 --> 00:57:07.119
You don't already know enough.

00:57:07.280 --> 00:57:12.719
You are gonna have to set yourself to being in a constant state of learning and unlearning.

00:57:12.960 --> 00:57:13.599
That's right.

00:57:13.920 --> 00:57:18.639
You, as a leader, have to know that you will not arrive.

00:57:19.280 --> 00:57:22.960
Leadership is truly a journey, not a destination.

00:57:23.920 --> 00:57:26.400
When you think you've arrived, you haven't.

00:57:26.480 --> 00:57:29.119
You've hit a checkpoint, you have not finished.

00:57:29.360 --> 00:57:33.440
And if you behave like you finished, you're actually gonna start moving backwards.

00:57:33.679 --> 00:57:36.079
You can't, you cannot behave like it's done.

00:57:36.239 --> 00:57:38.320
Like, okay, I got here, great.

00:57:38.639 --> 00:57:40.239
Don't celebrate the destination.

00:57:40.400 --> 00:57:41.599
Celebrate your checkpoint.

00:57:41.679 --> 00:57:45.599
That is a celebration, but understand that you have more in your race.

00:57:45.840 --> 00:57:50.159
And as a leader, it is about the journey, it is not about the destination.

00:57:50.320 --> 00:57:52.400
You're not going to arrive anywhere.

00:57:52.559 --> 00:57:54.719
You just get to your next checkpoint.

00:57:55.039 --> 00:57:58.320
Listen, and I think this could be the last one, right?

00:57:58.639 --> 00:57:59.360
Or maybe not.

00:57:59.440 --> 00:58:00.719
I don't know how Ruth is feeling.

00:58:00.960 --> 00:58:02.800
Ruth looked like, no, it ain't, right?

00:58:02.960 --> 00:58:11.679
I mean, here's something that we really want you to have to unlearn is that you will not have to invest again into the vision that God has given you.

00:58:12.079 --> 00:58:12.480
Right?

00:58:13.119 --> 00:58:22.559
We think because we invested our time, our energy, our money, that we've done what we were supposed to do, and that now the vision will be like a well-oiled machine.

00:58:22.719 --> 00:58:26.480
There will come a season, there will come a time where you are gonna have to go.

00:58:26.559 --> 00:58:29.119
It's gonna you're gonna feel like, did I start over?

00:58:29.360 --> 00:58:29.679
Right?

00:58:29.840 --> 00:58:48.400
And when we're talking about enduring leadership, yeah, and you feel like you've been at this thing for a long time and you've been pushing and you've been going, and now you're getting to a point where you're realizing that in order for this thing to continue moving, in order for this thing to keep going and keep persisting, I'm gonna have to invest again.

00:58:48.559 --> 00:58:48.719
Yeah.

00:58:49.119 --> 00:58:55.920
I'm gonna have to find another, another source of of rejuvenation, of inspiration.

00:58:56.079 --> 00:58:59.119
I'm gonna have to go down and re-envision something again.

00:58:59.280 --> 00:59:18.719
Something that I was thinking of from when we were talking earlier is when you think about the the necessity of a pivot, if you are still doing things exactly the same way you were when you started, that is likely why you are feeling this the level of stress, anxiety, and frustration that you are in the season.

00:59:18.960 --> 00:59:26.960
Because the next season of your leadership and the next season of what you carry, what it's gonna require is for you to reinvest.

00:59:27.360 --> 00:59:27.679
Yeah.

00:59:27.840 --> 00:59:34.159
You gotta reinvest in going back to the drawing board and saying, okay, what can what else can this be?

00:59:34.320 --> 00:59:34.639
Right?

00:59:34.800 --> 00:59:41.760
I had a vision and now I've reached a point where I feel like I accomplished something and I got to where I thought I was supposed to be.

00:59:41.920 --> 00:59:44.800
But I'm still sitting here and there's still life in my body.

00:59:44.960 --> 00:59:49.119
There's still life in this organization, and we gotta get to our next place.

00:59:49.599 --> 00:59:52.320
You gotta, you have to set a moment.

00:59:52.480 --> 00:59:56.239
You have to set time to retreat and to reinvest.

00:59:57.039 --> 00:59:58.960
That's what a retreat is it's a reinvestment.

00:59:59.119 --> 00:59:59.840
Yes, that's good.

01:00:00.159 --> 01:00:02.400
And we are gonna do this last one because this is important.

