Oct. 27, 2025

What's Your Leadership Style: Unlearning Situational Leadership

What's Your Leadership Style: Unlearning Situational Leadership

Send us a text We explore situational leadership with clear lines between crisis control and season-long guidance, naming the hero trap, burnout, and how to build trust, culture, and vision by developing people. Practical tools include better questions, motivation cues, and when to let safe balls drop. • definition of situational leadership and core traits • when authoritarian direction fits emergencies • risks to trust, culture and long-term vision • burnout and the hero trap of constant re...

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Send us a text

We explore situational leadership with clear lines between crisis control and season-long guidance, naming the hero trap, burnout, and how to build trust, culture, and vision by developing people. Practical tools include better questions, motivation cues, and when to let safe balls drop.

• definition of situational leadership and core traits
• when authoritarian direction fits emergencies
• risks to trust, culture and long-term vision
• burnout and the hero trap of constant rescuing
• delegating authority vs over-supporting tasks
• reading individual motivation and wiring
• ask what and how instead of do and have
• judging character fairly vs mirroring yourself
• safe arenas for failure, feedback and growth
• achievers stepping back, mission-minded stepping forward

Listen, friends, you're gonna come in and you're gonna join the community, okay? Hit the heart. Please like, share, and for sure subscribe. If you share, tag us in it.


00:00 - Welcome And City Banter

02:30 - Framing Situational Leadership

05:20 - Growing Into Flexibility

09:30 - Crisis Vs Season Leadership

12:20 - Trust, Culture, And Vision Risks

16:20 - The Burnout And Hero Trap

21:00 - Delegate For Development

25:20 - Individual Motivation Differences

30:40 - Respond To People, Not Problems

35:20 - Asking Better Questions

40:00 - Motive Check And Center Stage

44:40 - Character Over Skill Decisions

48:40 - Achievers: Step Back To Lead

53:30 - Process People And Impact

58:00 - Finding Your Superpower

01:02:20 - Series Close And Community CTA

WEBVTT

00:00:03.200 --> 00:00:04.719
Yo, what's up, everybody?

00:00:04.799 --> 00:00:07.599
And welcome once again to the Unlearned Podcast.

00:00:07.679 --> 00:00:10.480
I'm your host, Ruth Abigail, aka R A.

00:00:11.119 --> 00:00:11.839
What's up, friends?

00:00:11.919 --> 00:00:13.039
It's your girl, Jaquita.

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And this is the podcast that is helping you gain the courage to change your mind so that you can experience more freedom.

00:00:21.039 --> 00:00:22.079
Freedom.

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Freedom.

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Listen, um, Ruth Abigail, how's it going out there in those Memphis streets?

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Memphis is great.

00:00:32.640 --> 00:00:33.520
Memphis is good.

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Memphis is great.

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You know what I'm saying?

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What we do is what we do out here, you know what I'm saying?

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Um, I know.

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Y'all do a lot.

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I know.

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But you know, I I just recently talked to a friend who is, I think, moving to Memphis.

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Really?

00:00:49.039 --> 00:00:52.479
Actually, and Memphis is the city that I think I brag on the most.

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And Chicago.

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I love Chicago.

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But whenever somebody's like, yeah, I think I'm gonna go visit Memphis, I'm like, you're gonna have a great time.

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And you're gonna eat so well.

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Very good.

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But stay safe.

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Okay, but don't do that.

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Don't do that.

00:01:06.560 --> 00:01:07.359
See, don't do that.

00:01:07.680 --> 00:01:10.879
So don't do that because you ain't no need to add that last part.

00:01:10.959 --> 00:01:11.280
Okay.

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It ain't, it ain't, it's fine.

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You be all right.

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You just as safe in other places as you is here, okay?

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Just be smart.

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You need that's what you need to tell people.

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Be smart.

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You know what you know.

00:01:21.840 --> 00:01:24.799
You know what we don't tell people to do when they come to South Carolina?

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Like, hey, all right, you need to be wise in the streets.

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You do though, right?

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You need to make smart, you need to make smart decisions.

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Nobody gives that disclaimer.

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No.

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You should.

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You got crazy people everywhere.

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You should.

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You got crazy people everywhere.

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You tripping.

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No.

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Nevertheless.

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Uh, you know, I think it's funny before we uh before we press play on the podcast today, we were talking about how these middle adult bodies don't do what they used to do.

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They don't.

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Um but you know, one thing I am grateful, the body does not do what it used to do, but I do feel like the mind and the heart are getting sharper.

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Absolutely.

00:02:03.359 --> 00:02:15.520
You know, um and I think that it's a great segue in thinking about how we kind of age through like how our body works and what what works for us.

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Even in our leadership style, I think this leadership style today, I'm good at what I do, baby.

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I'm good at what I'm doing.

00:02:22.240 --> 00:02:30.879
Okay, but I think that this leadership style is definitely one that comes with that level of maturity and that level of understanding.

00:02:31.039 --> 00:02:36.000
Um, so as you guys know, we've been talking about all of the different leadership styles.

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We are actually on the last one two.

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Last one, guys.

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Last one.

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Um, and it's one that I think, you know, I'm glad we saved it for last because it's the one that can kind of pick and choose from all of them and kind of make informed decisions in the moment.

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But we're gonna talk about some of the strengths and weaknesses of that today, guys.

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We're talking about situational leadership.

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Situational leadership.

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Situation a leadership for every a leader for every situation.

00:03:06.400 --> 00:03:07.919
You don't even know the song, do you?

00:03:08.080 --> 00:03:08.639
I do not.

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I wasn't paying attention.

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Never mind.

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Anyways, we're talking about situational leadership.

00:03:13.520 --> 00:03:32.560
Yeah, we're talking about situational leadership, and so uh to get us started, um this is the definition for those of you, it's actually it's pretty like self-explanatory, um, but it's good to kind of just read it and get a get a baseline uh of really what it is.

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So it's a leadership style where they're where the leader adapts their approach based on the current work environment and needs of their team.

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All right.

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It's characterized by flexibility and the ability to uh the ability to be directive and supportive, depending on the followers' individual needs and developmental levels.

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All right.

00:03:54.400 --> 00:03:58.800
Um, so it's a situational leader is very aware of their team.

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They're they're very keen to who they are and what they need um and to whatever situation is at hand.

00:04:04.800 --> 00:04:08.159
You have to be a pretty um observant uh person.

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You have to be a discerning person to do this well, um, and you have to be, like it said, flexible to do this well.

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And so um that is uh that is what situational leadership is.

00:04:20.319 --> 00:04:29.920
Is this uh a style that you uh have experienced either as a leader or on the other side of it, having a leader who did this?

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I definitely think, and this is why I was talking about like it's something that I feel like most people grow into.

00:04:37.680 --> 00:04:48.879
Um, because it's it you will get to a point in your leadership where you think you're killing it, and then that one person that you're leading is like, this doesn't work.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:04:50.560 --> 00:04:52.399
And you're like, what you mean?

00:04:52.560 --> 00:04:53.279
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

00:04:53.519 --> 00:05:08.000
Okay, I have been working on being this type of leader, you know, and then you get to a point where it's okay, you have to expand how you're offering leadership to the people that you lead.

00:05:08.079 --> 00:05:28.160
And so um I definitely think that that has happened to me where I realized that I needed to adapt my leadership style, um, not just for the situations that were coming up, because I do think that like in the work that I used to do, especially in the involvement world, stuff is always coming up.

00:05:28.480 --> 00:05:36.399
You know, and I work at a pretty high profile school, and I was like, Lord, if something happens, we might end up in the news or something, you know.

00:05:36.560 --> 00:05:36.720
Yeah.

00:05:36.879 --> 00:05:43.439
When I worked at, when I worked at, you know, technical colleges and stuff, I never worried that somebody was gonna come with a news camp.

00:05:43.600 --> 00:05:44.240
That's a fair point.

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I was never concerned about that, but you know, I I had to be on my toes.

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And so I had to be ready to respond for any different type of situation that came up.

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And I think that that uh I think that situational leadership, much like um, what was the one that we said was good with authoritative?

00:06:07.439 --> 00:06:14.079
Okay um, like I think that these can be really good at helping people to navigate difficult times.

00:06:14.319 --> 00:06:14.639
Yeah.

00:06:14.800 --> 00:06:19.279
Because you're able to kind of tailor make not emergent times though.

00:06:19.360 --> 00:06:19.920
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:20.480
No, that's right.

00:06:20.560 --> 00:06:25.040
Yeah, emergency, you need that authoritarian person who's gonna be like, hey, everybody hush.

00:06:25.120 --> 00:06:26.160
Yeah, listen to my voice.

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I'm gonna get us where we need to go.

00:06:27.759 --> 00:06:28.000
Yeah.

00:06:28.160 --> 00:06:28.399
Right.

00:06:28.480 --> 00:06:32.399
But I think situational leadership can lead you through a season.

00:06:32.560 --> 00:06:33.120
Yeah.

00:06:33.360 --> 00:06:45.120
And and lead you and lead an organization through a tough time where we have to pivot and make changes and are where somebody on the team needs something that's different from everyone else.

00:06:45.279 --> 00:06:48.480
Like I think situational leadership was built for those times.

00:06:48.560 --> 00:06:52.879
And so, yes, I have both employed and experienced it.

00:06:53.360 --> 00:06:53.839
Mm-hmm.

00:06:55.439 --> 00:07:05.439
Um, yeah, I have uh I in my tenure where I am now, I've had two in the last five or six years.

00:07:05.759 --> 00:07:06.399
Almost tenure.

00:07:06.639 --> 00:07:07.920
Gosh, is that six years?

00:07:08.720 --> 00:07:09.600
Almost six years.

00:07:10.000 --> 00:07:15.519
Um I uh I've had two very, very different types of teams.