01:00:02.559 --> 01:00:10.239
You gotta know that you gotta unlearn that including more people will make less work for you.

01:00:11.119 --> 01:00:18.719
You have to unlearn that including more people and whatever it is you're doing will make less work for you.

01:00:18.880 --> 01:00:26.400
Sometimes we wanna bring people on the team, we wanna hire them, we wanna, you know, we we want you to help with this, and I want I want your expertise here.

01:00:26.559 --> 01:00:33.440
And we think it's it's because I don't want to do this thing or I'm not good at it, and it's gonna make it easier for me when I have other people around me.

01:00:33.760 --> 01:00:34.159
Wrong.

01:00:34.239 --> 01:00:34.960
That's wrong.

01:00:35.039 --> 01:00:36.719
It's not, it's not gonna be easier.

01:00:37.920 --> 01:00:46.719
It will actually increase your work because people bring more than just their expertise, they bring who they are, and you have to manage people.

01:00:47.280 --> 01:00:51.360
Listen, I was under this false impression.

01:00:51.519 --> 01:00:58.480
I you your girl was was was thinking, man, we're gonna bring this do this thing, and then I can go focus on this and XYZ.

01:00:59.599 --> 01:01:19.840
It's a whole other ball game when you got people who bring their character, they bring their integrity or lack thereof, they bring their issues, they bring their personalities, they bring um their their days, they bring their current moods, they bring all of that as well as their expertise that they're contributing.

01:01:20.159 --> 01:01:23.280
Most of what they bring is outside of their expertise.

01:01:23.840 --> 01:01:29.039
Most of what they bring is themselves and everything that came with them before you knew them.

01:01:29.440 --> 01:01:31.519
Y'all, it don't make it easier.

01:01:31.920 --> 01:01:33.679
Now that's not to say you don't do it.

01:01:33.920 --> 01:01:41.280
Do it because you need help and you need to bring people in who can help you to move the move whatever forward you need to move forward.

01:01:41.519 --> 01:01:43.039
It's the same with being married.

01:01:43.679 --> 01:01:44.559
Ain't just at work.

01:01:44.960 --> 01:01:47.440
You think adding another person to your life is gonna make it easier?

01:01:47.679 --> 01:01:48.320
It isn't.

01:01:48.639 --> 01:01:53.920
You that person is coming with a whole lot of other set of things, most of which you don't know about.

01:01:54.480 --> 01:01:59.039
So just understand like adding more people doesn't mean less work for you.

01:01:59.199 --> 01:02:07.199
And it it means it's going to take more, take more effort from you than you realize, but that's also part of leadership.

01:02:07.440 --> 01:02:09.920
And it's something it's something that we have to unlearn.

01:02:10.000 --> 01:02:16.320
And that's what makes leaders so incredibly important and vital in in where you are.

01:02:16.480 --> 01:02:36.960
This is why you're so important and why you have to be there, because it takes something special to be able to manage whole people, um, and manage relationships and manage the gifts of people and manage how they how they move and help to move things forward with a group of people.

01:02:37.119 --> 01:02:38.880
That that's a skill, that's a gift.

01:02:38.960 --> 01:02:40.719
That's not something everybody can do.

01:02:40.880 --> 01:02:51.280
And so um I think it's important for you to understand again that whether it's your family, whether that's at work, whether it's a community, whether that's at church, whatever that is, that's hard.

01:02:51.440 --> 01:02:56.639
It's hard work because people are hard work and leaders lead people.

01:02:57.360 --> 01:03:00.719
Managers manage projects, leaders lead people.

01:03:00.800 --> 01:03:09.119
And if you are in a leadership position, if you're in a leadership role at any point, people are are who you are.

01:03:09.360 --> 01:03:12.159
Um people are who you're carrying.

01:03:12.800 --> 01:03:14.239
And people come with a lot.

01:03:14.800 --> 01:03:19.599
So don't don't so we have to unlearn that people, more people add people, yeah.

01:03:19.840 --> 01:03:23.519
No, more people don't make it less work, it makes it more work, right?

01:03:23.679 --> 01:03:34.800
Yeah, um, so those are just some things that we are constantly having to unlearn ourselves, and just to remember that this is the reality of a leader.

01:03:34.960 --> 01:03:38.320
This is what we must accept when we say yes to that.

01:03:38.639 --> 01:03:40.000
We have to do what we must do.

01:03:40.079 --> 01:03:41.199
This is what we gotta accept, man.