00:07:16.480 --> 00:07:24.000
Um and so that has required some pretty intense situational leadership.

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And that the the pivot of um of of leading one way based on this team, and then pretty, you know, abrupt in some ways fairly abruptly shifting, right?

00:07:36.639 --> 00:07:40.319
And having to really lead a very different way because I have a very different team.

00:07:40.560 --> 00:07:57.199
Um and I think that as a leader, to be honest with you, there's a part of me, and I'm just now kind of coming to this it like in this moment, there's a part of me that feels like I'm still learning who I am as a leader because of that.

00:07:57.600 --> 00:07:59.040
Yes, you know what I mean?

00:07:59.279 --> 00:08:00.399
No, no, I get that.

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I do get that.

00:08:01.839 --> 00:08:02.800
Yeah, yeah.

00:08:03.120 --> 00:08:06.639
I think and here and I think here's the challenge for everyone.

00:08:06.959 --> 00:08:16.079
And you know, we're gonna have a special segment soon where I think we'll be able to dig a little bit deeper into this, is that the leadership style is the beginning.

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It is the beginning of understanding who you are as a leader.

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For sure, you know, like knowing where you primarily sit, um, and and knowing your approach to things, I think is the beginning of understanding who you are, but you have to link that.

00:08:33.120 --> 00:08:36.960
You have to link style to purpose, right?

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And purpose, purpose is not um, purpose is not I have a purpose in a thing, right?

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Purpose is something that I carry with me everywhere that I go.

00:08:47.360 --> 00:08:47.679
That's right.

00:08:47.840 --> 00:08:55.279
And so you have to be able to link style with purpose, with values, like there's there's more to discover.

00:08:55.519 --> 00:08:57.200
Um, yeah, there's yeah, yeah.

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And it all works together.

00:08:59.120 --> 00:09:00.000
Yeah, it does.

00:09:00.159 --> 00:09:04.159
And I think um to that to that point, I'm glad you said that.

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Because uh especially like, you know, um with this, with this particular leadership style, if if you're not careful, and this is one of the downfalls to it, it can as as confusing as it might be to you, it's gonna also be confusing to your team.

00:09:20.159 --> 00:09:30.480
And so, because you if you're on if you're always only responsive, which is what this style really is, you're responding to what you see and what you need to do a lot of times, right?

00:09:30.639 --> 00:09:42.480
But if that's kind of your your um, if that's your MO, I'm gonna, I'm gonna respond to what I see, and that's what I'm gonna do how I'm gonna operate, then it's gonna be really hard to do two things.

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It's gonna be hard to establish trust and it's gonna be hard to establish culture.

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Okay.

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Yes.

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Um I'd also like to say it it may be difficult to establish long-term vision.

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For sure.

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Because you're always in the moment.

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Because you're always in the moment.

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And and so I think that so you're it's gonna be hard to establish trust, culture, and long-term vision, and if if you cut if you stay in this style.

00:10:09.120 --> 00:10:28.559
What one thing is I will say having lived in this style um for for for a while, um it it becomes it can be it can become comfortable because it really re it doesn't require as much preparation, right?

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And doesn't it doesn't require as much um you can improv.

00:10:33.919 --> 00:10:37.120
Yeah, I mean, you kind of just you know, you just okay, what's going on?

00:10:37.279 --> 00:10:47.679
Okay, you just you're just responding, you're putting out fires or you are, you know, um, you're just you're living for the next thing, you're living for the next moment.

00:10:48.000 --> 00:10:50.799
And I also think it be it becomes performative.

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Um, and so you also for me now I'm a in an Enneagram, I'm a three.

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Uh so that is my I'm a that I'm a performer, I'm a worker, I'm a performer.

00:11:01.759 --> 00:11:02.559
That's what I do.

00:11:02.799 --> 00:11:15.759
So I'll be honest, this style can also kind of um if if I'm not careful, can uh I can easily become the star of the show, right?

00:11:16.159 --> 00:11:17.519
Um as a leader.

00:11:17.679 --> 00:11:21.360
And as a leader, if you're a healthy leader, you don't need to be the star of the show.

00:11:21.600 --> 00:11:25.519
You aren't the star, you're you have a team and you all work together.

00:11:25.679 --> 00:11:27.919
Like we said, leadership is not a ladder, it's a circle.

00:11:28.000 --> 00:11:29.600
So everybody's got their turn.

00:11:29.840 --> 00:12:00.240
And if you if you are if you do not, if you're not careful about being a a situation, if you if you're not careful about being um discerning as to when to use this particular style, then you can kind of be the one to save the day, or you could be the one that is like, oh, you know, he or she really knows me, she gets me, you become the star, you become the the leader that every individual really appreciates.

00:12:00.639 --> 00:12:02.080
But this is so good.

00:12:02.399 --> 00:12:09.679
You don't necessarily bring together and build, you're not building something that's cohesive.

00:12:09.840 --> 00:12:25.039
And you don't, okay, a couple of things, because I think that that this leadership style has kind of like a superhero kind of cast on it, you know, like Superman, you know, it's like Spider-Man chilling in his house and he's like, oh Lord, something happening.

00:12:25.200 --> 00:12:25.360
Right.

00:12:25.519 --> 00:12:27.279
You know, let me get let me get the soup, right?

00:12:27.440 --> 00:12:33.200
Let me come out, you know, let me do the things, you know, so I can save the day again, you know.

00:12:33.440 --> 00:12:42.159
And I think that we have to, we have to make sure our job as leaders, well, it can vary.

00:12:42.240 --> 00:12:48.720
But I'm gonna say from my perspective, your job as leader, as a leader is to build the next set of leaders.

00:12:48.879 --> 00:12:49.759
Yeah, I agree.

00:12:50.080 --> 00:12:50.480
I agree.

00:12:50.720 --> 00:13:04.000
You are, you are, and and uh sometimes, a lot of times, that means not saving the day, but allowing the team to develop into the people that can do the thing.

00:13:04.240 --> 00:13:07.039
Which sometimes not just you, you know what I'm saying?

00:13:07.360 --> 00:13:08.879
You're gonna have to let stuff fall.

00:13:09.120 --> 00:13:18.080
You're gonna have boy, and that situational leadership style, I think is I think it's probably hardest for them to do that.

00:13:18.240 --> 00:13:18.879
For sure.

00:13:18.960 --> 00:13:19.120
Yeah.

00:13:19.360 --> 00:13:49.360
I think because they are you you make it seem like you have delegated authority, yeah, but you're watching it so closely that you're always on top of, you know, you're hyper-aware of what people are doing, if they're doing it well, if your team is performing, if you're meeting metrics and goals, if you're following the rules, you know, that you're so on top of it that nobody can get from up under you.

00:13:49.519 --> 00:13:49.840
Yeah.

00:13:51.200 --> 00:13:51.840
That's good.

00:13:52.879 --> 00:13:54.240
I'm sorry, because I've been there.

00:13:54.399 --> 00:13:54.960
Uh yeah.

00:13:55.600 --> 00:14:12.159
And you think because the team is has met a goal, or that we avoided um, you know, catastrophe, or that something went really well and that something didn't go really wrong, that you have done a great job as a leader.

00:14:12.399 --> 00:14:12.960
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:14:13.200 --> 00:14:17.919
And you get to make a report that says, hey, my team has done well.

00:14:18.159 --> 00:14:21.120
We we we had a situation, but it got handled.

00:14:21.440 --> 00:14:24.399
But people under you are not developed.

00:14:24.559 --> 00:14:25.120
Yes.

00:14:25.440 --> 00:14:39.200
They they leave with no knowledge, no experience, no, uh, they've built no muscle because every time there was a weight in their hand, you either walk them through it, right?

00:14:39.279 --> 00:14:41.440
It says you can be directive or supportive.

00:14:41.759 --> 00:14:50.240
You either directed them through it and didn't let them figure it out themselves, or you over-supported to the point where you were doing the work.

00:14:50.480 --> 00:14:50.960
Yeah.

00:14:51.200 --> 00:15:03.600
Um and then, sorry, because I think that the other thing that happens is that you're so busy running to all of the fires, and now you're burnt out.

00:15:03.919 --> 00:15:04.720
Man, come on.

00:15:04.799 --> 00:15:05.440
That's real.

00:15:05.600 --> 00:15:10.960
That's that's but you burnt out because you took the responsibility, you became a firefighter.

00:15:11.120 --> 00:15:12.000
That's right.

00:15:12.320 --> 00:15:14.399
And that's that that wasn't your job.

00:15:14.559 --> 00:15:15.120
That's right.

00:15:15.279 --> 00:15:15.759
That's right.

00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:20.320
There is there is order and protocol for a reason.

00:15:20.559 --> 00:15:24.559
And I'm sorry, it's all coming to me right now.

00:15:25.120 --> 00:15:27.519
One, let me stay on the burnout part.

00:15:27.759 --> 00:15:31.039
You run in the fires that aren't yours to fix.

00:15:31.519 --> 00:15:35.360
Everything that you see is not your thing to fix.

00:15:35.519 --> 00:15:35.840
Yeah.

00:15:36.000 --> 00:15:42.960
It's not your fire to put out, and every fire that you see is not gonna burn down the whole building.

00:15:43.200 --> 00:15:50.080
You know, you take a situation and now it's blown up because you're you are very situation focused.

00:15:50.240 --> 00:15:50.720
That's right.

00:15:50.879 --> 00:15:59.039
And you think because you can see the situation, situation so clearly, you you think you see the whole picture.

00:15:59.519 --> 00:16:04.399
But you're looking at the you're looking at the situation and you're not looking at the people.

00:16:04.879 --> 00:16:09.519
You have firefighters on your team, but you keep taking the holes out of their hands.

00:16:09.679 --> 00:16:10.240
That's right.

00:16:10.399 --> 00:16:11.039
Yeah.

00:16:11.600 --> 00:16:15.519
You have you have people who can do it honestly better than you.

00:16:15.679 --> 00:16:16.159
Mm-hmm.

00:16:16.559 --> 00:16:20.480
Who can, and I'm not talking about doing the work, right?

00:16:20.639 --> 00:16:22.720
Because any, let's let's just be honest.

00:16:22.960 --> 00:16:24.240
Anybody can do the work.

00:16:24.480 --> 00:16:24.720
Yeah.

00:16:24.960 --> 00:16:29.519
Usually when it comes to, I mean, they may not be able to do it as well as some other people.

00:16:30.320 --> 00:16:34.720
But you can put somebody there and say, hey, do A, B, and C, right?

00:16:35.039 --> 00:16:36.320
And they can get it done.

00:16:36.559 --> 00:16:43.440
But the reason why we have specific jobs for specific people is because people are anointed and gifted to do certain things.

00:16:43.600 --> 00:16:44.240
Yeah.

00:16:44.480 --> 00:16:48.399
And you have, and they can take something to the next level that you can't.

00:16:48.559 --> 00:16:49.039
That's right.

00:16:49.200 --> 00:16:53.600
But every time you step in and you say, Okay, I know what I know what we need to do.

00:16:53.679 --> 00:16:56.480
Everybody follow, you know, here's the solution.

00:16:56.639 --> 00:17:05.359
You're always giving solutions, you're always giving answers, but you you're not empowering and strengthening your people to grow.

00:17:05.680 --> 00:17:15.920
One of my um, one of my team members challenges me on that, and I and I appreciate that, because I I I definitely lean in that direction.

00:17:16.079 --> 00:17:19.680
Like I I I um I lean in that direction.

00:17:19.839 --> 00:17:26.000
You know, you you partly because you just want it to be, you want the whatever it is you're doing to be right.

00:17:26.400 --> 00:17:31.680
Um sometimes sometimes, and and this is a tough, this is a tough tension I deal with.

00:17:32.000 --> 00:17:37.680
Um sometimes there is a lack of trust because there are, you know, there there are moments.

00:17:38.160 --> 00:17:39.599
Like, actually, I don't trust you.

00:17:39.759 --> 00:17:41.759
I mean, sometimes I don't, if I'm just being honest.

00:17:41.920 --> 00:17:57.359
Like, sometimes, and and I it's you know it's not it sometimes it's just a matter of like believing that people the growth is real and that what they did before they won't do again.

00:17:58.079 --> 00:18:00.799
Now you have to you have to believe that, right?

00:18:01.039 --> 00:18:08.559
Uh because I've been in situations where you know you have team members who drop the ball, right?

00:18:08.880 --> 00:18:10.400
And it's it comes back around.

00:18:10.480 --> 00:18:16.640
And the question is, are you going to take the risk of them dropping the ball again?

00:18:16.720 --> 00:18:20.000
Or are you gonna trust that they they are gonna handle it?

00:18:20.160 --> 00:18:23.599
And sometimes, sometimes they've handled it, sometimes they haven't, right?

00:18:23.839 --> 00:18:38.720
And so, but as a situational leader, um, as somebody who if is is bent towards that or has felt like they have to be in that space, um, it's hard to do that.

00:18:38.880 --> 00:18:42.079
Let me and let just let me just I'm just gonna have a transparent moment.

00:18:42.480 --> 00:18:43.200
Real talk.

00:18:43.519 --> 00:18:47.599
I really have I have had to manage a lot of transition.

00:18:47.680 --> 00:18:50.000
I've said this before a lot of times on the show.

00:18:50.880 --> 00:18:56.640
I've managed a ton of transition in my in in this current role I'm in um as an organizational leader.

00:18:57.279 --> 00:19:13.759
And I don't know that I have there's there's maybe two people, if I'm just being totally honest, that I have worked with long enough to fully trust, to know that if even if they drop it, it's okay, then I can drop it again.

00:19:14.319 --> 00:19:43.440
And sometimes it takes time, and I've been so wired um to I'm I've been so wired to like with this with the sit in the situational leadership role because to respond because of either just uh the people that are new, and sometimes, you know, this is a it actually is a great leadership style for a novice team because you just they just need time, they gotta learn, right?

00:19:43.680 --> 00:19:47.200
And so you have to kind of direction they need the direction, right?

00:19:47.519 --> 00:19:48.799
And and support, yeah.

00:19:48.960 --> 00:19:52.960
And so I feel like I've been in that space for a while.

00:19:53.119 --> 00:20:01.200
And and when you get to the edge of people when it's ready to to to kind of turn it over, then there's a transition.

00:20:01.279 --> 00:20:02.559
And so you gotta do it again.

00:20:02.720 --> 00:20:06.319
So you get used to that cycle and you get used to that response time.

00:20:06.559 --> 00:20:31.839
And so for those of you like me who have been in the midst of a lot of transition over the last few years, this can be you might want to look at this and if this is sounding familiar, then what what I would encourage you to do is to uh take a step back and take a step back and and just take a step back.

00:20:35.200 --> 00:20:43.759
Because you you you don't realize that um you don't realize that you are uh stunting the development, and I've been guilty of that.

00:20:44.160 --> 00:20:48.960
And so even if it's okay, it's okay, it's okay it's necessary that the ball drops.

00:20:49.119 --> 00:20:51.359
And I I have I've done that plenty of times.

00:20:54.400 --> 00:20:56.480
And and let them pick it up, right?

00:20:56.640 --> 00:21:12.000
I think there's this is also a reason, and I've seen this too, and I and I the that people people actually want to develop, and and I think sometimes leaders don't take that into consideration.

00:21:12.160 --> 00:21:18.799
I think we don't always think the best in people sometimes, and it's like people want to develop.

00:21:18.960 --> 00:21:20.799
I know, I know, I know, I know, I know.

00:21:20.960 --> 00:21:21.599
Hold on, hold on.

00:21:23.039 --> 00:21:30.079
People want to develop, and so you gotta let them, and if you let them, they'll probably stay longer.

00:21:30.400 --> 00:21:47.200
The you know their length of time, so then when you lengthen the time, you build up the trust, you build up the culture, and you're not as required to be as responsive, and you can start to delve into other other um leadership styles other than this situation.

00:21:48.079 --> 00:21:49.920
Excellent point, Sue Abigail.

00:21:50.079 --> 00:22:35.359
I think something that is gonna be critical for a situational leader to realize is that one, everyone is not you, and I think a lot of times what happens is is that we get stuck in believing that we know and understand how people will respond and how they will navigate different situations and circumstances, and you come up with cookie-cutter uh solutions that came out of your brain, and then you impose those solutions onto people who don't think or process or understand things in the way that you do, not because they're less mature, but because they're wired differently.

00:22:35.519 --> 00:22:40.640
Yeah, and so you keep forcing yourself as the solution.

00:22:40.720 --> 00:22:47.440
You keep saying the way I think, the way I understand, the way I perceive things is the answer.

00:22:48.000 --> 00:23:15.839
And that person begins an internal battle of feeling unheard, misunderstood, constantly feeling like they have to prove themselves because they're like, okay, I gotta live up to whatever way it is that my leader thinks or acts are, you know, I gotta do things the way that they do it, instead of you allowing them an opportunity to explore, okay, wait, whoa, whoa, whoa.

00:23:16.160 --> 00:23:29.039
My brain and my experiences and my skill sets are going to lead me to do something different in the situation that may produce a different result that's actually better.

00:23:29.359 --> 00:23:30.000
Yeah.

00:23:30.480 --> 00:23:36.559
Because again, you have to know when we look at who is hired for the job.

00:23:36.799 --> 00:23:48.240
I, you know, I like to think that hopefully the people who have been put in positions, whether they are the positions at the bottom of the organization or the positions at the top.

00:23:48.480 --> 00:24:01.680
If someone that is anointed and gifted and has has what's in them, they have what's necessary to fulfill the position in a way that's gonna launch us forward.

00:24:01.839 --> 00:24:02.160
Yeah.

00:24:02.319 --> 00:24:02.640
Right?

00:24:02.799 --> 00:24:04.480
You have to believe that.

00:24:04.799 --> 00:24:11.920
But sometimes in in the ways that we lead people, we say, I gotta show them how to do this.

00:24:12.160 --> 00:24:13.279
They don't know what they're doing.

00:24:13.359 --> 00:24:28.960
I don't know why they are if they don't move at the pace that you move at, or they don't move in the way that you move, or they don't think about things the way that you think about your mind is always, I gotta train them, I gotta, I gotta mold them, I gotta get them.

00:24:29.119 --> 00:24:33.920
I want things done the way there is a right way to do things.

00:24:34.160 --> 00:24:36.880
Um, and you get stuck, you know.

00:24:37.119 --> 00:24:42.720
Uh pre-uh recording today, we were talking about just ways that were motivated.

00:24:42.960 --> 00:24:43.279
Yeah.

00:24:43.440 --> 00:24:51.359
Um and uh, you know, I was telling them, you know, Ruth and Joy are both like, you know, prove them people.

00:24:51.519 --> 00:24:56.400
Like, you know, you tell me I can't do something, I'm going to prove you wrong.

00:24:56.559 --> 00:24:56.799
Absolutely.

00:25:00.880 --> 00:25:02.559
My time, and my effort.

00:25:02.640 --> 00:25:06.640
And I'm going, and and I'm not gonna try, I'm going to achieve.

00:25:06.799 --> 00:25:06.880
Right.

00:25:07.279 --> 00:25:07.519
100%.

00:25:08.000 --> 00:25:09.759
I'm gonna make sure that I do it.

00:25:10.079 --> 00:25:15.200
It's gonna be friend Jaquita is not that way, right?