01:03:41.280 --> 01:03:42.480
I'm and I do this for me.

01:03:42.639 --> 01:03:43.760
You gotta accept it.

01:03:43.920 --> 01:03:46.639
Um and and so that's it.

01:03:46.719 --> 01:04:00.960
I if I could, just this one if I could, because I I think this is a one of those concepts that is so crucial and critical to what we're talking about in helping people to move forward.

01:04:02.000 --> 01:04:08.880
We've talked about it before, we'll probably continue to talk about this, but there is a reality to the tipping point, guys.

01:04:09.440 --> 01:04:20.079
Listen, when we're talking about enduring and we're talking about moving forward in leadership, if what the more you move forward, the closer you get to your tipping point.

01:04:20.239 --> 01:04:21.519
What is a tipping point?

01:04:21.920 --> 01:04:27.199
It is essentially the point where all right, you see my pen, if y'all watching.

01:04:27.360 --> 01:04:35.039
So if you move and you keep moving and you get to the point of the pen where there's enough leverage to make the pin fall.

01:04:35.679 --> 01:04:40.320
Yeah, it's not here, it's not here, but it's it's here.

01:04:40.400 --> 01:04:48.880
And if I tip it, my all it takes is one more step to make the tipping point.

01:04:49.039 --> 01:04:55.039
One more step for whatever it is that you're looking to actually fall into place to fall into place.

01:04:55.199 --> 01:04:59.440
Yeah, it doesn't take more energy sometimes, it doesn't take a bigger leap.

01:04:59.599 --> 01:05:01.760
It just takes keep doing what you're doing.

01:05:02.159 --> 01:05:03.199
Just keep doing it.

01:05:03.280 --> 01:05:05.599
You're gonna keep moving towards the tip.

01:05:05.760 --> 01:05:08.800
And when you get to that tip, it's gonna fall.

01:05:08.960 --> 01:05:10.559
That's when it all falls into place.

01:05:10.800 --> 01:05:11.920
It's gonna fall.

01:05:12.239 --> 01:05:18.159
Listen, friends, check your crew, check you, shorten that.

01:05:18.320 --> 01:05:19.039
What was it?

01:05:19.119 --> 01:05:19.519
Shortening.

01:05:20.800 --> 01:05:27.840
Shorten your recovery time, shorten your recovery time, rebound, and keep pushing forward.

01:05:28.000 --> 01:05:29.679
You're almost at your tipping point.

01:05:29.840 --> 01:05:30.559
You're almost there.

01:05:30.719 --> 01:05:32.320
That's enduring leadership right there.

01:05:35.599 --> 01:05:35.920
Yay.

01:05:36.719 --> 01:05:41.599
If you guys rocked with us to the end, thank you so much for coming to meeting, guys.

01:05:42.079 --> 01:05:44.000
Absolutely fantastic time.

01:05:44.079 --> 01:05:46.639
I think every time we go live, we're like, nobody's gonna come.

01:05:46.880 --> 01:05:47.440
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:05:47.519 --> 01:05:48.320
We don't know.

01:05:48.400 --> 01:05:52.480
Me and Ruth Abigail were fully prepared to see this and talk like there was a lot of people.

01:05:54.559 --> 01:05:58.159
Listen, I was like, I'll let the rocks cry out, okay?

01:05:58.320 --> 01:05:59.840
We will preach to these rocks.

01:06:00.400 --> 01:06:02.000
I will preach to this blank screen.

01:06:02.079 --> 01:06:02.719
Yes, I will.

01:06:03.119 --> 01:06:05.199
So thank you all so much for rocking with us.

01:06:05.360 --> 01:06:08.400
Thank you all so much for continuing to rock with the podcast.

01:06:08.480 --> 01:06:12.000
If this is the first time you've seen us, we do have a podcast.

01:06:12.239 --> 01:06:13.760
We call the Unlearned Podcast.

01:06:14.079 --> 01:06:21.599
You can like, share, and follow us on all streaming platforms, okay, including the one you're watching us on today, right?

01:06:21.760 --> 01:06:26.639
And we are two middle adults that talk about leadership and the things, okay?

01:06:26.880 --> 01:06:27.199
Yes.

01:06:27.840 --> 01:06:28.880
We do this, guys.

01:06:29.039 --> 01:06:29.519
We do this.

01:06:29.679 --> 01:06:34.239
Um, all right, so we're going to share something fun that is coming up.