00:25:15.359 --> 00:25:16.720
I've tried being that way.

00:25:16.880 --> 00:25:17.759
It does not work for me.

00:25:17.920 --> 00:25:18.480
It's not true.

00:25:18.559 --> 00:25:24.319
When people, when people come at me with the, you know what, you probably, you know, you really can't do that.

00:25:24.400 --> 00:25:26.240
You know, you're not good at that thing.

00:25:26.480 --> 00:25:29.599
I'm like, a part of me is like, you know what?

00:25:30.000 --> 00:25:31.440
You might be right.

00:25:32.400 --> 00:25:40.319
And I'm not finna sit here and allow myself to be made a mockery of I'm walking away.

00:25:41.359 --> 00:25:43.359
Okay, I'm out of here.

00:25:43.519 --> 00:25:43.839
Right?

00:25:44.079 --> 00:25:56.000
When you tell me I'm not something, and if I really don't believe I am, now if I deep down in my heart, like if somebody were to tell me I'm not funny, okay, I'd be like, all right.

00:25:56.559 --> 00:25:57.839
No, I know I'm funny.

00:25:58.000 --> 00:26:02.319
So if I if I know I already can prove it, I'm I'm in the ring.

00:26:02.880 --> 00:26:05.359
If I'm like, I'm not sure.

00:26:05.599 --> 00:26:10.480
I'm not sure if I am or if I'm not, and I'm not about to get out here and try publicly.

00:26:10.640 --> 00:26:17.599
And one thing that I realized about myself was that I am not one, I'm not achievement motivated.

00:26:17.839 --> 00:26:24.559
And I say that because I want to free some other people who are also not achievement motivated, because the world makes you feel like you should be.

00:26:24.799 --> 00:26:37.759
The world makes you feel like you are supposed to, when you get the product, the thing, the achievement in your hand, you are supposed to be, you know, full of glee about it, and that's supposed to motivate you to keep achieving.

00:26:38.160 --> 00:26:40.079
I'm not achievement motivated.

00:26:40.240 --> 00:26:42.559
I am very much mission motivated.

00:26:42.799 --> 00:26:50.319
If you sit me down and you say, hey, Japlita, listen, I know this is not your natural gift set, but this is the purpose.

00:26:50.559 --> 00:26:56.480
This is this is what this is what God has ordained, and this is why we need you to do this.

00:26:56.640 --> 00:26:57.200
You got me.

00:26:57.279 --> 00:26:59.440
I'm gonna be like, listen, I'm here for the team.

00:26:59.519 --> 00:27:03.599
All right, and I'm gonna, I'm gonna change, we're gonna go change lives.

00:27:03.680 --> 00:27:04.319
Come on, let's go.

00:27:04.480 --> 00:27:08.400
You know, but if you like, hey, you can't do this, and I don't want to.

00:27:08.880 --> 00:27:11.680
You know, but that and this this is very important.

00:27:11.839 --> 00:27:12.880
I didn't mean to cut you off.

00:27:12.960 --> 00:27:13.440
I'm sorry.

00:27:13.599 --> 00:27:14.880
No, you're not cut you off.

00:27:15.279 --> 00:27:15.519
I did.

00:27:15.759 --> 00:27:16.640
No, you're gonna cut.

00:27:17.279 --> 00:27:29.759
Uh this this is exactly like why this I think this leadership style has one of the strengths that it has is that it it often does pay attention to the individual.

00:27:30.000 --> 00:27:36.319
And I think it's a great way to scratch your itch, scratch the hero itch.

00:27:36.720 --> 00:27:37.039
Okay.

00:27:37.279 --> 00:27:37.440
Yeah.

00:27:37.839 --> 00:27:38.960
Yeah, let me be more specific.

00:27:39.359 --> 00:27:41.599
I was I was very not just any itch.

00:27:41.839 --> 00:27:42.480
Yeah, clarify it.

00:27:42.720 --> 00:27:43.680
I don't know where you're itching.

00:27:44.079 --> 00:27:45.680
We're not talking about the other itches, you know.

00:27:45.920 --> 00:27:46.880
No, just this one.

00:27:47.039 --> 00:27:54.240
Um, so the it can it can scratch your hero itch.

00:27:54.319 --> 00:27:55.039
You know what I mean?

00:27:55.200 --> 00:27:58.960
So, like, if you want to be a hero, be a he Okay, I'm sorry.

00:27:59.440 --> 00:28:00.079
Do you lost it?

00:28:00.160 --> 00:28:01.519
Have you lost it and bring it back?

00:28:02.160 --> 00:28:03.759
I'm really I'm really not sure.

00:28:04.480 --> 00:28:06.559
I'm good, not really sure what they're okay.

00:28:06.640 --> 00:28:07.759
Um we're good, we're good.

00:28:07.920 --> 00:28:09.119
We're good, we're good, we're good.

00:28:09.279 --> 00:28:26.000
So, like if you want to if you're like you just you respond to the individual, like if you just need a place to respond, respond to the person, not the situation, respond to who they are.

00:28:26.720 --> 00:28:33.839
And so, because I I understand this need to like if if this is just kind of where you naturally sit.

00:28:34.000 --> 00:28:43.519
And it's funny, as we are talking about this, I really feel like this is more I I think I I think that I have more of this in me than I'm all right, all right.

00:28:43.599 --> 00:28:52.400
If you have been keeping tally, okay, literally every single leadership style, Ruth Abigail's like, wow, this is me.

00:28:52.640 --> 00:28:54.559
No, so okay, hold on.

00:28:54.880 --> 00:29:00.480
This is now that I think about it, now that I'm this is I I see it.

00:29:00.640 --> 00:29:07.920
Because you have to you have to be a little, you have to at some point hit all of this, right?

00:29:08.319 --> 00:29:10.480
Yeah, they they've heard this speech before, but go ahead.

00:29:10.720 --> 00:29:12.880
Yeah, I'm gonna continue to say it because it's true.

00:29:13.119 --> 00:29:16.240
You have to you have to be comfortable doing because it's gonna happen.

00:29:16.319 --> 00:29:18.079
You're gonna have seasons where you gotta be all of this.

00:29:18.160 --> 00:29:24.880
So but I do there's something about this that's resonating me, resonating with me a little bit deeper um than the others.

00:29:25.359 --> 00:29:25.759
Whatever.

00:29:25.839 --> 00:29:26.720
I have not said that before.

00:29:26.799 --> 00:29:28.079
And if I have, whatever.

00:29:28.240 --> 00:29:31.359
Uh so I just but I'm just the one.

00:29:31.920 --> 00:29:32.720
Whatever, you kid.

00:29:33.920 --> 00:29:34.960
It's terrible.

00:29:35.119 --> 00:29:37.279
I'm way too vulnerable on this show.

00:29:37.519 --> 00:29:50.319
Um, but uh I I really I think that if if if you if you if if the response factor is important to you, and it can be, and that's that's not a bad thing.

00:29:51.039 --> 00:29:55.680
Like Queena was saying, respond to the individual, learn who they are, right?

00:29:55.920 --> 00:30:07.599
Uh as opposed to, and that'll help you to understand how to um How to support support them specifically in in the midst of different situations.

00:30:07.920 --> 00:30:11.119
Because a person like Queda doesn't need to be pushed.

00:30:11.279 --> 00:30:14.799
That's not her, you're not gonna get anywhere with that, with her there, right?

00:30:15.200 --> 00:30:16.880
Versus producer joy.

00:30:17.839 --> 00:30:19.200
She likes a challenge.

00:30:19.279 --> 00:30:22.720
And if you take the challenge away, she's gonna be deflated.

00:30:22.880 --> 00:30:24.720
Like, don't do that, right?

00:30:24.960 --> 00:30:25.759
Um wow.

00:30:26.000 --> 00:30:37.440
And so I think like the understanding that about people that you are working with, um, it it can really kind of enhance this leadership style for you, and they'll appreciate it.

00:30:37.680 --> 00:30:54.240
Um, and so I would encourage you, like if you find yourself big leaning towards this or in a situation where you are kind of having to do that all the time because things are constantly changing and you're in transition mode or you have a really young team, right?

00:30:54.400 --> 00:30:58.880
Yeah, instead of responding to the thing, respond to the person.

00:30:59.119 --> 00:31:08.720
Yeah, and that will help them to develop, which is what you need in order to then get out of this particular style and move on to others, right?

00:31:08.960 --> 00:31:09.920
Um, yeah.

00:31:10.240 --> 00:31:37.599
I feel the need to stick up for my non-achievement motivated friends, um, to to the fellow, you know, because I I feel I spent so much of my 20s feeling misunderstood and feeling like it was impossible to be myself because I felt like I was constantly being told who you are is gonna lead you nowhere.

00:31:37.839 --> 00:31:38.240
Right?

00:31:38.480 --> 00:31:43.920
Who you are is gonna is gonna land you in a sea of regrets.

00:31:44.319 --> 00:31:57.440
And so I spent a lot of my 20s trying to put on other people's armor, you know, put on other people's, like, oh, like, oh, well, their gifting looks good and and their personality looks great and who they are.

00:31:57.599 --> 00:32:01.519
And I I spent a good bit of my 20s feeling honestly miserable.

00:32:01.759 --> 00:32:39.039
Um, and I it it took me, but I will say growing out of out of feeling like I had to be someone, look like someone different, the process of growing out of that is what gave me the material to be able to talk to young leaders now and to see where people really are, and to and to give uh to give language to who they are, because there's a lot of people who don't yet understand exactly why they work the way that they work, because they feel like they don't work like everyone else.

00:32:39.279 --> 00:32:39.759
That's right.

00:32:40.000 --> 00:32:53.119
That they are not, that they don't sit within the majority of people, you know, and and they don't know how to activate potential um because everyone around them is telling you you gotta do it this way.

00:32:53.359 --> 00:32:55.359
And they're like, I'm not that person.

00:32:55.519 --> 00:33:09.440
Yeah, um, and I think that if you are a leader that is working with someone that you just can't seem to motivate, I think one, you are going to have to learn how to ask different questions.

00:33:09.759 --> 00:33:10.400
Absolutely.

00:33:10.640 --> 00:33:17.200
You know, I think that the because the questions that uh I tended to get asked were why can't you just get it?

00:33:17.440 --> 00:33:19.759
Um, why don't you understand this?

00:33:19.920 --> 00:33:25.599
You know, what is it that you don't, what is it that you, you know, you're supposed to learn by, oh, this was my favorite.

00:33:25.680 --> 00:33:28.000
You're supposed to learn by observing me.

00:33:28.480 --> 00:33:32.400
And when you observe me, then you will pick up everything you need.

00:33:32.480 --> 00:33:48.400
And I remember just watching, like, I think you want me to see there is something that you are intending to portray that you think that I should see, and then I repeat.

00:33:48.720 --> 00:33:49.200
Right.

00:33:49.519 --> 00:33:55.519
But my mind is always thinking of how can I do something different?

00:33:55.759 --> 00:33:58.160
How can I, how can I improve something?

00:33:58.319 --> 00:34:04.240
How what's the my mind is always in a moment that's beyond the moment that we're in, right?

00:34:04.400 --> 00:34:11.039
And so instead of you saying, instead of you taking a step back and saying, okay, who is this person?

00:34:11.599 --> 00:34:14.400
And how can I help them be a better them?

00:34:15.039 --> 00:34:17.840
And not how can I help them become me?

00:34:18.320 --> 00:34:34.320
That's and I think a lot of times in leadership we lose people because they realize when they get to the point where they realize that your leadership can only extend to to help replicate yourself.

00:34:34.559 --> 00:34:38.639
And when a person realizes I wanna be you, man, that's real, they gone.

00:34:38.880 --> 00:34:39.280
That's it.

00:34:39.440 --> 00:34:54.719
Yep, they gone, they don't trust you anymore, they don't receive from you anymore, they they they've moved on, yep, and you have got to get to a point, and this is regardless of what your leadership style is.

00:34:55.039 --> 00:35:04.719
We all have got to get to a point where we are really interested in getting to know and wanting to develop who people are.

00:35:04.880 --> 00:35:18.320
The Lord already did the creating, He already did the this person's gonna have this this temperament, this personality style, this gift set, this, this, this, and that.

00:35:18.480 --> 00:35:20.239
The Lord already did that.

00:35:20.559 --> 00:35:27.840
You don't get to go back in and then say, you know what, you just something's missing, and I think it's me.

00:35:32.320 --> 00:35:32.960
That's real.

00:35:33.119 --> 00:35:45.840
Oh, no, that's not gonna be the right response because ultimately, what people really want to feel is that they are able to thrive under your leadership, regardless of what your leadership style is.

00:35:46.000 --> 00:35:50.719
And I do think situational can work for that in some respects.

00:35:50.880 --> 00:36:02.559
I think that that's actually a strength of theirs because they're looking person to person and saying, okay, this is what they need, and this is what they need, and this is this is who I'm gonna be to them, and this is who I'm gonna be to them, you know.

00:36:02.960 --> 00:36:16.400
But I think that there's also a potential, if you misread the person, you're gonna misdiagnose them, and you're gonna take them through a rigor marot that they didn't necessarily need.

00:36:16.639 --> 00:36:36.159
And as a person that has been made to go through many a rigor marot, okay, and still still left feeling like, because I left feeling like, okay, okay, once again, I gotta prove myself, I gotta try to help people understand who I am, and and you know, I at at some point I'm gonna stop doing that.

00:36:36.480 --> 00:36:38.480
Yeah, yeah, and you should.

00:36:38.719 --> 00:36:53.119
I mean, I think you made a great, I think you said something that is very key that I have found is not the strength of many leaders, including myself until I learned how to do it and I put effort into it.

00:36:53.519 --> 00:36:55.360
Um, and that's asking questions.

00:36:56.000 --> 00:37:01.599
I I think that we don't know how to do that well.

00:37:02.079 --> 00:37:14.639
Um you know, and I probably the art of asking questions I probably started leaning into learning about that maybe uh about I don't know, four or five years ago.

00:37:15.280 --> 00:37:30.639
And um it is the best it it was the best thing that I could have done as a leader is to learn how to ask questions, good questions, not not just not you know, not not not simple questions, but questions that are gonna get to the heart of the matter.

00:37:30.880 --> 00:37:36.079
Um and and quickly, you don't need a long time to get there, right?

00:37:36.400 --> 00:37:39.760
But part of doing that is is listening.

00:37:40.880 --> 00:37:42.960
We people just don't listen.

00:37:43.199 --> 00:37:52.639
And I think that if you listen and you and you observe, you'll know what questions to ask and when to ask them, right?

00:37:52.880 --> 00:37:57.360
Um, I'm not saying you won't be perfect all the time, but it's worth it's worth trying.

00:37:57.519 --> 00:38:05.920
Uh I'll I'll give a little tip um that I learned that I've told people uh helped to coach people on how to ask questions.

00:38:06.079 --> 00:38:12.639
And I I don't know, I think I'm gonna do something on this eventually, just because it's something that's really helped me um as a leader.

00:38:12.719 --> 00:38:17.599
And I and I've I've had a lot of people who have responded to this well.

00:38:18.000 --> 00:38:23.920
But um most of us ask questions that are are close-ended.

00:38:24.000 --> 00:38:25.760
We don't even realize we're doing it, right?

00:38:26.159 --> 00:38:30.639
Um, and and so though those questions, this is a simple trick.

00:38:30.800 --> 00:38:41.920
If you are a leader and you're asking questions that begin with uh do or have, um, you're asking a close-ended question every time.

00:38:42.639 --> 00:38:42.960
Wow.

00:38:43.199 --> 00:38:44.559
Do you know how to do this?

00:38:45.199 --> 00:38:46.159
Have you done this?

00:38:46.960 --> 00:38:48.079
Have you seen this?

00:38:48.559 --> 00:38:51.760
Do you uh what do you think about this?

00:38:52.000 --> 00:38:52.800
No, no, what do you?

00:38:52.880 --> 00:38:53.360
That's wrong.

00:38:53.519 --> 00:38:55.599
Do you do you think this about this, right?

00:38:56.239 --> 00:38:58.000
Those those are closed-ended questions.

00:38:58.079 --> 00:39:00.559
They're easy, they're the first ones that come to our minds.

00:39:00.880 --> 00:39:06.079
Um, and you don't give people, you don't allow them to think, right?

00:39:06.320 --> 00:39:07.280
That doesn't help.

00:39:07.760 --> 00:39:21.679
So if you can replace any question that you want to use uh do or have with a what or a how, you will immediately shift it into an open-ended question, right?

00:39:22.079 --> 00:39:27.360
Um and then you can charge for this, you're engaging.

00:39:27.760 --> 00:39:34.079
I might now then you're engaging the mind, right, of the person you're talking to.

00:39:34.320 --> 00:39:48.000
So it so they are not leaning on you to respond, they have to respond, and you don't it's not it's not a cop-out for you to be able to be the hero.

00:39:48.239 --> 00:39:57.599
Because if you ask them a closed-ended question and it ends that conversation ends, it gives you a quicker, it gives you a chance to talk more than you should.

00:39:57.920 --> 00:40:02.639
But if you ask an open-ended question, it gives you an open chance to listen more, right?

00:40:04.480 --> 00:40:05.440
All right, I'm gonna stop.

00:40:05.599 --> 00:40:06.719
I hope that made sense.

00:40:07.119 --> 00:40:20.000
I hope it's so literally just change if before you ask, ask if you're about to say do, shift to a what or a how or who a what, how, who, when or why really will work.

00:40:20.079 --> 00:40:21.599
But I like what or who.

00:40:21.760 --> 00:40:23.519
I mean what or uh what did I say?

00:40:23.760 --> 00:40:24.719
What or how?

00:40:25.039 --> 00:40:26.480
Those are really, really good.

00:40:26.719 --> 00:40:30.159
Um when is a great accountability, right?

00:40:30.480 --> 00:40:35.440
Uh have you done this is is is is a different question than when do you want to do this?

00:40:35.679 --> 00:40:40.159
That's a whole different conversation as opposed to asking, have you done something?

00:40:40.400 --> 00:40:40.880
Shifting.

00:40:41.039 --> 00:40:41.840
Wow, right?

00:40:42.079 --> 00:40:44.880
Or when when when do you expect when do you expect to get it done?

00:40:44.960 --> 00:40:45.280
I'm done.

00:40:45.440 --> 00:40:46.000
Okay, go ahead.

00:40:46.159 --> 00:40:47.119
No, no, no, no.

00:40:47.199 --> 00:40:48.480
That that was good.

00:40:48.880 --> 00:40:49.280
All right.

00:40:49.360 --> 00:40:51.599
I hope y'all enjoyed that free tidbit.

00:40:51.920 --> 00:40:54.239
We'll be back with the workshops later.

00:40:54.480 --> 00:40:57.519
Okay, we'll we'll be back with we'll be back.

00:40:57.679 --> 00:41:00.320
Listen, we can come to a team near you.

00:41:00.800 --> 00:41:01.119
Okay.

00:41:03.119 --> 00:41:04.000
We sure can.

00:41:04.159 --> 00:41:06.559
We sure because you know what?

00:41:06.639 --> 00:41:17.760
I think that what you are pointing at is as a leader, you have to be mindful when you are talking with your team.

00:41:18.079 --> 00:41:21.599
Am I pointing it back to them or am I pointing it to me?