01:06:34.400 --> 01:06:40.079
You guys, Jaquita Ross is getting ready to drop her own segment.

01:06:40.320 --> 01:06:42.719
It's called The Second Act.

01:06:42.880 --> 01:06:45.599
Quita, why don't you tell just a little bit about what your segments are about?

01:06:46.800 --> 01:06:53.599
Listen, you know, I was I was praying about the second act, the new, the new segment I'm starting and what it really means.

01:06:53.760 --> 01:07:08.239
And God has given me a platform where He has allowed me to really help to navigate the stories of people's lives and how they have moved through their lives to learn and unlearn some things.

01:07:08.400 --> 01:07:08.639
Right.

01:07:08.719 --> 01:07:16.320
So the second act is when you go to a play and you're in there watching a play, you go in when you first sit down, you're watching the first act.

01:07:16.480 --> 01:07:18.079
That's the setup of the characters.

01:07:18.159 --> 01:07:19.599
That's where we're learning who they are.

01:07:19.760 --> 01:07:25.039
We're learning what their challenges are, um, things that they are they're going to have to overcome, right?

01:07:25.119 --> 01:07:30.480
You get to the uh the first act, and then there's an intermission where they go backstage, right?

01:07:30.559 --> 01:07:33.840
And they get equipped for what's coming in the second act.

01:07:33.920 --> 01:07:39.119
Because in the second act, there's resolutions, there's answers, there's triumph, there's victory.

01:07:39.280 --> 01:07:58.159
And so what we're doing in our segment, the second act, is we are bringing guests onto the podcast who are talking about how they moved through their first act, what they learned in their intermission, and how they are redefining and rewriting their story so that they can show us how they're winning in their second act.

01:07:58.320 --> 01:08:02.960
So, friends, please, please, please come join me on the new segment.

01:08:03.119 --> 01:08:06.639
First episode will be out first Tuesday in December.

01:08:06.800 --> 01:08:09.760
We really cannot wait to rock with you all.

01:08:09.840 --> 01:08:12.639
I've been recording these and they're gonna be absolutely amazing.

01:08:12.880 --> 01:08:17.920
Y'all, I just need y'all to give a shout out to Jaquita because it took me about a year to convince her to do her own thing.

01:08:18.079 --> 01:08:22.960
And um, and we are here and we are so excited, and I cannot wait for this.

01:08:23.039 --> 01:08:24.960
It is going to be a great segment.

01:08:25.039 --> 01:08:28.720
Uh, y'all make sure to tune in to the second act.

01:08:28.880 --> 01:08:35.760
Um, but y'all listen, uh, if you thought this live was worth anything, share it with somebody else.

01:08:35.920 --> 01:08:41.760
Uh and and like, share, subscribe to the podcast, join the community.

01:08:42.000 --> 01:08:44.880
We're um always wanting to include more people.

01:08:45.199 --> 01:08:47.439
And we will see y'all.

01:08:47.600 --> 01:08:51.920
Uh the two of us, you'll see the two of us again in 2026.

01:08:52.159 --> 01:08:54.399
Um, yeah.

01:08:54.560 --> 01:08:55.119
We'll be back.

01:08:55.439 --> 01:08:56.000
We'll be back.

01:08:56.159 --> 01:08:56.640
We'll be back.

01:08:57.760 --> 01:08:58.319
We'll take a little break.

01:08:59.359 --> 01:09:01.199
But middle adults, we always around.

01:09:01.359 --> 01:09:02.000
We're gonna be back.

01:09:02.079 --> 01:09:03.439
And look, we always around.

01:09:03.600 --> 01:09:05.359
But you can always go back to the archives.

01:09:05.520 --> 01:09:06.560
We got plenty of stuff.

01:09:06.720 --> 01:09:11.439
Uh, check it out on YouTube, check it out on Spotify, Apple Music, all of that.

01:09:11.520 --> 01:09:21.520
Uh, but y'all, until let's until then, let's keep unlearning together so that we can experience more freedom.

01:09:22.479 --> 01:09:23.199
Peace.

01:09:28.479 --> 01:09:31.520
Thank you once again for listening to the Unlearned Podcast.

01:09:31.600 --> 01:09:35.840
We would love to hear your comments and your feedback about the episode.

01:09:36.079 --> 01:09:42.479
Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think.

01:09:42.640 --> 01:09:48.960
We're looking forward to the next time when we are able to unlearn together to move forward towards freedom.

01:09:49.119 --> 01:09:50.079
See you then.