00:41:21.840 --> 00:41:22.239
That's it.

00:41:22.320 --> 00:41:23.039
That's correct.

00:41:23.360 --> 00:41:28.559
Am I am I am I asking a question simply so that I can again heroic?

00:41:28.639 --> 00:41:29.360
I asked a question.

00:41:29.599 --> 00:41:30.719
Yeah, to yeah.

00:41:30.880 --> 00:41:34.159
Like I'm just all right, you haven't talked in a while.

00:41:34.400 --> 00:41:36.639
So let me just correct.

00:41:36.719 --> 00:41:42.159
Like, you know, you know, let me let them feel involved and like they're participating.

00:41:42.400 --> 00:41:42.880
Exactly.

00:41:44.000 --> 00:41:50.000
Am I asking a question because there's something that they have that can make us all better?

00:41:50.159 --> 00:41:50.559
Yep.

00:41:50.719 --> 00:41:56.880
And it's it's time for me to shift the stage and allow them to take center stage.

00:41:57.039 --> 00:41:57.599
That's right.

00:41:57.840 --> 00:42:00.480
Why, why are you asking the question?

00:42:00.719 --> 00:42:04.320
I think your motive will determine the outcome.

00:42:04.639 --> 00:42:17.760
And I think that if you are naturally trying to develop your team members, you are not you are naturally gonna ask these what and what is it, what and how questions.

00:42:18.480 --> 00:42:26.239
You're naturally gonna ask those type of questions because you are wanting them to become and not just do.

00:42:26.480 --> 00:42:26.960
That's right.

00:42:27.199 --> 00:42:30.719
And what's and I know that I'm sorry, that's my transformational leadership style coming out.

00:42:31.280 --> 00:42:31.840
Yeah, that's real.

00:42:32.639 --> 00:42:43.119
But but when you when you are focusing on their development and not just their ability to do what you say, oh God, that's it.

00:42:43.199 --> 00:42:44.159
Not for real.

00:42:44.400 --> 00:42:54.800
I I just can we go back to the burnout thing that you said, uh, because I think that all like you what you just said, like, are you doing this for them or for you?

00:42:55.119 --> 00:43:06.480
Um and you know, when you focus too much on you, you do get burned out because it it you never again, the situational leader.

00:43:09.199 --> 00:43:21.280
If you're the only one that can respond to the fire, you you you've put yourself and your team in a really precarious position because at some point you won't be able to respond.

00:43:21.679 --> 00:43:29.039
And if you haven't allowed them to do so and train them in a way for them to handle it, the next time a fire comes, it's just gonna burn it down.

00:43:29.440 --> 00:43:30.639
Nobody will know what to do.

00:43:31.119 --> 00:43:31.679
Yeah.

00:43:31.920 --> 00:43:35.440
And so you you you know, you gotta be careful about that.

00:43:35.599 --> 00:43:36.960
Like we have to be careful about it.

00:43:37.039 --> 00:43:44.400
Sometimes, yes, it takes you and you have to do it, but if it takes you all the time, you gotta check that.

00:43:44.480 --> 00:43:49.440
You gotta ask yourself, why do I need to be in every situation?

00:43:50.320 --> 00:43:54.559
And then here's the other thing that you have to be careful about.

00:43:54.960 --> 00:44:00.559
I think I I used to have a blog, it was called Lead This Heart.

00:44:00.719 --> 00:44:03.440
Um, and I used to do like an online blog, you know.

00:44:03.599 --> 00:44:11.199
It was in one of my, you know, I'm trying to find myself uh stages of life, but I a lot of those blogs were really, really good.

00:44:11.440 --> 00:44:11.840
Yeah.

00:44:12.800 --> 00:44:25.920
But I I I I you as a leader, and I think this is something we're gonna talk about in our special episode coming up, but you have to be attentive to your own heart.

00:44:26.239 --> 00:44:27.039
Because what happens?

00:44:27.280 --> 00:44:33.599
Yeah, my God, yeah, when a leader gets burnt out, man, the blame game comes up.

00:44:34.320 --> 00:44:38.239
It's I wouldn't be burnt out if these people knew how to da-da-da-da-da.

00:44:38.480 --> 00:44:40.800
And why am I the only one that da-da-da-da-da?

00:44:41.199 --> 00:44:43.679
And you mean to tell me nobody could da da da?

00:44:44.320 --> 00:44:46.159
And why why am I the only one?

00:44:46.320 --> 00:44:57.840
And it's like, babe, because you created an atmosphere where no one feels comfortable becoming the person that that can do and be.

00:44:58.320 --> 00:45:01.920
And so you blame the people that you've handicapped.

00:45:05.519 --> 00:45:06.159
Yeah.

00:45:06.639 --> 00:45:08.320
Because we we do it.

00:45:08.559 --> 00:45:11.199
You you blame the people that you stifled.

00:45:11.360 --> 00:45:11.840
You're correct.

00:45:11.920 --> 00:45:22.320
That's absolutely you blame the people that you won't let move, you won't let grow, you won't let fly, you keeping them stuck in the nest, and then you're like, Well, I gotta carry everybody.

00:45:22.480 --> 00:45:22.960
Right.

00:45:25.119 --> 00:45:26.639
Baby, that's right.

00:45:27.119 --> 00:45:33.840
That you have to allow people to get into the arena and work out.

00:45:34.000 --> 00:45:47.440
You gotta allow them to build muscle, you gotta create safe situations where they can be in places and develop, you know, and you have to be able to recognize when someone is in a safe space.

00:45:47.599 --> 00:45:54.719
You have to, and you may, you may be the type of leader that has to say to yourself, they're okay, we're okay.

00:45:54.960 --> 00:46:00.880
If something falls right there, they're gonna learn how to pick it up and it's going to be okay.

00:46:01.119 --> 00:46:01.440
Yep.

00:46:01.599 --> 00:46:02.960
And you have to let them go.

00:46:03.119 --> 00:46:07.199
I have actually been told by a couple of people.

00:46:07.440 --> 00:46:29.280
I remember uh there have been times when I've been told and I've seen other people being told, like, oh, it there was this opportunity, but you know, we decided you weren't ready.

00:46:29.840 --> 00:46:35.760
You know, and I look back on that because at the time I felt ashamed.

00:46:36.239 --> 00:46:43.119
I felt like God didn't think me special enough, like that, he couldn't work with what I had.

00:46:44.000 --> 00:46:48.719
And we think that we're keeping people safe when we're really crippling them.

00:46:48.960 --> 00:46:49.280
Yeah.

00:46:49.679 --> 00:47:02.079
Because when you refuse to allow me to work out the muscles that will allow me to enter into the bigger arenas one day, you my muscles begin to atrophy.

00:47:02.320 --> 00:47:03.440
Atrophy, yeah, for sure.

00:47:03.679 --> 00:47:04.480
You know what I'm saying?

00:47:04.800 --> 00:47:16.239
Like something, something in me is literally dying because you won't allow me into the space that will develop and strengthen me and who I am.

00:47:16.480 --> 00:47:16.880
Yeah.

00:47:17.519 --> 00:47:21.840
And again, you don't want to be the leader that people are fleeing.

00:47:23.280 --> 00:47:25.440
Because I'm not gonna sit here and die.

00:47:26.079 --> 00:47:28.159
No, you're gonna no, you're gonna move.

00:47:28.480 --> 00:47:29.360
I have to go.

00:47:29.599 --> 00:47:30.480
You're gonna move.

00:47:30.639 --> 00:47:30.960
Yeah.

00:47:31.199 --> 00:47:37.920
Um, so so yeah, this is I I I I need to And not to say, sorry, just to correct something.

00:47:38.079 --> 00:47:39.599
Sometimes you really aren't ready.

00:47:40.000 --> 00:47:40.400
For sure.

00:47:40.960 --> 00:47:43.280
Sometimes there's some things that you really aren't ready for.

00:47:43.440 --> 00:47:51.039
I I think I think something to be I I'm glad you said that because the thought that I had was like, um look at look at character, not skill.

00:47:51.199 --> 00:47:52.960
I mean, it it skill can be developed.

00:47:53.199 --> 00:47:54.880
You can do that, you can figure that out.

00:47:54.960 --> 00:48:04.320
But if your character is not right, if you won't if you don't have a level of maturity, then that could be that could be different, right?

00:48:04.559 --> 00:48:09.280
Um, but the skill part is like you can figure that out.

00:48:09.440 --> 00:48:09.840
Yeah.

00:48:10.159 --> 00:48:10.480
Yeah.

00:48:10.719 --> 00:48:12.559
Can I say something about character real quick?

00:48:12.880 --> 00:48:13.360
Yeah.

00:48:13.840 --> 00:48:23.280
Again, for any leader, because I've a character, if if anybody knows me, character is probably the word that comes out my mouth the most, right?

00:48:23.599 --> 00:48:30.719
But make sure, because again, character is neither good nor bad, it's either developed or underdeveloped, right?

00:48:31.119 --> 00:48:37.119
Make sure you're not judging the parts of their character off of your own reflection.

00:48:37.360 --> 00:48:38.559
Sure, yeah.

00:48:38.800 --> 00:48:49.840
Give people a give people a fair survey, not according to you uh you trying to figure out who they are as a reflection of you.

00:48:50.079 --> 00:48:51.039
Yes, oh for sure.

00:48:52.079 --> 00:48:54.800
Give people a fair survey, right?

00:48:54.960 --> 00:48:59.280
Is it a character issue or is it an opportunity issue?

00:48:59.519 --> 00:49:20.239
And that's where you have to make that, and and I think it's incumbent upon leaders that we be making uh we we literally hold because leadership comes with power and authority, you are literally holding the door for the people that you are are serving.

00:49:20.800 --> 00:49:21.199
Yeah.

00:49:21.440 --> 00:49:23.119
You're holding the door for them.

00:49:23.360 --> 00:49:26.159
You are the one who's saying, okay, listen, come on through this door.

00:49:26.320 --> 00:49:28.880
Are you the one saying, hey, you can't go through this door yet?

00:49:29.039 --> 00:49:34.239
And you have the there is a great deal of responsibility that comes with that.

00:49:34.400 --> 00:49:42.559
And I think that we need to be more mindful of how we are monitoring that door that allows people access to their next level.

00:49:44.880 --> 00:49:45.440
Yes.

00:49:46.239 --> 00:49:48.480
Um no, no, that's good.

00:49:48.639 --> 00:49:56.800
No, I I um I I want to say a another, I want to quit the two you you would you you talked to to the to the non-achievers.

00:49:56.960 --> 00:49:59.039
I'd like to talk to the achievers for a second, all right.

00:49:59.119 --> 00:50:00.400
As as a fellow achiever.

00:50:02.159 --> 00:50:05.280
Oh boy, I'm just way too vulnerable on this.

00:50:05.519 --> 00:50:07.440
Um so I love it.

00:50:08.400 --> 00:50:14.079
As an achiever, uh, and and and a lot of achievers are performative.

00:50:14.320 --> 00:50:19.360
We we like, I mean, our our our work is our stage.

00:50:20.000 --> 00:50:22.559
Um, and if I'm honest, that's the case for me, right?

00:50:22.719 --> 00:50:23.920
My work is my stage.

00:50:24.559 --> 00:50:29.280
Um and I like to do well.

00:50:30.559 --> 00:50:35.360
A lot of times achievers are put as leaders because they've achieved.

00:50:36.239 --> 00:50:36.559
Okay.

00:50:37.440 --> 00:50:44.719
And you have to be, it is it is very important to understand that achievement does not equal good leadership.

00:50:45.360 --> 00:51:01.760
And when you are put into a leadership position because of your own achievements, this type of leadership style can be very dangerous because you uh haven't yet learned how not to be center stage.

00:51:01.840 --> 00:51:02.880
We talked about this earlier, right?

00:51:03.039 --> 00:51:03.760
The star of the show.

00:51:04.719 --> 00:51:22.719
But part of the reason, this is, and I think this is this is where you have to be honest with yourself that we we like to uh to do the type of leadership that is more situational where we can kind of come to the rescue or be the hero is because as achievers, we like doing what we know how to do.

00:51:24.239 --> 00:51:26.400
What you have to learn how to do is something new.

00:51:28.800 --> 00:51:41.039
The one of the reasons that I think um situational leaders can get in trouble is that you are you're not just responding, you're responding to things you know how to respond to.

00:51:42.239 --> 00:51:51.920
And when you and as a leader, your job is not to do that, your job is to um is to is to step back, is to look.

00:51:52.159 --> 00:52:00.719
You gotta you gotta kind of come from the uh come from the grass tops to the treetops and be able your perspective needs to shift.

00:52:01.199 --> 00:52:05.039
And sometimes achievement looks like being still, right?

00:52:05.119 --> 00:52:07.920
And achievers have a hard time not being still.

00:52:08.159 --> 00:52:13.679
We like to be moving, we like to be doing things, we like to be achieving, we like to be the next goal, the next thing.

00:52:14.480 --> 00:52:28.000
And sometimes it's uh it's it's being still and watching and and and being discerning and asking questions and thinking um and supporting, right, and encouraging.

00:52:28.079 --> 00:52:29.280
It's not doing.

00:52:29.920 --> 00:52:35.360
And so if but we are sometimes we can be so insecure.

00:52:35.519 --> 00:52:56.239
I have been insecure in my and in in I will insecure as a person, more insecure as an achiever, as an achieving leader, that I I have um sometimes not unintentionally put myself in a position to where um I'm doing more than I should because I don't know what else to do.

00:52:56.960 --> 00:53:01.599
And that is frustrating as an achiever, right?

00:53:02.079 --> 00:53:05.039
Um it's because I don't know what else to do other than achieve.

00:53:05.119 --> 00:53:07.679
I don't know what it means to not achieve.

00:53:07.760 --> 00:53:11.519
So I'm just gonna keep achieving even if it's trampling over your development.

00:53:12.800 --> 00:53:14.880
And that's bad, and that's not good, right?

00:53:15.119 --> 00:53:18.719
Well, that's not good.

00:53:19.199 --> 00:53:32.719
So for those of you who are like me who struggle with that, if you're a high achiever and you find yourself in a leadership role, then what my challenge is is to slow down and step back and stop doing.

00:53:33.519 --> 00:53:34.719
You gotta stop doing.

00:53:35.440 --> 00:53:36.480
You gotta stop.

00:53:37.119 --> 00:53:42.880
And even if even if it feels so anti-it's the tension, because it will it will feel that way.

00:53:42.960 --> 00:53:46.480
The tension inside of you is like, no, no, no, but I have to do, I have to do.

00:53:46.719 --> 00:53:52.639
No, just don't like like um go against your nature in that in that space, right?

00:53:52.800 --> 00:53:53.840
Go against your nature.

00:53:54.000 --> 00:54:01.360
What if you're if you if something is telling you to do something actively, don't do and watch it get done.

00:54:02.159 --> 00:54:03.519
Watch it get done.

00:54:05.360 --> 00:54:07.760
And that's something I tell myself, I gotta tell myself that all the time.

00:54:08.000 --> 00:54:08.239
I don't know.

00:54:08.559 --> 00:54:09.760
Like real talk.

00:54:11.039 --> 00:54:14.719
I might pay to sponsor this episode because I want this one to go out.

00:54:15.039 --> 00:54:18.480
The people need to hear this one right here.

00:54:18.800 --> 00:54:30.480
They need because I think we have identified spaces that not only leaders, but people who serve under leaders where we get where we get stuck.

00:54:30.800 --> 00:54:39.039
You know, I if I I think that we who are not achievement motivated, this is why I keep Ruth and Joy around.

00:54:39.280 --> 00:54:39.519
Sure.

00:54:39.760 --> 00:54:41.920
You know, like you need to be influenced.

00:54:42.079 --> 00:54:55.440
I I can honestly say, I can honestly say that if I did not have the friends and the people around me that I have, I'd be somewhere full of visions and goals.

00:54:55.599 --> 00:54:56.000
That's right.

00:54:56.159 --> 00:54:57.679
And maybe not a lot of movement.

00:54:57.840 --> 00:55:05.599
I have had to learn, I'm not achievement-oriented, but I have had to learn how to keep moving.

00:55:06.159 --> 00:55:15.280
Like I've had to learn how, like, I'm I'm not necessarily trying to get to to a next goal, but I'm I have to get to my next level of impact.

00:55:15.519 --> 00:55:20.480
I have to get to the place where my gift has the proper stage.

00:55:21.039 --> 00:55:21.360
Right.

00:55:21.440 --> 00:55:40.000
I I and and the proper, and I have to make sure that I'm continuing because you it is uh I I'm you can develop and grow and have no position, have no impact, and just be a person who knows a bunch of stuff and can articulate things well, but you don't have a platform.

00:55:40.159 --> 00:55:44.400
Yeah or you don't have people who can listen and follow, you don't have impact.

00:55:44.719 --> 00:55:52.000
Um, and so I think it's important that we bring these two communities of people together.

00:55:52.159 --> 00:56:02.239
You know, you need people who are intuitive, mission focused, you know, uh maybe can seem to be in the clouds.

00:56:02.960 --> 00:56:09.840
You need those people who with you need them to join together with our ground people, with our doers, our movers.

00:56:10.320 --> 00:56:17.599
And um, and we we need each other because again, me and Ruth Abigail's scripture, iron sharpens iron.

00:56:17.760 --> 00:56:18.000
Absolutely.

00:56:18.239 --> 00:56:19.360
And you need that.

00:56:19.679 --> 00:56:20.880
And you need that.

00:56:21.199 --> 00:56:25.280
Um I would not be who I was without it.

00:56:25.519 --> 00:56:26.960
No, I and I wouldn't either.

00:56:27.039 --> 00:56:40.320
And I I I I can say like, you know, people, it's funny, I always joke, like a a lot of I have a lot of friends who are who are like Jaquita who are that have that kind of personality.

00:56:40.559 --> 00:56:54.000
Um and it has helped me to um it has really helped me to value people and value process that I I don't necessarily always do.

00:56:54.239 --> 00:56:58.719
Like I value I I naturally value results and I want to just see it done.

00:56:59.199 --> 00:57:03.039
Uh, but the process is is I would probably say more important.

00:57:03.199 --> 00:57:16.159
Um and it has helped me to to see the process of things and um and to value that and to value that in people and to be patient, like and um and to be patient with myself, right?

00:57:16.239 --> 00:57:19.039
Like, I mean, and and allow myself to to go through the process.

00:57:19.119 --> 00:57:23.039
I think uh I think there's there's there's huge upside to that.

00:57:23.119 --> 00:57:25.519
And I wouldn't I wouldn't be able to do that without the people around me.

00:57:25.679 --> 00:57:27.760
Like yeah, I that's not how I'm naturally wired.

00:57:27.920 --> 00:57:40.880
I also think God intentionally, and I I I don't I I've I don't know, I've thought this for years, put me working with people in ministry and in people development to mold that in me.

00:57:41.039 --> 00:57:54.960
Because if I was in an environment where it was results, results, results, the person that I am would be a lot, I would be a lot more um hardened uh towards people.

00:57:55.119 --> 00:57:55.440
Yeah.

00:57:55.679 --> 00:58:03.599
And I think that God put me in ministry because it's not something that I would have ever, I honestly didn't want to be in it.

00:58:03.679 --> 00:58:03.840
Yeah.

00:58:03.920 --> 00:58:07.280
Um, and I I didn't have no really, no real desire to work with people.

00:58:07.519 --> 00:58:20.960
Um, but I think God put that in it to soften my my heart towards people and soften my heart towards people's process and so and and and and allow me to uh value what he values, which is people.

00:58:21.280 --> 00:58:24.639
Um, and that's something I've had to learn uh as a leader.

00:58:24.719 --> 00:58:37.119
And I think you know, that's why leadership is so important to me because I y'all, I'm like I I sit here, we have these conversations, but you know, I think I can speak for both me and Queita.

00:58:37.360 --> 00:58:42.320
Like when we leave here, this is like we are speaking in real time for both of us.

00:58:42.480 --> 00:58:47.280
Like this is not this is not stuff that we're just like, oh, this would be good to talk about.

00:58:47.360 --> 00:58:50.559
This is like digging up stuff, you know what I'm saying?

00:58:51.119 --> 00:58:52.559
Girl, for real.

00:58:53.119 --> 00:58:53.760
Like for real.

00:58:54.079 --> 00:58:57.760
I was like as I as we were talking today, I was like, oh crap, all right.

00:58:58.000 --> 00:59:06.159
Next seriously, like you know, gosh, especially now that I've been through like these healing classes, and I'm just like, oh, found another route, need to dig that up.

00:59:07.599 --> 00:59:16.719
You know, I don't I don't think we're not speaking from, hey, you know, let me tell you what I've what I've been through, and you know, and here's some here's some jewels.

00:59:17.039 --> 00:59:21.039
We're like, man, girl, I just unearthed this just now on this on this podcast.

00:59:21.280 --> 00:59:36.559
Like right now, yeah, like like right in the moment, you know, and I think thank you for uh mentioning because I think that for those of you that are not achievement focused, like you know, like you're not constantly like in a state of production, production, production.

00:59:36.960 --> 00:59:42.719
Your ability, you have to know your superpower because it can be a little harder to find.

00:59:43.119 --> 00:59:45.760
Uh I'm trying to tell you what I've been through.

00:59:46.000 --> 00:59:52.559
It can be a little bit harder to identify because everybody else, it seems like they're moving at the speed of light.

00:59:52.800 --> 00:59:56.079
And you back here somewhere trying to figure out where your piece is at.

00:59:56.239 --> 00:59:57.039
That's true.

00:59:57.599 --> 00:59:59.599
Understand being the person.

01:00:00.239 --> 01:00:04.559
That understands how to properly process people.

01:00:05.039 --> 01:00:07.440
How like because you know what it's like.

01:00:07.679 --> 01:00:12.239
You spent so much time thinking and uncovering process.

01:00:12.320 --> 01:00:15.679
You know, like when I look back on my life, my friend, I used to get on everybody's nerves.

01:00:15.920 --> 01:00:22.000
When I found personality, I was like, guys, I now understand everyone.

01:00:22.239 --> 01:00:22.559
Okay.

01:00:23.119 --> 01:00:25.039
Let me let me tell you all.

01:00:25.119 --> 01:00:26.880
I they didn't need to take a test.

01:00:27.199 --> 01:00:31.440
I literally told everyone what their personality was.

01:00:31.760 --> 01:00:34.000
And I I began walking them through.

01:00:34.159 --> 01:00:38.159
When I found uh lifestyle, uh it's called life languages.

01:00:38.239 --> 01:00:38.880
I did that.

01:00:38.960 --> 01:00:51.599
You know, anytime I find something that helps me to understand people, people's circumstances, situations better, I'm able to walk people through their becoming stage.

01:00:51.760 --> 01:00:53.840
Because I but I had to go through my own.

01:00:54.079 --> 01:00:59.840
I had to go through my own, and that gave me the language to be able to help other people to walk through theirs.

01:01:00.079 --> 01:01:01.840
You have to know your superpower.

01:01:02.079 --> 01:01:08.239
Everybody has the has the ability to be a hero, but not if you don't know what it is you bring into the table.

01:01:08.480 --> 01:01:13.440
You can't you can't step up on the Avengers and be like, hey guys, I don't quite yet know what I do.

01:01:13.519 --> 01:01:13.679
Right.

01:01:13.920 --> 01:01:18.639
You know, can I cap, can I borrow the shield, uh, Black Panther, let me get in a suit.

01:01:18.719 --> 01:01:20.000
And nobody's giving you their sense.

01:01:20.159 --> 01:01:20.400
That's real.

01:01:20.880 --> 01:01:25.599
You gotta find your own sign and you have to come in articulating who you are.

01:01:25.760 --> 01:01:32.000
I just uh Civil Wars, Captain America's Civil War, where they're all like fighting each other.

01:01:32.719 --> 01:01:34.719
Right, and this is where we get new characters.

01:01:34.800 --> 01:01:35.840
We get Ant-Man.

01:01:36.000 --> 01:01:38.079
And everybody's like, yo, who this dude?

01:01:38.639 --> 01:01:41.519
You know, like he can get small, he can get big.

01:01:41.679 --> 01:01:43.679
Now we got new people on the team, right?

01:01:43.760 --> 01:01:50.079
But you have to be able, if you gonna step up to the team, you gotta be able, you gotta be able to tell me what you do.

01:01:50.320 --> 01:01:50.719
What do you do?

01:01:50.800 --> 01:01:52.000
Yeah, what do you do?

01:01:52.480 --> 01:01:53.440
Yeah what do you do?

01:01:53.599 --> 01:01:55.840
What you got, you know, what does your suit do?

01:01:56.000 --> 01:01:58.079
What's the purpose of your armor?

01:01:58.320 --> 01:01:58.559
Right.

01:01:58.639 --> 01:02:02.719
What's the you know, uh when we're looking at X-Men, yo, why you gotta wear goggles?

01:02:02.880 --> 01:02:04.800
Yeah, you know, what what are those for?

01:02:04.960 --> 01:02:08.960
You have to be able to articulate, and that's the 20s.

01:02:09.039 --> 01:02:12.639
The 20s is finding those things and being like, oh, what's this?

01:02:12.800 --> 01:02:18.320
And the 30s is saying, hey guys, I think I'm starting to get some language to be able to explain this.

01:02:18.559 --> 01:02:22.159
And when me and Ruth Abigail hit the 40s, we'll be back with you to show you.

01:02:22.559 --> 01:02:23.039
We'll let you know.

01:02:23.440 --> 01:02:23.920
We'll let you know.

01:02:24.239 --> 01:02:24.639
We'll let you know.

01:02:24.880 --> 01:02:25.440
We're not there yet.

01:02:25.920 --> 01:02:27.519
We're not there, we're not there.

01:02:27.760 --> 01:02:29.039
Um, this is good.

01:02:29.119 --> 01:02:29.360
Thank you.

01:02:29.679 --> 01:02:30.159
This is good.

01:02:30.320 --> 01:02:31.519
Um, this was good.

01:02:31.760 --> 01:02:34.079
Uh yeah, I think I think I think we're done.

01:02:34.239 --> 01:02:36.159
Um, those are leadership styles, friends.

01:02:36.559 --> 01:02:36.880
There you go.

01:02:36.960 --> 01:02:38.000
That's leadership styles.

01:02:38.159 --> 01:02:45.519
And uh, hey, hey, like we always say, if this is of value to you, what they gonna do?

01:02:46.239 --> 01:02:49.519
Listen, friends, you're gonna come in and you're gonna join the community, okay?

01:02:49.760 --> 01:02:50.320
That's what you're gonna do.

01:02:50.480 --> 01:02:51.599
You're gonna like, okay.

01:02:51.760 --> 01:02:52.639
Hit the heart.

01:02:52.960 --> 01:02:53.519
Hit the heart.

01:02:54.079 --> 01:02:54.559
Hit the heart.

01:02:58.000 --> 01:02:58.800
Yeah, the like button.

01:02:59.039 --> 01:03:04.400
You know how many people tell me, man, I listened to your video like five times, and I go back and I check.

01:03:04.480 --> 01:03:04.639
Right.

01:03:05.199 --> 01:03:06.800
Man, they they must have liked it.

01:03:06.960 --> 01:03:07.440
Nothing.

01:03:08.000 --> 01:03:17.599
Okay, hit the like, you know, and and and honestly, we need to know what what resonates with you guys, yeah, what hits so we can give you more of what works.

01:03:17.760 --> 01:03:18.000
Right.

01:03:18.320 --> 01:03:20.079
You know, um, yeah, let us know.

01:03:20.480 --> 01:03:22.000
Please like, share.

01:03:22.239 --> 01:03:24.000
If you share, tag us in it.

01:03:24.079 --> 01:03:26.559
You know, we just we this is community.

01:03:26.639 --> 01:03:28.719
We want to interact and engage with you guys.

01:03:28.960 --> 01:03:31.519
So like, share, and for sure subscribe.

01:03:31.760 --> 01:03:32.880
Absolutely, y'all.

01:03:33.039 --> 01:03:37.760
Um, like we just said, we have something special coming up, so stay tuned for that.

01:03:38.000 --> 01:03:47.280
Um, and uh, but until then, let's keep unlearning together so that we can experience more freedom.

01:03:47.599 --> 01:03:48.400
Peace.

01:03:53.039 --> 01:03:56.079
Thank you once again for listening to the Unlearned Podcast.

01:03:56.159 --> 01:04:00.320
We would love to hear your comments and your feedback about the episode.

01:04:00.559 --> 01:04:06.960
Feel free to follow us on Facebook and Instagram and to let us know what you think.

01:04:07.119 --> 01:04:13.440
We're looking forward to the next time when we are able to unlearn together to move forward towards freedom.

01:04:13.679 --> 01:04:14.639
See you then.